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Now this is where a sufficiently-paranoid Imma would be looking for the sensors that Uno has trained on him...
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Yes... yes. Let the SCIENCE! flow through you... give in to your urge to cackle, and your journey toward the Madness Place will be complete!
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Wow. Guess I'm not sufficiently paranoid.
Let me guess- I'm not moving at sufficient velocity, either?
Now, now. None of that. Mad science is just so sloppy, you know?
You can't depend on it to work properly. Even once it does, you can't necessarily replicate that... and there's no telling how long, or how well, your creation will work.
I'd much rather have a lot of reliable creations that function as designed... and then go to the Madness Place when it's time to use them. MWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!
**********
Then her display pinged. She swiped it closed with one hand, looked up and over at me, and nodded, then dragged the cage out of the target area. Guess that mouse must've really been okay. Good. I walked over to the line of specimen cages, grabbed the next one (another mouse), and set it on the starting point. Let's hope this one is, too.
Then I looked back at the line of cages. And that one... and that one... that one, too...
Yeah, this is going to be a long session.
...and done! I released the spell I was holding, letting the primate cage settle back down under its usual weight. The monkey inside- not a breed I'd ever seen before, what with its four arms and green fur- shook two fists at me, chittering angrily.
You really did enjoy those moon jumps you were doing, didn't you? Sorry, but I can't stay around and lighten your cage; I've other things to do.
Before the monkey could do anything more unpleasant, the teleporter activated, and both it and its cage vanished in a shimmer of light. The instant before the teleport effect happened, I gave it one last look, and caught the most comical surprised look I'd seen in months.
Hope you like your new home better.
Uno, having finished working the teleporter, walked over to where I was standing. "That was the last sample." She smiled slightly, and patted my shoulder. "Thank you for your help moving them. You saved me a great deal of effort."
I thought about that for a second. Then a bit longer. What effort? You could've just... wait... "You mean you couldn't have just teleported them straight out of the containment room?" I scratched my head, sheepishly. "I thought I was just saving us a bit of power."
That got me a bit of a frown. It's a legitimate question! "It's a containment room, Imma. Of course I couldn't. The entire area is surrounded by a powerful interdiction, and the walls carry a localized AMF; only a powerful mage could escape this room." She gave me an aside glance. "Haven't you wondered why there are so many hatches on the walls and floor? One of the reasons is so that we can introduce items- equipment, test subjects, or even prisoners- into the containment zone without having to lift the interdiction, or open the primary door."
I found myself stroking my chin as I looked around the room, noting the placement- and the ubiquity- of the hatches Uno mentioned. If they just needed items, why have wall hatches? Why ceiling hatches, and why have multiple smaller ones next to each other? There must be another reason for the hatches. "...it's a secondary benefit, isn't it? The primary purpose of that setup is to create a reconfigurable training room, but you're also using it for delivery."
That got me an approving smile and a pat on the head. "Well reasoned, Imma. The design of this room is a common one, meant for mage training; Doctor Scaglietti saw promise in it, and found a way to teleport items into the exterior mechanisms of it..."
I picked up where she left off. "...allowing him to send items into a place that could be emptied into the room, but not reached from inside. Clever."
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Hm. Is the official name for that part of the base "the Enrichment Center" by any chance?
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I doubt Scaglietti has that sort of sense of humour. There's nothing stopping Imma using the name unofficially, though...
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Scaglietti almost certainly doesn't have the cultural references to make the joke; he may coincidentally call it that, though, amusing Imma.
-- Bob
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Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
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You're quite right. They don't have the context (Portal) to associate 'testing chamber/magical confinement cell' with 'enrichment center', nor would they get it if I told them. Theoretically, I could go to the local Earth, get a copy of Portal, and show them, but there are a few problems with that.
1. That would give Jail Scaglietti IDEAS.2. MSLN Earth is only vaguely like our own, not exactly like it. Who's to say Portal exists, much less uses the same term for the lab complex?(Incidentally, I did have some fun with MSLN-America in a later snippet. For one thing, they're not Starbucks- they're Apollos.)3. Even if I did find a copy of Portal, and it was just like our version, my Earth-tech laptop probably couldn't run it. The GPU sucks.
