(04-13-2019, 08:17 AM)Black Aeronaut Wrote: "I was so fucking astonished that I had to get a spatula and a step ladder to peel my eyebrows off the ceiling."

Inspired by THIS inspired comment...
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/bcjp9n/who_was_the_dumbest_person_you_ever_met_how_did/ekrzssk/

Spoiler

For the curious, I went and decompiled that gif to see what all was written in there.

• Pin me down
  
• Strip me naked
  
• Kiss my neck
  
• Ravage my ass
  
• Cuddle me gently
  
• Make me squeal
  
• Be my valentine
  
• Knock me up
  
• Choke me out
  
• Hold my hand
  
• Fuck my throat
  
• Bite my ears
  
• Bludgeon my womb
  
• Be my seat
  
• Eat my ass
  
• Fuck me senseless
  
• Paint me vanilla  (I see what you did theeerrrreee!)
  

Quote:The entire time Ozpin was questioning Roman, Neo Politan kept shooting me flirty looks and coy grins.  I know that we kinda flirted with each other in the past when we'd fought, but that wasn't enough to-

My train of thought was suddenly derailed as she took out a note book held in landscape aspect with the binding at the top.  And then, somehow without making any noise, she rapidly flipped through the pages, each one showing a request for some act of affection or sexual performance, and all the while bobbing her eyebrows at me.  They ran the gamut from sweet to raunchy with things like "Cuddle me gently" and "Be my valentine" and ranging up to "Fuck my throat" and "Eat my ass". 

Each one of those would have been enough to make me raise an eyebrow if it had just been one by itself.  But all that together at once?  Let's just say that it strained my ability to keep my composure.

But I completely lost it when I saw "Bludgeon my womb" followed up by "Knock me up" and "Paint me vanilla".

Ozpin and Roman both looked at me in surprise as I suddenly began coughing.

"Is... something wrong, Mr. Meiki?" asked Ozpin.

"*cough* oh no.  *hack*  Just peachy."

They then both looked to Neo, but she had already put the notebook away and was smiling innocently.

Ozpin and Roman then looked back at each other and it was easy for me to decipher what was silently exchanged there.

Did she just?

Oh yes, she did.  Let her be, though.  She needs this.

Right, right.

I then looked to Neo again as I finally got myself back into sorts.  Her grin was no longer quite so innocent, but instead was what I had come to know as The Vulpine Smile.

Faith?  Let the others know: we got a minor problem down here...

(04-13-2019, 09:17 AM)classicdrogn Wrote: Following the link back from that, I am reminded of the girl in one of my high school classes who went on a passionate spiel about the poor boneless chickens when we touched on GMO foods.