I Can Has ROFL Nyao? Or, The ROTFLMAO of the Catgirl

[RomanFanboy]

Funniest youtube series I have seen in a while.

http://www.youtube.com/user/TheDoctrineman

Excerpt: Doctrine Man and the Mysteries of Command Guidance

Colonel Underpants: ... They are not performing to my expectations.'

Doctrine Man: 'Yes Sir. What's the problem?'

...

Doctrine Man: 'Sir. It might help if you issued some Guidance. Maybe tell them what your expectations are.'

Colonel Underpants: 'I don't like to do that.'

Still LOL. I think the most pure joy I've felt in a while.

Watch it.

I may be confused on the names.

[DHBirr]

It's not fanfic, but I find it too hilarious not to share -- from The Wavering of Haruhi Suzumiya:

I know it's sudden, but let's put on our thinking caps.

Question 1:  What was written on that paper?
Answer:  A confession of love for Nagato.

Question 2:  In whose handwriting was it written?
Answer:  Mine.

Question 3:  What would happen if some uninformed third party read it?
Answer:  They would probably get the wrong idea.

Question 4:  What if Haruhi read it?
Answer:  I don't even want to think about that.

Thus did Haruhi Suzumiya scan the paper intently for a few minutes, eventually looking back up to me sharply, then for some reason grinning unpleasantly.
...That cinched it.  Today was not my day.

-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[SkyeFire]

From Chapter 35 of "In Flight": 

Shirou:

I was not having a conversation about partner swapping from my harem with a lesbian alien. And that might just have been the first time that particular sentence had 
ever been used in the history of language. And also oh god, I've even started calling my flock a 'harem' in my head.
This was not how I saw my life going all those years ago when my father pulled me from the fire. Something out there had to be laughing at me. I just knew it.

[ECSNorway]

"The Hogwarts Champion is," Dumbledore called loudly, snatching the flaming letter from the air. He looked at the name and frowned. "Nanoha Takamachi," he quoted, "the White Devil."

"Eh?" Fate asked, surprised. She turned to look at Nanoha, who was frozen stiff from shock. All around, people were staring at the little girl, who was still eye-to-eye with some of the second years.

"Nanoha Takamachi!" Dumbledore repeated, louder.

"She's a cheat!" one voice rang out.

Dumbledore stared at the named girl as she came up, a concerned expression on her face. "I do not think so," he said to the nameless voice. "Miss Takamachi has never used that alias herself. Others, however…" he stared out over the gathered students. "Who here added Miss Takamachi's name to the Goblet?" he demanded.

Slowly, a seventh year raised his hand, from House Slytherin. Another Slytherin raised his hand. Within a minute, the oldest students of the House of Ambition all had their hands raised.

"Explain yourselves," Karkaroff demanded.

"We wanted Hogwarts to win," one of the boys said. "And we're not afraid to cheat. Her name's been called, so it's done, right? No turning back?"

"You wanted to win, so you set this little slip o' a girl against us?" one of the Beauxbatons jeered.

Nanoha's eye twitched once and she turned to smile at Dumbledore. "Professor, I am willing to compete in this tournament. Sir."

Dumbledore looked at the angelic smile and felt the urge to pray that none of the challenges turned into duels…for their guests' sake.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8640163/6/N ... Witchcraft
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[Proginoskes]

Ah, I see Nanoha has firmly established her reputation as Little Miss WMD...

[robkelk]

Same story, earlier chapter:

"Raising," Nanoha corrected. "Her full name is Raising Heart Exelion."

"Not that 'Raging Heart' would be inappropriate," Fate muttered.

Nanoha pouted. "Mou, Fate's being mean to me."

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[robkelk]

Spotted on Usenet:

From: Galen
Newsgroups: rec.arts.anime.misc
Subject: Mao Yuusha episode1.
Date: Fri, 04 Jan 2013 15:03:47 -0500
Message-ID:

http://maoyu.jp/
http://cal.syoboi.jp/tid/2838
Licensed by CR.

what happens: The hero confronts the Demon King ...
and is defeated by her giant bouncing tits.