#3 is easy to deal with, and #2 is out of my control. #1 would be a VERY BAD THING.
CD, one of the stalls there? Knife throwing. One of the prizes is furry, soft, and of interest.
**********
Uno shook her head slightly. "Not quite. You missed a layer of abstraction."
Really? Going to be that precise about it, Uno? I folded my arms across my chest, and, in as close as I could manage to my earlier contemplative tone (with just a bit of annoyed pedantry in my voice spoiling it) rattled off... "'...allowing him to send items into a place that could be emptied into a place that could be emptied into the room, but not reached from inside.' Better?"
That earned me a snort of amusement. "Yes. Much." Uno took a second to recover her usual impassiveness before continuing. "As I was saying, items can be remotely introduced into the containment room, but not removed remotely. Typically, we either have to remove used items ourselves, or have the base's automated systems do it for us. As the automated systems are mostly designed for inanimate objects-"
I get the idea. "-they wouldn't've been able to handle the rowdier test subjects, requiring us to move them by hand. I understand." I waved a hand around, indicating the large storage room we'd just entered. "But why, then, did we have to bring them all the way here? Couldn't we have just dragged them into the hallway, and teleported them from there?" As I asked the question, I saw Uno look off to one side. Interesting. What is that she's looking at?
'That' turned out to be a set of controls. Zoom in on them, and... oh. Now I see. I grinned in realization. "This isn't a storage room- at least not totally. It's also a lift."
I saw Uno beginning to smile, so I kept going. "...and, unless I miss my guess, we're almost directly beneath... yes, we're very close to being right under the lab's primary industrial teleporter. I take it that site-to-site teleports are energy-intensive?"
The smile I got from that one was both pleased and wry. "You catch on quickly. I only had to give you one hint."
Without thinking, I responded. "Thank you! I... hey!"
And lo, the Uno did laugh. And I laid ears upon the sound, and heard that it was good.
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Quote:For one thing, they're not Starbucks- they're Apollos.
-- Bob
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Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
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Bluemage Wrote:That would give Jail Scaglietti IDEAS.
I'd imagine that it would go about as well as introducing Jail to, say, 4chan...
Bluemage Wrote:Who's to say Portal exists
If it turns out that Portal doesn't exist on Nanohaverse Earth, then perhaps you could get away with pitching the idea behind it to some game studio (on Earth, Mid-Childa, or whatever; your choice).
Bluemage Wrote:For one thing, they're not Starbucks- they're Apollos.
I'm not even a fan of Battlestar Galactica, and I still got the joke! Make of that what you will...
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Wait, what stalls, where?
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You know, in the place of the merriment and wonderful prizes? From the snippet I've been writing?
Really, I couldn't resist making that joke. The rest of my alternate-Earth name changes are less silly, I promise!Well, most of them. Half of them, at least. I hope.
Tennie:-I suspect that introducing Scaglietti to 4chan would get the Cradle pointed at us.-Possibly... but without Ellen McLain, would it really be worth doing?
**********
Ding-ding~!
"Welcome to Leizgnott Personal Storage! How can I help you?"
"Oh, a friend of mine left me something. He said it was in... locker 0451?"
"Of course! Right this way!"
As I walked back to my storage locker, I had to stifle a laugh. I suppose that's all technically true... but I've never called myself my own friend before. Still, how else could I explain it? "Yeah, I'm here to pick up the stuff I stored before I lost almost twenty years of age, over a hundred pounds of weight, and a good foot or more of height?" That'd go over like a lead balloon.We stopped in front of a row of wide, flat doors, each one labeled with a number in the pointlessly-ornate Mid script. I grabbed the handle on locker 0451, and thumbed the small button next to it... only for the box to emit a loud electronic blat.
"User not recognized."
Wow. Even the lockboxes have voices... though that one's awfully bland.
The attendant- a fairly plain woman in what looked like her mid-20s- shook her head, and gently removed my hand from the handle. "It doesn't work that way, sir. I need to key you in." She then put her hand on the handle, and pushed the button.
