Fate/Stay/Day In The Life: A Crackfic concept

[OpMegs]

This resulted from Stormgear and myself tossing notes back and forth on what the ultimate Good End for Fate/Stay/Night would be....and mutated into a massive Fate/Zero&Fate/Stay/Night crossover Perfect End where everyone lives together and has wacky hijinx.
Character sheets for Fate/Stay/Night and Fate/Zero, courtesy of TV Tropes, for reference.

[05:58] OpMegs: ....honestly, can you imagine an alternate
Nasuverse where the entire servants of both wars (minus True Assassin and
Kiritsugu Caster) are hanging out?

[05:58] OpMegs: Lancer and Lancer are drinking buddies!

[05:59] Stormgear: Yes.

[05:59] Stormgear: Yes indeed.

[05:59] Stormgear: Reminiscing on a war nobody else seems to
care about.

[05:59] OpMegs: Iskander noogies Gil whenever he gets too
full of himself!

[05:59] Stormgear: Shirou is the adopted son of Kiritsugu
Emiya and Emiliya Einsburn!

[05:59] OpMegs: Ilya has a wonderful, full family!

[06:00] Stormgear: Yes indeed!

[06:00] Stormgear: Kiritsugu is concerned and somewhat
impressed at Shirou's ability to attract women. Less so in Shirou's older
brother.

[06:00] OpMegs: And Berserker cuts down Christmas trees for
orphans.

[06:00] Stormgear: Berserker RUNS THE ORPHANAGE.

[06:00] OpMegs: And he was the most beloved monster looking
giant ever

[06:01] Stormgear: Indeed.

[06:01] Stormgear: ;_;

[06:01] OpMegs: Also, Sakura was never adopted.

[06:01] Stormgear: ...

[06:01] Stormgear: Yes indeed.

[06:01] Stormgear: The Matous are a normal, if dysfunctional
family.

[06:01] Stormgear: With Epic Level Housemaid: Rider-san.

[06:01] Stormgear: Assisted by Epic-Level Combat Butler, Assassin.

[06:01] Stormgear: (True Assassin.)

[06:01] OpMegs: Caster is happily married

[06:02] OpMegs: and teaching Chemistry at the local school

[06:02] Stormgear: Kojiro is their bodyguard.

[06:02] Stormgear: As a favor to DEATH-SENSEI.

[06:02] Stormgear: And because he's a freeloader.

[06:02] Stormgear: Caster tolerates him because he attracts
girls for her to throw in costumes.

[06:02] OpMegs: He and True Assassin get together some days
to arm wrestle

[06:03] Stormgear: It's always a stalemate because True
Assassin always uses his petrified arm.

[06:03] OpMegs: And the Black Knight keeps following Saber
around

[06:03] OpMegs: Everyone thinks it's kinda weird, but he's
okay otherwise

[06:04] OpMegs: Most people assign it to an unrequited crush

[06:04] Stormgear: >_>

[06:04] Stormgear: _>

[06:12] OpMegs: Also, Kotomine is....um...at the same monastery
as Shinji. His only joy comes from smacking the boy over the head with a ruler.

[06:12] Stormgear: He is then smacked over the head by the
new nun in town.

[06:12] Stormgear: Both enjoy physically abusing Shinji.

[06:13] OpMegs: .....Taiga!

[06:13] Stormgear: Taiga is still Taiga.

[06:13] Stormgear: Not much needs to change.

[06:13] Stormgear: Except that she's the school Kendo
Instructor.

[06:13] OpMegs: Though she and Caster have collaborated on
costuming for the school plays

[06:13] Stormgear: Mitsuzuru is somehow working at the Mato
residence.

[06:13] OpMegs: She always wonders where Caster gets all
these wonderful clothes.

[06:14] Stormgear: ...So are all of her friends. Many
believe it's because of Rider-San and a good deal of blackmail.

[06:14] Stormgear: Caster designed their uniforms on
request.

[06:14] OpMegs: Rin is not unappreciative of the new
uniforms

[06:14] OpMegs: They're a bit revealing, but the view on the
female student bod-er.....um. Yes. Totally improper. Yes.

[06:15] OpMegs: Outrage, um....shame.....where's Saber....

[06:15] Stormgear: Saber and Shirou are, of course, fianced.

[06:15] OpMegs: Of course.

[06:15] OpMegs: The wedding is expected to be the biggest
event the town's ever seen

[06:16] OpMegs: Of course, there was a slight
misunderstanding and Saber almost ended up wearing a suit

[06:17] Stormgear: The Dress is also a Caster-Creation.

[06:17] Stormgear: It may or may not be legal to wear in
public.

[06:18] Stormgear: Rider is suspiciously competent at a
range of fields. She teaches history at school, and somehow still finds time to
be the Mato Family Maid.

[06:18] Stormgear: She... also never seems to sleep. The
class suspects her of being a vampire. They're wrong.

[06:18] Stormgear: She's really more of a succubus.

[06:19] OpMegs: Archer and Gilgamesh are considered the
great rivals of the town

[06:19] OpMegs: It's all in good fun, but they can't help
competing at anything

[06:19] OpMegs: The last eating contest emptied out all the
curry in town

[06:19] Stormgear: Shirou ultimately gets dragged in.

[06:20] Stormgear: Somewhere, in a distant church, a Nun
collapsed in tears.

[06:20] Stormgear: (Ciel senpai detects a disturbance in the
FORCE.

[06:21] OpMegs: Also, at night, there is sometimes drag
racing

[06:21] OpMegs: Iskander, Rider, and Saber are known to
trade the top three spots constantly

[06:23] Stormgear: Nobody quite... knows why Iskander is so
popular.

[06:23] Stormgear: For whatever reason, his words somehow
seem irresistible.

[06:23] OpMegs: He's also great fun at football games.

[06:23] OpMegs: Though he takes up half the couch

[06:24] OpMegs: Gil has challenged Taiga at the kendo club
once a week for months

[06:24] OpMegs: He never wins, despite bringing a new sword
every time

[06:24] OpMegs: He is flummoxed by this

[06:24] OpMegs: Saber just watches and giggles quietly

[06:25] OpMegs: She also has a second storage house behind
her and Shirou's place for her plushie collection

[06:25] Stormgear: He has declared it his new goal to obtain
the mythical Taiga-Shinai

[06:25] OpMegs: It's actually smaller than it should be due
to spatial warping via her Gate of Avalon, which is needed to store all of
them.

[06:26] OpMegs: She got advice from Gil on how to store all
of them because he has so much stuff himself after all

[06:26] Stormgear: ...And of course, because Gil is
powerless before Saber.

[06:27] OpMegs: He's the unlucky childhood friend

[06:27] OpMegs: He's known Saber the whole time, but it was
one look between her and Shirou and boom

[06:27] OpMegs: love at first sight

[06:27] OpMegs: Kiritsugu was amused, but greatly pleased to
have Saber as an official part of the family

[06:28] Stormgear: Because Saber was, too, Kiritsugu's
student.

[06:28] Stormgear: Long, long ago.

---
"Oh, silver blade, forged in the depths of the beyond. Heed my summons and purge those who stand in my way. Lay
waste."