Drama.

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Valles]

(Incidentally, I've been following the manga Maoyuu Maou Yuusha for some time now, and while the Demon Queen is a racked moeblob, she's also an... economist.

Yes, you read that right. Step two of her master plan for Ending The War And Saving Two Worlds, right after 'Marry Hero!', is to introduce potatoes to the human agricultural package.

I enjoyed both the manga and the first episode of the show - now available on Crunchyroll, other streaming sites, and torrented fansub - immensely. Fans of Spice and Wolf are probably particularly likely to have a good time.)
===========

===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."

[robkelk]

I'm told by folks who are familiar with both the manga and the anime that the latter has been dumbed-down...
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[DHBirr]

Fans of Spice and Wolf are probably particularly likely to have a good time.

'Specially since the voice actors for the lead roles, unless that's changed since the last time I checked, will sound very familiar.  As in, the same.
Which version of the manga do you prefer?  I have some favoritism for the Ishida portrayal, particularly since it's gotten farther than the others, but the Asami version has a fascinating prologue with a little girl reading the story in an odd library -- a little girl whose eyes, hair, and and the ornament at her throat look a lot like those of Asami's Demon Queen.  Hmmmm....
One of many hilarious lines from the Ishida manga:  Female Knight referring to Demon Queen, uh, excuse me, Crimson Scholar, as "that scholar with an annoying chest."
I must now go to Crunchyroll.  Thanks for the heads-up.
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[Valles]

I'm told by folks who are familiar with both the manga and the anime that the latter has been dumbed-down...

It's possible, but I'd say that, given the amount of territory they decided to cover in the one episode we've seen so far, they haven't.

Or at least, if they have, it's too soon to say. Yes, there's been a stylistic change in how the explanations are presented - using cuts of other characters to show things, rather than just having Demon Queen exposit - but I'd say that so far, the information's there.

Which version of the manga do you prefer?  I have some favoritism for the Ishida portrayal, particularly since it's gotten farther than the others, but the Asami version has a fascinating prologue with a little girl reading the story in an odd library -- a little girl whose eyes, hair, and and the ornament at her throat look a lot like those of Asami's Demon Queen.  Hmmmm....

The Ishida version is my default also, yeah, because of its faster schedule, but the less stylized, more detailed art style in the Asami version seems to me to emphasize the A-Plot of the two worlds and the effort to bring them to terms, as does the tone of the translation.

On the other hand, while I suppose some people might be tired of the poly-romance angle that's my reading of the B-plot, I'm not, and Ishida gives that more attention, so. If not as much as Touge's...

So, having been infected by the way the stories all use language, I guess you could say that I enjoy all of them.
===========

===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."

[classicdrogn]

Ah, thank you for that critical info, Valles! I'll make sure to only read the Asami version, as I have zero interest in spineless harem weenieboy filler crap as compared to the Demon Queen, Ruby Eyes Scholar, successfully conquering the world through economics, agricultural improvement, and, yes, big boobies. Female Knight may be cute and all but enough damn triangling already, why can't a protag ever just have a healthy, happy relationship as refuge from the conflict generated elsewhere? Grumblemutteretc
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

[Valles]

'More attention' shouldn't be read as its being absent in Asami's take, you realize. Our flashbacks to the 'pre-opening scene' adventuring party are pretty clear about Female Knight and Magic User's interest, and there's a panel where Female Knight faints and is caught by Hero and his thought bubble comments on how light she is, which wouldn't be indicative in real life but probably is in a story... Maybe I should put it as Asami using finer brushstrokes. In any case, the biggest strain on Hero and Demon Queen's relationship has nothing to do with her competition. Hero's issue isn't indecision, but rather excessive self-sacrifice, and my own reading of things is that the question is whether Demon Queen, Female Knight, and Magician will team up to inform him that no, vanishing nobly into the sunset while they get on with their lives is not in the cards or if Demon Queen will get the message across on her own.