"User recognized. Awaiting command." Okay, I think it's about time I got some sleep. I should've expected that.
She smiled at me, then turned back to the lockbox. "Request alternate user designation. Begin new user testing."
The box let out an accepting ding. "Awaiting new user."
I didn't get around to pressing the button. The instant my hand grasped the handle, the bland electronic voice of the box- or is it the store that has an AI?- spoke. "Beginning verification protocols."
When next the box spoke, it was in my voice. Well, not my voice, but my old voice- the one I used to have, back before I got my new body. I forgot how much I hated that voice. My new one is *so* much better."WHAT... IS YOUR NAME?"
I couldn't help but smile as I replied, in my best Graham Chapman. "I am Arthur, King of the Britons!"
"WHAT... IS YOUR QUEST?"
"I seek the Holy Grail!"
...okay, now which question is it going to pull?
"WHAT... IS THE WORST POSSIBLE WEAPON FOR CLOSE-RANGE COMBAT?"
That one got a chuckle out of me. I quickly suppressed it, and in a monotone voice, gave the answer. "A bomb."
The lock clicked open, and the last of my voice clips played. "Right, in you go!" It was quickly followed by the voice of the system. "New user registered. Welcome. Be advised; before you remove any of the contents of this storage device, you must pay your outstanding storage fees. Currently, you owe... two hundred and twenty-one credits. Fees may be paid at the front desk.
Thank you for using Leizgnott Personal Storage."
I hate you, past me.
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"A bomb"? Not "The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch"?
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Bluemage Wrote:I suspect that introducing Scaglietti to 4chan would get the Cradle pointed at us.
Too crazy/weird even for him? 
Bluemage Wrote:Leizgnott Personal Storage
Any connection to Gringott's (from Harry Potter), perchance? (Grin)
Bluemage Wrote:That'd go over like a lead balloon.
Erm, the Mythbusters proved that not only can you make a lead balloon, you can also make it lighter than air. I'd suggest changing it to something like, say, "lead dirigible," or "lead zeppelin"...(Grin)
Bluemage Wrote:I hate you, past me.
Just wait until you're back to the age that you were when you came to Mid-Childa...
Oh, and if you ever do get involved in time-travel-related shenanigans, you could always try punching out your past self!
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Tennie:-Too stupid, too crass... and too difficult to get out of his head.-Not at all, actually. I was just looking for a distinctive last name that fit the word-salad-esque style of MSLN, and that was the first to come to mind.-True, but: -I don't watch Mythbusters; -That's how the saying goes; -I always thought it was about how well people would take the concept of a lead balloon, not how well it'd work; -Sounds like something that'd be easy to puncture. Lead's sorta soft... and -Led Zeppelin went over rather well, which is sorta the opposite of what I was going for.
Rob:// www.youtube.com/embed/zhEH6MvNWIw?rel=0I was mixing my references.
**********
Once I'd paid the fee (curse you, storage industry, for not letting me pay more than six months in advance!), locker 0451 opened at last, revealing something I'd been missing for years now.
My laptop. My original, Earth-tech laptop, complete with messenger bag, charger, some USB keys, my favorite earbuds, and all my files.
Okay, then. I want to copy a few things off of this machine, and onto my Device. How do I go about it?
...more importantly, do I have time to go about it? It can hold quite a charge, but I was using it over two whole weeks. I seem to remember it getting pretty low.
Well, there's one good way to deal with that issue... as soon as I get the coordinates, which means a trip to a public access terminal. Better that the records of this trip stay safely anonymous.
Ten minutes later, I was pulling up a map of known space at a public terminal... and scratching my head in confusion at it. Why aren't the unadministrated worlds listed? I mean, they're labeled as such, but not named, numbered, or given coordinates. What's with that?
Eh. I'm sure there's a way around that.
To make a (half-hour) long story short, there was. None of the worlds were listed as anything but 'Unadministrated World' on the map... but since I already knew which unadministrated world I needed to find, all I had to do was search the Link for information on UAW #87. Specifics, of course, were impossible to find, but I didn't need them to narrow down Earth's location to one of three possible worlds.
