Quote:All we know is...why is the Stig stealing the Bolo?"
Flashcut to grainy Top Gear security cam footage. STIG, majestic in the moonlight, enters the frame by kicking a door off its hinges - doubly impressive once the audience is told that it is a roll-up door. Switch to another security camera, where STIG can be seen to have a bouquet of FLOWERS in his hand. STIG approaches the BOLO slowly, tenatively, and proffers the flowers while looking away, much like a nervous schoolboy. The BOLO, for (her?) part, vaporizes the bouquet with a lick of flame from one of her weapons ports.
Flashcut to security cam footage from a LAS VEGAS drive-up chapel. STIG is standing next to the BOLO, who has her main gun trained on a visibly sweating priest. STIG is holding a large golden ring, sized to fit the BOLO's main gun.
Flashcut back to the boys.
"Well, that's settled then. Join us next time, assuming Stiggy survives the honeymoon"
CLOSING CREDITS: Jessica (Top Gear Remix 2028)
"No can brain today. Want cheezeburger."
From NGE: Nobody Dies, by Gregg Landsman
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5579457/1/NGE_Nobody_Dies