Twitching, twiddling his fingers, Shinji looks across the space
between the two couches. He sits in one. She sits in the other.
She smiles, sweetly, unaware of the cold terror that grips the pit of
his stomach. The door to the apartment is closed. The words and
warning ring in Shinji's ears.
“So,” Ichi says, “What'd you want to talk about?”
“Sex.”
Shinji winces. Did he just say that out loud? In front of his
sister?
“Oh,
you mean it's time for the Talk,” Ichi says, face splitting with a
grin with an audible whir, “Awesome.
How'd Mom get you to do this?”
“It's my punishment for almost ending the world,” Shinji sighs,
“Okay. So, when a Man and a Woman really like each other-”
“He puts the wood in her.”
Shinji
blinks, staring at the girl. Did she just say that? Did his little
sister
just say that?
“What?”
“Well, I am kinda curious,” Ichi says, cocking an eyebrow,
tapping her fingers together, “What does that mean, exactly? I'm
not sure what it means when they say that. Do you actually put wood
inside her? Wouldn't that give her splinters?”
He chokes, mildly, sipping water as his mind whirrs on how to give
the sex talk to the anthropomorphic robotic representation of his
little sister. Who is in fact a genderless 60 meter tall cyborg.
“Well, okay,” Shinji says, “Remember when Mom took us to the
beach? And Uri and I got into a fight? About bedtimes?”
Ichi nods.
“It wasn't about bedtimes.”
Ichi nods...and then her eyes go wide. Her mouth opens.
“Ooooooo. You put your dingaling in Asuka's hooha.”
“What.”
“Internet
access,” Ichi says, “So that's
sex. I want details.”
between the two couches. He sits in one. She sits in the other.
She smiles, sweetly, unaware of the cold terror that grips the pit of
his stomach. The door to the apartment is closed. The words and
warning ring in Shinji's ears.
“So,” Ichi says, “What'd you want to talk about?”
“Sex.”
Shinji winces. Did he just say that out loud? In front of his
sister?
“Oh,
you mean it's time for the Talk,” Ichi says, face splitting with a
grin with an audible whir, “Awesome.
How'd Mom get you to do this?”
“It's my punishment for almost ending the world,” Shinji sighs,
“Okay. So, when a Man and a Woman really like each other-”
“He puts the wood in her.”
Shinji
blinks, staring at the girl. Did she just say that? Did his little
sister
just say that?
“What?”
“Well, I am kinda curious,” Ichi says, cocking an eyebrow,
tapping her fingers together, “What does that mean, exactly? I'm
not sure what it means when they say that. Do you actually put wood
inside her? Wouldn't that give her splinters?”
He chokes, mildly, sipping water as his mind whirrs on how to give
the sex talk to the anthropomorphic robotic representation of his
little sister. Who is in fact a genderless 60 meter tall cyborg.
“Well, okay,” Shinji says, “Remember when Mom took us to the
beach? And Uri and I got into a fight? About bedtimes?”
Ichi nods.
“It wasn't about bedtimes.”
Ichi nods...and then her eyes go wide. Her mouth opens.
“Ooooooo. You put your dingaling in Asuka's hooha.”
“What.”
“Internet
access,” Ichi says, “So that's
sex. I want details.”