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+--- Thread: (STO) Some say... (/showthread.php?tid=5884)
(STO) Some say... - Logan Darklighter - 03-05-2013
Oh. My. GOD...
The Author of this Foundry mission just won for himself an automatic 5-Star Gold rating from me. Check out this bit of dialog overheard in a Neutral System Bar between 3 apparent Federation Captains:
Quote:[NPC] Captain Jeza: We're in a cross-quadrant race, and you brought a Miranda? What are you thinking of man!
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: It's got better range than that bucket of bolts you're flying, what is that a Defiant? It's hideous!
[NPC] Captain Jeza: Yours is 150 years old.
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: It's venerable!
[NPC] Captain Jeza: It has a top speed of Warp 8.7, you do understand what the word race means?
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: Go on then, what's your top speed?
[NPC] Captain Jeza: 9.6, and it's got more weapon slots, higher impulse speeds, and... and... well just look at it!
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: Yeah, I am, and I think it's making me sick. Say what you will about the Miranda, but it's not flashy, it'll fly under the radar, whereas someone will see you and think "oh he's got a Defiant, I'll target him first."
[NPC] Captain S'loe: Can I just say, you've both been idiots and and that as you'd expect I've done this properly.
[NPC] Captain Jeza: You brought an Odyssey, how is that doing it properly?
[NPC] Captain S'loe: Ah you see better hull strength, better shields, more crew. All in all more survivability.
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: It turns like a dying whale stuck in molasses!
[NPC] Captain S'loe: Space is big! What do I need to worry about turning radius for?
[NPC] Captain Jeza: Think about it, what happens when we get in a fight. You'll be so busy trying to turn round you'll run into a supernova, he'll be destroyed in one shot...
[NPC] Captain Ster Hamm: Steady on...
[NPC] Captain Jeza: And I will vanquish my foes and fly on without the two of you idiots.
[NPC] Captain S'loe: No, what'll happen is you'll yell "POWER!!!" and go right at the enemy and get blown to pieces.
(notices character listening in)
[NPC] Captain Jeza: Would mind moving there mate, you're blocking our shot.
All we need now is a star in a reasonably priced shuttlecraft and a power lap from The Stig in a Vesta Cruiser. XD
- Matrix Dragon - 03-05-2013
... I demand a mission name.
- Logan Darklighter - 03-05-2013
Matrix Dragon Wrote:... I demand a mission name.Raktajino in a Jar
It was actually a featured episode some months ago. I just got around to playing it.
- Matrix Dragon - 03-05-2013
*Spends five minutes glaring at the foundry menu. Pauses, swaps to KDF.* Ah, there it is! Thanks.
- Logan Darklighter - 03-05-2013
Oops! Should have said that. Sorry!
And yeah - KDF Mission only. It does make some assumptions about your Captain that simply are not the case with mine (Female Orion Captain, not Male Klingon). But as mentioned above, I'll forgive a LOT for that classic bit with the Top Gear Captains, and it IS a comedy mission anyway, after all. Both the MST3K mantra and Bellisario Maxim are most DEFINITELY in effect here. ^_^
- Ransan - 03-07-2013
*reads dialogue*
....but my racing yacht IS an Oddysey....
- Star Ranger4 - 03-08-2013
Yeah, but thats cause the way 'Tour the galaxy' is laid on emphasises straight line speed, not manuverability. hence the double'd duration of the QS that an Oddy gets is major
Hear that thunder rolling till it seems to split the sky?
That's every ship in Grayson's Navy taking up the cry-
NO QUARTER!!!
-- "No Quarter", by Echo's Children
- Ransan - 03-08-2013
...not to mention Borgifying the engines for that Warp 15 max speed....
- Dragonflight - 03-11-2013
I have a sudden image of someone in a Fed office somewhere, looking at the performance specs for a starship tricked out with Borg engines.
"Warp Ten is a theoretical abstract," he said with an aggrieved sigh. "It's a simple way of expressing speed in a fashion that doesn't get confusing when you compare various tech levels, and racial engine designs. After all," he continued, pointing at engines across the ages, "Warp nine on a starship from Kirk's era is barely Warp six by the modern chart. Warp one is lightspeed, while Warp ten is the theoretical maximum of the universe. So fast that literally, anywhere in the universe is the same distance as anywhere else."
He then held up the engineering schematic. "So how exactly do you plan to make this abomination fit?" He threw up his hands. "Warp fifteen indeed! It doesn't work, when Warp 10 is a theoretical abstract to begin with!"
Admiral Picard gave the spluttering engineer a patient smile as he leaned forward and pushed the schematic down. "Then I guess you're going to have to redraw the Warp curve, again."
The engineer gave the admiral a fulminating look before gathering his notes and storming out of the admiral's office. Jean-Luc watched him go and sipped his tea, trying hard not to feel smug.
---
Those who fear the darkness have never seen what the light can do.
- Matrix Dragon - 03-11-2013
A method of measuring speed that doesn't require Warp 9.9999999999999999999999999995? What a novel idea.
- Logan Darklighter - 03-11-2013
Matrix Dragon Wrote:A method of measuring speed that doesn't require Warp 9.9999999999999999999999999995? What a novel idea.*FALLS OVER*
- Logan Darklighter - 06-04-2013
Sorry for a bit of Necro here, but I came up with something and I wanted to post it for posterity before I forget about it. And it's still related to the above, because I was looking for Foundry missions to do and I remembered the above, then my brain went off on one of it's weird "scene" tangents...
"Some say that he was also frozen for 300 years, and that he spent all day pushing an effigy of J.J. Abrams through his replicator recycler...
All we know is, he's called The Stig!"
- Acyl - 06-05-2013
I dunno. Stig is obviously a Vulcan name. I mean, it starts with S...
-- Acyl
- Logan Darklighter - 06-05-2013
![[Image: Nathan-Fillion-reaction-gif.gif]](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-5wWqxDx3wO0/TymxrrmuFaI/AAAAAAAAArw/JMFy6cAt8zw/s1600/Nathan-Fillion-reaction-gif.gif)
...
*twitch*
...
Y'know... it's actually a fortunate thing that I recently bought the First Contact style "Classic White" spacesuit from the C-Store.
![[Image: 33215501ed105839673b8283d417b5221343242673.jpg]](http://images-cdn.perfectworld.com/www/33/21/33215501ed105839673b8283d417b5221343242673.jpg)
Now I can get a Vulcan BOFF and just have him wear that all the time now... ^_^;;