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+---- Thread: ROTFL, Part II (/showthread.php?tid=818)
More not so small things - HoagieOfDoom - 09-15-2005
"I think your definition of 'fun' doesn't match ours." Mars
dryly remarked.
"That's because I'm insane." Nemesis gleefully announced.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: Mein eyes! - Ebony - 09-15-2005
Quote:I bow to your superior knowledge.
...For Moses he knowses his toeses aren't roses...
is the actual third line.
Quote:I've only met most things, but we're mates.
Why yes, I know all things. I met them once at a party.
![[Image: smile.gif]](http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/smile.gif)
Ebony the Black DragonSenior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com
"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."
Re: Mein eyes! - The Wanderer - 09-16-2005
There's also:
Moses supposes his toeses is roses,
but Moses supposes amiss.
For Moses, he knowses his toeses aren't roses,
as Moses supposes his toeses is.
I learned both versions adjacent to one another, in comparatively early life...
Yep, it can get worse. - HoagieOfDoom - 09-23-2005
[My dagger] was a much plainer affair than my counterpart's
but I bet hers couldn't call up a higher level demon
just by carving a smiley face in the ground.
Can It Get Any Worse?
Yes, it can.
The population of the United States of America embraced Windows X with
the same whole hearted enthusiasm that they always have for new and
mostly useless crap. Unfortunately, Windows X allowed Bill Gates to
take control of all electronic equipment larger than a wrist watch.
The United States was promptly renamed the Land of Gates. The new
Wizard of Gates immediately began funding an advanced genetic research
program with the mission of reingineering Janet Reno into a sasquatch.
And worse...
Over the next hour I witnessed something that will remain in my memory
for however many millenia I shall live. Usagi Tsuniko, one of my
least favorite people in existance, consumed three times her own body
weight in a combination of forty six different kinds of ice cream and
a vast array of toppings. At first I assumed that she may be able to
convert mass to energy, that would explain her high energy levels, but
I ruled that out pretty quickly. That much energy would have turned
her into a human glowbug, permanently.
I thought my two gallons were respectable, but the condescending sneer
the girl levelled at me was as humiliating as anything I could
remember.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: Yep, it can get worse. - HoagieOfDoom - 10-01-2005
Hey, stringbean! The ugly head turned around. Yeah you, the walking fungus farm! Didnt anyone ever tell you its impolite to... whoa! Venus cut off her speech in a hurry as somethingtwo somethings, actuallythin and glowing shot out of a metal object lodged in the creatures right shoulder. The projectiles sailed past both her and Mars to sink deep into a snowbank, sending up a hissing cloud of steam and melting half of the piled snow in a matter of seconds.
You want to play rough? Mars asked. Fine by me. Mars Flame Sniper!
The fiery arrow took the creature straight in the head, knocking it over backwards into the snow. Beyond the toppling green goon, Mars could see that Jupiter and Mercury had already gotten the two homeowners out of harms way.
Its toast, Venus reported from somewhere behind Mars.
Not entirely, Mars disagreed, watching the creature twitch in the snow. Its not going anywhere just yet, but I think its still got some fight left in it.
Not that, Venus told her, coming up from the melted snowbank with something in her hand. Those things it shot at us were pieces of toast!
Toast? As in, twice-baked bread, peanut butter and jelly, the only thing Usagi ever seems to eat for breakfast? That kind of toast?
Burnt to a crisp, Venus affirmed, holding up a charred slice of what was indeed toast, black as coal, still steaming after its impact in the snow.
That gets my vote for weirdest attack of the year, Mars muttered.
Sailor Moon: Millenials
More:
Well, I was sort of keeping watch for you earlier, and I guess a few people got nervous when I gave them the old hairy eyeball routine.
Hairy eyeball? Michiru asked with a pained look.
What? Its a common expression.
As unlikely as it sounds, Ami said, I think she actually got one right for a change. Im sure Ive seen that phrase in a few books.
Well _of course_ I got it right, Ami-chan. Minako sounded a bit miffed. Im like the Mounties; I always get a tan.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
More from Millenials - HoagieOfDoom - 10-09-2005
Are we on course? Artemis asked.
Pluto looked up at the Garnet Orb and nodded slowly. Were getting there. This is Europe, sometime around 1000 AD. Ill need a minute to check our course before we can try...
KLAATU, BARATA, N-harrumph!
and...
"The only long-range attacking capability this design has is to pick up and throw things, so if you keep your distance and take out its limbs, it wont be able to attack you or give chase.
It might try to bite their kneecaps off, though, Ryo suggested, nodding sagely. He rocked slightly to the side as Amito Michirus silently nodded approvalpunched him in the arm. Ouch.
I am so ashamed. That took me nearly a minute to get.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: More from Millenials - Bob Schroeck - 10-10-2005
Has anyone seen any evidence that Millenials is alive? I've been waiting for the next chapter for what seems like forever now...
-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03
Re: More from Millenials - HoagieOfDoom - 10-10-2005
Last update was 2003 according to the main page.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: More from Millenials - Bob Schroeck - 10-10-2005
Well, that's forever in Internet time.
-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03
wuHuH?! - HoagieOfDoom - 10-12-2005
The reality is we may never know who baked your PSP into this flaky crust.
From the latest Penny Arcade strip.*********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: wuHuH?! - Angryoptimist - 10-12-2005
I love the look on Tycho's face in that comic, though Gabe sounds a bit more erudite than usual. -----------------
Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, when he said, "I drank what?"