Once I had a small enough sample size, I just measured the (scale) map, and extrapolated some rough, ROUGH coordinates from that. I'd never use them- they were as likely to drop me in the sun as anything- but they were enough to perform more refined searches with... and one of those searches led me to an amateur world-spotting group, which had more exact coordinate sets.
Coincidentally enough, one of those coordinate sets returned a hit on... well, it looked like the equivalent of a blog... describing a country named 'Canada'. The instant I saw that, I smiled. Pay dirt. On the correct continent, too, so I won't have to go as far to get what I need. Time to give this a shot.
I walked away from the public access station I'd been using (getting a dirty look from the guy behind me; he must've been waiting the entire time to be that irritated), and headed for the nearest park. Didn't take long to find an isolated spot; thirty seconds and a flash of light later, and I was gone.
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Canada, eh?
Better be careful - we all know what's in Canada.
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Umm, isn't Earth UAW # 97?
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I hear there's also snow and ice, and ice and snow... and Quebec. ^^
Good catch, Inquisitive Raven! Me-the-character had already been to UAW #87 earlier; I guess I got them mixed up. Fixed it in the .rtf.
**********
Looks like the tech is mostly the same. What a relief.
Twenty minutes (ten for travel, two to change out my 'Freddie' jacket for a T-shirt and jeans, and the rest spent in a currency exchange) later, I was catching up on the differences between home and the local Earth.
On the whole, things weren't too painfully different. It was raining in the Pacific Northwest, for one thing. This United States had developed along the same lines as my home reality, right down to the signs on the roads and the faces on the bills I'd picked up. Given all of that, walking into the closest Apollos and ordering a Huelgaccino only elicited a weirded-out twitch or two.
Once I got my drink (which was a good bit higher-quality than what I was used to, if a bit oddly spiced), I curled up in a surprisingly comfy chair, plugged my laptop into the wall, and fired it up. A couple seconds later- man, I love that SSD in there!- I plugged in one of my lesser USB keys (already zeroed, just for this), and opened a mental connection to Malleus.
[I'm beginning a transfer now. One file, MP3 format audio. Ready for it?]
[SENSORS READY AND TARGETED.]
Smiling, I copied one file to the USB key.
[DIFFERENCES DETECTED. FILE ISOLATED. FORMAT ANALYSIS UNDERWAY- PROVIDE ADDITIONAL SAMPLES.]
I copied over another file.
[COMMON ELEMENTS DETECTED. CONTINUE COPYING.]
This time, I copied three files.
[THREE NEW FILES DETECTED. FORMAT REGISTERED. PROCEEDING TO CONVERSION PHASE.]
I deleted four of the files from the USB drive, fired up Winamp, and queued up the one file off the drive at an extremely low volume.
[FILTERING OUT BACKGROUND NOISE. ERROR- TARGET SOUND INDISTINCT. INCREASE VOLUME OR DECREASE DISTANCE.]
[Sorry.]
I pulled my arm- the one wearing Malleus' watch form- back down in front of the laptop, resting the watch face right between the speakers. It wasn't exactly the most comfortable position, but it was one I could bear for some time. With my other hand, I ticked up the volume about a percent. That should be good.[VOLUME SUFFICIENT. BACKGROUND NOISE FILTER IN PLACE. RESTART RECORDING.]
Once I did that, Mal sat, silent, until the song ended. [DECODER ENGINEERING UNDERWAY- PROVIDE ADDITIONAL SAMPLES.]
I cleared the song that was there, copied over a different one, and started it playing. Five minutes and eighteen seconds (I was keeping track at the time- I was THAT bored) after that song ended, Malleus finally gave me another update.
[PRELIMINARY DECODER CREATED. PROVIDE ADDITIONAL SAMPLE FOR TESTING.]
Sounds like we're nearly there. What do I want to hear most?
...yeah, that'll do.Smiling at the thought- it's been FAR too long!- I copied the song over to the USB key, and waited. Shortly after that, Mal responded.
[FILE COPIED. TESTING DECODER THREE SECONDS AFTER MARK. MARK.]
