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Enemies of All Mankind - Addendum
06-08-2010, 09:04 PM
I'm sure most of us recall the "Enemies of All Mankind" listing of anime figures. I just thought I should let everyone know I created a new entry for Yuuki Rito of To LOVE-ru (and isn't it about time someone created one for Ezekiel Darkwood?):
To-LOVE-ru
Yuuki Rito
Slept with the Princess of the Galaxy, one of her younger sisters, and his own little sister. Has repeatedly groped no less than seven schoolmates, including a shape-shifting transsexual, as well as the school doctor, the princess's other sister, and one of the universe's deadliest assassins. Sometimes turns into a girl. Approach with great caution, the assassin is now his bodyguard, the princess is even more powerful, and her father approves of this pervert and can personally destroy worlds.
Bounty: US$30,000,000
Threat Level: Medium
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While I don't claim to understand the point of the exercise, I can't help but not see where the "enemy" part is supposed to come from.
Actually, my instinctive reaction is more like "I think I'm in love."
-Morgan.
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I guess I should clarify: these are enemies of mankind ... because they're (often unintentionally) hogging all the most attractive girls in their various anime or manga. I should also mention that their "exploits" are, shall we say, exaggerated; Rito, for instance, has "slept with" those girls only by virtue of them slipping into his bed while he's asleep, and he's a prime example of the Accidental Pervert, which accounts for all the gropings. Still, he's literally been chased by angry male classmates ... and that was when he only had two pretty girls in love with him.
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*snicker*
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Here's one for Zeke. Enjoy! (^_^)
Dear Sweet Kami-sama, Why Do You Hate Me So?
Ezekiel Darkwood
Managed to woo the firey Hino Rei, won a political marriage from the Space Oni, has had a girlfriend since the age of four year old, has contracts with several (very attractive female) kami, and is protected by the daughters of 1) a Ninja-Bodyguard clan and 2) a Yakuza family. Known accomplices are Sousuke Sagara, Ranma Saotomi, Tenchi Masaki, Yuuki Rito, and Ikuto Tohoin. He is also the chaotic-good avatar of a God of Death/Resurection/Reincarnation with a side of Chaos. He is also favored by the Nourns and Jyuraian Tree Goddess, Tsunami, and her sisters. Also known as a walking Strange Attractor - if there's something strange in town it will home in on Zeke like a HARM Missile on a SAM Site. DO NOT APPROACH UNLESS YOU ARE ASSOCIATED WITH A FREINDLY DEITY.
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DHBirr Wrote:I guess I should clarify: these are enemies of mankind ...
When you say it like that, it makes me want to zap the mans involved with the Gender Buster...
Looking at some shows, I think you'd have to assume that the population in those worlds is about 5:1 female:male... and probably all attractive too. '.'
-Morgan. Male, female, ... So?
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I'm assuming you are referring to this?
I have to ask, why isn't Ranma on there?
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Ahhh. I'll have to revamp Zeke's entry a bit then now that I have more than a few examples to go by. 
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Quote:it makes me want to zap the mans involved with the Gender Buster...
That has, in fact, happened to Rito: one of his girls is a Gadgeteer Genius who was trying to whip up something that'd enhance her (already-splendid) figure -- and she accidentally shot him with it. Every once in a while since then, she does it deliberately.
Jorlem, I, too, have wondered why Ranma isn't on the list.
Edit: By the way, blackaeronaut, considering the degree of distortion used in some of the other entries on the list, I'm pretty sure Zeke's "has had a girlfriend since the age of four" should be twisted to justify classing him as a "confirmed lolicon." I mean, look at how the listing for Sousuke outright states that he's "banged" Kaname and possibly Tessa and Melissa as well. Sousuke. Yeah, right.
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DHBirr Wrote:Quote:it makes me want to zap the mans involved with the Gender Buster...
That has, in fact, happened to Rito: one of his girls is a Gadgeteer Genius who was trying to whip up something that'd enhance her (already-splendid) figure -- and she accidentally shot him with it
You're misunderstanding me.
I meant, all the people who are classifying the people on this list as their enemies... if they are male, I want to turn them into women. (If they're female, then I'd turn them into men. I'm not picky.)
Of course, since we're talking about a device made by me, it'll wear off in about six hours. Not that it can't be reapplied as many times as necessary.
-Morgan. That scene reminds me of Kurumi/Female Nakahito in the SAK manga... delicious...
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