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Dead Bang chapter 7

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Dead Bang chapter 7
Necratoid
Unregistered
 
 
#14
05-04-2011, 05:35 AM
I can't help, but think that any take over the world plot that involves you enemies suddenly acting out of character as the main lynch pin will fail.  I mean the AD Police has been making efforts at live capture sense some told them their live capture equipment was actually useful beyond taking up trunk space.  Then again the same plot involves every person that randomly gets super powers siding with and leading the Firsters... This is what happens when your not genre savvy and practicing cartoonish levels of super villainy.
---
Found 2 random errors myself:
 Chapter 2: Hilton Hotel, Megatokyo, 2:30 PM

Quote:Nearby, her wife was sitting staring out the windows at the city, not really seeing the buildings spread out around them, as she played out the moment she'd heard of her grandfather's death yet again.
Kou wife is his wife
Chapter 5: 6:30pm, GENOM Tower, Megatokyo

Quote:"Kate smiled and shrugged. "Soon enough, I think.
Outlaw quotation mark starting a paragraph.  14 paragraphs down
  
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Messages In This Thread
Dead Bang chapter 7 - by Dragonflight - 05-02-2011, 11:23 PM
[No subject] - by Glidergun - 05-03-2011, 12:07 AM
[No subject] - by HoagieOfDoom - 05-03-2011, 12:39 AM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-03-2011, 12:51 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-03-2011, 02:02 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-03-2011, 02:56 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-03-2011, 03:17 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-03-2011, 03:20 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-03-2011, 03:23 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-03-2011, 03:25 AM
[No subject] - by HoagieOfDoom - 05-03-2011, 04:43 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-03-2011, 06:09 AM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-03-2011, 11:22 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-04-2011, 05:35 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-04-2011, 03:14 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-04-2011, 03:32 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-04-2011, 03:33 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-04-2011, 03:51 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-04-2011, 06:22 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-04-2011, 11:18 PM
[No subject] - by sweno - 05-04-2011, 11:36 PM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-05-2011, 01:44 AM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-05-2011, 04:42 AM
[No subject] - by Foxboy - 05-05-2011, 07:52 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-05-2011, 09:18 AM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 05-05-2011, 02:12 PM
[No subject] - by Rod.H - 05-05-2011, 02:54 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-05-2011, 05:48 PM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-06-2011, 06:40 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-06-2011, 07:20 AM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 05-06-2011, 03:20 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-07-2011, 06:10 AM
[No subject] - by Black Aeronaut - 05-07-2011, 07:26 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-07-2011, 04:16 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-07-2011, 06:50 PM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-08-2011, 03:57 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-09-2011, 03:40 AM
[No subject] - by Ebony - 05-09-2011, 05:38 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-09-2011, 07:50 PM
[No subject] - by sweno - 05-09-2011, 10:54 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-09-2011, 11:41 PM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 05-10-2011, 01:00 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-10-2011, 02:41 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-10-2011, 03:22 AM
[No subject] - by CattyNebulart - 05-10-2011, 04:26 AM
[No subject] - by Epsilon - 05-10-2011, 06:15 AM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-10-2011, 06:27 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-10-2011, 07:38 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-10-2011, 07:43 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-10-2011, 07:57 AM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-10-2011, 04:21 PM
[No subject] - by Glidergun - 05-10-2011, 09:53 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-10-2011, 10:38 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-11-2011, 09:56 AM
[No subject] - by s3yang - 05-11-2011, 07:12 PM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-11-2011, 07:38 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-11-2011, 10:25 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-12-2011, 01:11 AM
[No subject] - by happerry - 05-12-2011, 04:15 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-12-2011, 11:42 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-13-2011, 01:44 AM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-13-2011, 07:24 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-13-2011, 03:24 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-13-2011, 06:55 PM
[No subject] - by Dartz - 05-13-2011, 07:34 PM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-13-2011, 10:02 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-13-2011, 11:08 PM
[No subject] - by Glidergun - 05-13-2011, 11:54 PM
[No subject] - by Ebony - 05-14-2011, 12:27 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-14-2011, 01:11 AM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-14-2011, 01:30 AM
[No subject] - by Glidergun - 05-14-2011, 01:38 AM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 05-14-2011, 02:31 AM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-14-2011, 03:27 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-14-2011, 06:23 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-14-2011, 07:11 PM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-14-2011, 08:05 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-14-2011, 10:01 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-15-2011, 08:20 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-15-2011, 08:31 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-15-2011, 09:14 PM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-16-2011, 04:03 AM
[No subject] - by Norgarth - 05-16-2011, 06:40 AM
[No subject] - by itsune9tl - 05-16-2011, 08:59 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-16-2011, 10:55 PM
[No subject] - by Ebony - 05-16-2011, 11:59 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-17-2011, 12:33 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 05-17-2011, 12:45 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-17-2011, 05:21 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-18-2011, 04:40 AM
[No subject] - by Ebony - 05-18-2011, 03:25 PM
[No subject] - by Proginoskes - 05-18-2011, 11:42 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-24-2011, 06:53 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-24-2011, 07:17 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-25-2011, 04:08 AM
[No subject] - by ECSNorway - 05-25-2011, 10:43 PM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-25-2011, 11:49 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-26-2011, 06:00 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-26-2011, 08:20 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-26-2011, 08:59 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-29-2011, 04:33 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-30-2011, 04:06 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-31-2011, 12:25 AM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-31-2011, 02:10 AM
[No subject] - by CattyNebulart - 05-31-2011, 02:41 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 05-31-2011, 02:59 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-31-2011, 06:36 AM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-31-2011, 09:02 AM
[No subject] - by Necratoid - 05-31-2011, 09:54 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 05-31-2011, 11:11 PM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 06-06-2011, 12:20 AM
[No subject] - by Inquisitive Raven - 06-07-2011, 01:19 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 06-07-2011, 04:52 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 06-07-2011, 07:19 PM
[No subject] - by Valles - 06-08-2011, 12:43 AM
Re: Twisted Path - by aeroprime - 06-08-2011, 09:56 AM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 06-08-2011, 02:26 PM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 06-09-2011, 01:48 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 06-16-2011, 11:59 PM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 06-17-2011, 12:06 AM
[No subject] - by Disruptor - 06-17-2011, 12:58 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 06-17-2011, 02:07 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 07-04-2011, 09:21 PM
[No subject] - by robkelk - 07-05-2011, 02:44 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 07-05-2011, 02:53 PM
[No subject] - by Deadpan29 - 07-09-2011, 06:17 PM
[No subject] - by Bob Schroeck - 07-10-2011, 04:18 AM
[No subject] - by Dragonflight - 07-20-2011, 12:52 AM

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