Precisely three seconds later, a burst of garbled, electronic nonsense came over the telepathic connection, followed by... I'm still not sure how to describe it. The result of running a badly-dubbed tape through a glitched out player, backwards, while juggling electromagnets next to it, maybe?
I could hear the beat I was expecting, though it never quite managed- even at its best!- to sound right. The 'song' couldn't seem to stick to a consistent tempo, nor could it hold a key; almost more jarring was the fact that one would change independently of the other. On top of all that, the instruments themselves sounded off, and short bursts of electronic static occurred at what seemed like random intervals.
It was, to put it briefly, a disaster.
[Mal, ol' buddy? We've got a LOT of work to do.]
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Couldn't you just grab whitepapers on programming language, then the ffmpeg source or something? Seems much more straightforward than trying to reverse engineer the stuff directly.
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I would have just had Mal download the codecs and figure them out for himself. I mean, it's not like he can't count, right? And since TSAB has ostensibly been to UAW97 every now and then they probably got some sort of primer for Earth-based coding languages. It would only make sense since it'd be the fastest way to gain info on what the Earthlings have been up to lately.
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blackaeronaut Wrote:... And since TSAB has ostensibly been to UAW97 every now and then ... I suspect they're around more often than "every now and then" - the first episode of A's shows there's regular mail service between Earth and MidChilda.
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Quote:robkelk wrote:
Quote:blackaeronaut wrote:
... And since TSAB has ostensibly been to UAW97 every now and then ...
I suspect they're around more often than "every now and then" - the first episode of A's shows there's regular mail service between Earth and MidChilda.
.... and Probably Admiral Graham's doing, to boot. The British love their postal system.
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When I was writing this scene, I originally planned to have the two of us reverse-engineer the codec on our own, but I couldn't think of a way to make it happen that didn't drag horribly. I eventually just said 'screw this- if I can't figure out how to write this, I sure as heck would give up on doing it!', and wrote it this way.
As for TSAB knowledge of Earth programs, I'm just going to shrug on that one. They may very well know how to read the Internet like an open book, but that doesn't mean I do. If memory serves, the TSAB prefers not to meddle in UAWs- more so than the Ministry of Magic avoids muggles, but less than the Federation and pre-warp civilizations. I figure that yes, they know a lot about Earth. They infrequently make visits to Earth- more so when Earthborn mages in high places (Graham) want it, and/or powerful mages they want to court (Nanoha) live there. But they don't go telling everybody and their mother where it is, what it's like, or how to pirate their music.
**********
Five hours. It took us five hours of research, development, redevelopment, aural punishment, and re-redevelopment- a very painful five hours, mentally and physically- just to get everything figured out.
I can still feel the headache some of our attempts gave me.
During that time, I had to relocate quite a few times. I ended up visiting a couple of other Apollos, a MacLeods (which actually made me laugh- truly, the Kaleidoscope is an amazing thing), and the local Rex Brechdan.
Had to look that one up. Wow.
Anyway, it turned out that Malleus was having a few more issues with the MP3 file format than expected. I eventually had to hunt down the complete specifications for it (an impressively boring task, if only because the other standards that the MP3 file format was built on were documented quite dryly), and have him start fresh based on that.
Luckily, I was dumped into a universe where the important things haven't changed. The Internet managed to solve that problem... eventually.
(I also checked. USB still works precisely as expected, and the video players available around here can read my anime just fine. I can't believe I didn't think of that when I sent off that USB key.)
Once we got a working music player figured out, I spent another half hour or so transferring files over, dropped my laptop off back at the storage place, and then plotted out a trip back to Valle del Sol. I had a debt to settle, after all.
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It's been a while - refresh my memory, please. What happened in Sunnydale... er, Valle del Sol?
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Sorry for the short post today. Massively exhausted for some reason. >.>
That was where SI-me fought the communist mobster mages in the mining town. Lost an arm, swore revenge.
Also, thank you for admitting to getting the name. Do I need to make it more obvious, or less?
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I think it's just obvious enough, myself. But I've thought some things were obvious that other people missed...
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