- Chris Knight, Real Genius Two great tastes that go great together!
Re: wuHuH?! - VladimirTherin - 10-13-2005
Quote:Nothing gets our best speechifying going like attempting to avoid retribution justly earned.
I love the look on Tycho's face in that comic, though Gabe sounds a bit more erudite than usual.
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Wolff - 10-14-2005
Bestest. Birthday. Ever.
Not safe for work by any means, but I haven't laughed this hard in years.
-W"Ah, great. More androids." "We're not androids, we're the Knight Sabers!" "Huh. Frederick's of Hollywood has a line of power armor out. Who knew?"Falling out of aeroplanes and hiding out in holes
Waiting for the sunset to come, people going home
Jump out from behind them and shoot them in the head
Now everybody dancing the dance of the dead
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Bob Schroeck - 10-14-2005
Maybe it was because I was reading after midnight last night, but I didn't find anything burst-out-laughing funny in the three chapters I got through. Maybe when I'm more awake?
-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - jpub - 10-14-2005
It has a certain charm. Or lack thereof.
I think its the sheer absurdity of it that keeps me reading. Or the strong similarity to a train wreck.
Not sure which.
Edit: Train wreck. Definitely train wreck. I managed to flip through about 10 chapters before deciding I needed to wash my brain out.
Edit the 2nd: My word, that person has issues. Some of his other stuff is just not right.--
Christopher Angel, aka JPublic
The Works of Christopher Angel
![[Image: Con.gif]](http://www.yggdrasil.org/misc/Con.gif)
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Bob Schroeck - 10-17-2005
I gave up quickly, and didn't even bother with his other stuff...
-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Aleh - 10-18-2005
I just came across this quote:
Quote:-- From Darkness Within the Light, Chapter 2.-- This message brought to you by Ely Lilly, makers of SeraFem: Happy Pills for PMS.
Harry fooled around for the rest of his summer and before he knew it, it was time to make his debut at Hogwarts. People and power hungry bastards will not fuck with Harry Potter. Girls, however, will.
![[Image: Aleh.jpg]](http://www.animecubed.com/billy/pics/sigs/Aleh.jpg)
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Ebony - 10-18-2005
Implying that not all "power hungry bastards" are people. Which I happen to agree with. God knows that the motherless demon that is my roommate's orange tabby fucks with me often enough.
Ebony the Black DragonSenior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com
"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Aleh - 10-19-2005
Err... that was *NOT* the meaning of that quote. The author was punning on two different meanings of the phrase "fuck with".-- This message brought to you by Ely Lilly, makers of SeraFem: Happy Pills for PMS.
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Ebony - 10-19-2005
Well, I got that, obviously. But unless there's three definitions of the verb "to fuck with," then using the phrase "People and power hungry bastards ..." is redundant, unless not all power hungry bastards are people. A point that I was agreeing with.
Ebony the Black Dragon
Senior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com
"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - Aleh - 10-20-2005
Ah. Yeah. Misread your comment. Damn, I'm tired.-- This message brought to you by Ely Lilly, makers of SeraFem: Happy Pills for PMS.
Re: Cissy the Topless House Elf Avenger - WengFook - 10-20-2005
ebony wrote:
Quote:
Well, I got that, obviously. But unless there's three definitions of the verb
only three? i'm sure there are more XD_____________________________
HK-47: "Love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticule, and together, achieving a singular purpose against statistically long odds"
_________________________________
Take Your Candle, Go Light Your World.
... - HoagieOfDoom - 10-24-2005
Some more from Millenials:
Probably right next to it, Venus admitted. And while were on the subject, should I hit the spires at the top first, to shut it down and buy us some time? Or should I just go for the hole in chilled water?
Thats the whole enchilada, Artemis corrected.
Burritos to you too.
He didnt even *try* to make sense of that one.
It ain't fanfiction, but...
Dear Bobby,
I have recently purchased one of your coffee mugs, but it is giving me
no end of grief. Every time I put coffee, hot chocolate, or hot tea in
the mug, it instantly transubstantiates into what I assume is the blood
of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It sort of looks like marinara sauce,
but I'm afraid to taste it. Curiously, when I put wine into the mug,
it just turns into a nice, full-bodied chianti -- beer does the same
thing. Is there any act of sacrifice or ritual that I can perform to
stop these miracles from occurring? While I bask in His greatness and
I am truly awed by His power, I'm also kind of thirsty. Any advice
would be welcome.
Sebastian Wren, Ph.D.
Austin.Texas
www.veganza.org
From Dominic Deegan: Oracle For Hire
"Don't worry Luna, Rachel is one of the more sensible people around here. Hey, there she is! Yo, Rachel!"
"Gregory! You're just in time! I'm gonna try to break these bricks with my face!"
WHACK!!
"Ow! My face!" *********
There's no need to hear, I can shout you.
Re: ... - The Hunterminator - 11-10-2005
We could go watch a demonic sword transformed into Uchiha Sasuke recite his own rendition of a porn novel in monologue.
From never cut twice chapter 33
www.fanfiction.net/s/2292009/33/
never cut twice - drakensis - 11-11-2005
same fic, same chapter:
Under my organizational structure, all shinobi will be given a fifteen minute doughnut break twice a day.
What if they're in the middle of a battle?
It won't matter, because if I get all the villages to operate this way, both sides will take their breaks at the same time.
What kind of doughnuts?
Chocolate sprinkle.
Vive la revolution.
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.