Besides, Ishida's definitely the winner on the fanservice angle, as well as being about three times as far into the story. It's not that easy a choice to make.
===========

===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."

[DHBirr]

whether Demon Queen, Female Knight, and Magician will team up to inform him that no, vanishing nobly into the sunset while they get on with their lives is not in the cards

Don't forget Grand Princess Fire Dragon (I certainly won't).  

At one point in the Touge Hiro version, Crimson Scholar exclaims, with reference to Female Knight, "It-it can't be!  Why do I have to invite Hero's previous woman into my home!?" (right in front of both of them) and Hero says, "Don't say that she's my previous woman!" 
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[Necratoid]

why can't a protag ever just have a healthy, happy relationship as refuge from the conflict generated elsewhere? Grumblemutteretc

Actually that happens all the time... its just that such a relationship is basically completely ignorable unless its a freakish anomaly compared to the other relationships around them..  It can happen on stage, but is glossed over as completely boring filler... or your watching slice of life stuff and its likely (for me at least) to be an entire series of completely boring, if occasionally slightly amusing, filler.  War series do what you want all the time... its just one of the people either dies or stays off stage.  Well you could also watch shojo... but I find much of that to be mindless and a lot of it involves people that need to have a few run ins with an axe crazy slasher for being utter scum that we have lots of informed ability that the people involved are great, awesome people in a healthy happy relationship.
If you wanted a series that has the relationships actually being worked out in a harem situation (every relationship with the male lead grows and evolves) where the participants are actually mature about it there is the largely ignored but good Shuffle!!.  Seriously, the series is freakishly a deconstruction and a reconstruction of the harem genre at the same time... and it seems completely natural in progression.

[classicdrogn]

Really? I'll have to check that out, having previously skipped it as "Ugh, yet another harem." As for the normal relationship being offscreen because it's boring... if the characters involved are the leads, all it takes is the occasional hug, calling each other by endearments, a passing kiss or caress, the look of their faces - the little things in between landscape rearranging magic battles or whatever. L Gourry was a less oblivious idiot and Lina wasn't a damn tsundere in Slayers, frex.

But, no haz ROFL
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

[Necratoid]

As I said the stable couples are ignorable by being features rather than the focus... I mean suprizingly few people realize that Goury is actually a quest reward from the OAV with Jockrock in it.  You also have to remember that Gourry is a fighter in an Epic level campaign and a lot of the stuff he doesn't know is Knowledge (X) checks at DC 35 or so on a D20.  Lets not even go into just how much SAN damage anyone listening in on their dinner talk would take.  You can actually watch the Mazoku Lords and Xellos taking SAN damage at major plot point in series.
If I wanted a single pairing with subtileness that is in a show no one mentions... Skip Beat.  Its actually using that some of the main cast are broken inside (like the primary couple) and the guy running the company they work for is actually made it a major part of their job to work on fixing that.  Oddly its a shojo and the only think they apparrently changed from the manga is the last of a rose border and sparkles flittering around the male of the couple.

[Bob Schroeck]

Folks, you have 8 posts left in which to either a) wrap this digression up or b) move it to its own thread. Because when the next ROFL thread begins I would rather not see it there.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

[robkelk]

Back to the LOLs:


--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[s3yang]

From: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8870287/1/StarGate-Lyrical

Premise: SGC dials a stargate that's in a MidChilda Museum. Due to giant coincidence, Nanoha is in the museum on her day off with vivio.

Has the following exchange as things go on:

----

"So how do we contact you?" Jack asked, although his eyes were on Vivio. Cute kid. He'd always had a soft spot for kids.

Nanoha handed him a scrap of paper. "Here," she said.

Jack took the scrap and looked it over. It was a series of numbers, seemingly random. He studied it a bit and then passed it to Carter. She looked it over, frowned, and then looked to Nanoha. "Okay, I give up. Radio frequency?"

Nanoha blinked. "It's my cellphone number." She held up a perfectly normal phone, clamshell design, pink and white cover.

"Oh," Carter stared for a moment, looking between the ubiquitous device and the phone number that suddenly made perfect sense. "How did you keep the service active from offworld?" she asked, lacking anything intelligent to say about her rather obvious blunder.

"It's on my parents' plan," Nanoha said.

----

[classicdrogn]

Tongue twisters heard recently-

"Which that which is that that which which is that?"

"Poor porous Polish pouring pores press pouty portly Paris parish porter's patience portion."

More WTF than LOL I suppose, but moderately amusing at least...
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

[RomanFanboy]

Selections from the New Gibson Pony fic or 'Why Norway might find this ponycrap to his taste. Or not.'

http://mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_ch.ph ... &id=171320

Out of Place

The sergeant gets in front and stares at me. "Lad, do all of Equestria a favor, and do not marry that mare. The planet couldn't survive your offspring," he says, and covers my mouth with his hoof.

"That perhaps you can be of assistance, vis-a-vis your current project perhaps being, inadequately or insufficiently staffed in the expert classes. The not inconsiderable gratitude of certain high government officials could be expected for allowing us to redirect your staffing problems to personnel. Although we could not provide direct assistance in any official capacity. And while the official to most greatly benefit would be unable to acknowledge your most welcome assistance, for fear of undoing the raison d'etre of the entire plan. I can say, with some confidence, that even in retirement, a wise voice and guiding hand would become available, and would be extremely fortuitous to a young pony whose start at court has been, shall we say, less than completely stellar, and would in fact change your complexion from the courtesan to the cosmopolitan. Any additional laurals from the success of your project or projects would be entirely your own and your staff's as you would care to disseminate those successes."

"Do they teach you some special trick to put all those questions into one word? If so, I have to go to sergeant school," Hardwood answered, "He can go back to work. Outwardly, he seems normal, but I just watched him go from near-catatonia possibly suicidal, to 'normal' in the blink of an eye. That usually means they've made a decision, and the decision is usually to end their life."

"Can you put me back in the world I came from?" She looks around. "It was right here a second ago."

[drakensis]

Tenten smiled as she spotted the rest of the rookies. That meant they weren't alone in this, and that was good.
Her smile kind of slipped a bit though when the two fangirls started... talking... or whatever it was that they called that thing where they opened their mouths and annoyances came out.
It didn't help that Hinata suddenly started radiating Killing Intent at the blonde for some reason.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8541061/2/Four-Teams
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.

[Shepherd]

“Hey, Bob. What’ve you been up to?”
“Well, it took me a few minutes to figure out how this thing works--and holy shit, Harry, it is a beautiful piece of work. Then I took some time to learn the languages, since this translator spell you’ve obviously been using doesn’t actually work for me. Then I started exploring Elesia’s Internet cache. . . but since then, I’ve mostly been downloading stuff from the ship’s archives.”
“What, like blueprints?” I asked worriedly. I really, really hoped Bob hadn’t been stealing classified info.
“No, no, nothing like that. Just public stuff. Entertainment for the crew.”
When Bob talks about “entertainment”, there is a very good chance he’s not talking about action movies. “Bob, tell me you have not been using this amazing fusion of magic and technology to watch porn.”
“Okay,” Bob said. “Harry, I have not been using this amazing fusion of magic and technology to watch porn. Especially not 3D, variable-perspective porn. Especially not Infinite Lust Part V: Bisexual Orgy in the Heart of Downtown Sea Bridge.” He paused for a moment. “That title sounds a lot better in Vaizenian, y’know. Lots of alliteration, and the way “bisexual” and “downtown” are conjugated actually forms this really elaborate pun--”

Fallen Stars (Dresden Files/MGLN):
http://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/ ... st-9583587
----------------------------------------------------

"Anyone can be a winner if their definition of victory is flexible enough." - The DM of the Rings XXXV

[robkelk]

From this thread:

jeff_wilson: Every time you say to go somewhere on the web without posting a link, Tim Berners-Lee turns over in his grave.

Buzzardo: Psst. He's not dead yet.

adm: That's why it's so evil.

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012