I Can Has ROFL Nyao? Or, The ROTFLMAO of the Catgirl

[robkelk]

http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?578 ... st14470902]Shadowjack's watched episode 107...

Artemis: "Wait a minute. Usagi and a fresh-baked apple pie? Are we safe?"
Rei: "We're perfectly safe. It's the pie that's in danger."

Usagi: "Don't rush the girl with a knife, Rei. I might cut myself."
Rei: "Your suffering only makes it taste that much sweeter."
Usagi: "I might cut someone else, too."
Minako: "'Nothin' says lovin' like blood-spattered pastry from the oven.'"
Makoto: "That one wasn't up to your usual standard, Mina."
Minako: "'How d'ya like them apples'?"
Makoto: "No."
Minako: "'In this moment, we are all Americans.' That's a tricky one, you have to think about it—"
Makoto: "Feed your piehole."

Chibi-Usa: "Stupid Usagi stole my specially-baked pie that I specially baked for Masanori! "
Rei: "And that's terrible. ¡IN THE NAME OF MARS, I SHALL CHASTISE YOU!"
Mom (from downstairs): "No fireballs in the house!"
All: "Yes, Mrs. Tsukino."
Minako: (How does she do that?)
Rei: "…"
Usagi: "…"
Rei: "…"
Usagi: "…"

Chibiusa runs up and sees Masanori, and smiles in joy. Masanori is a typically-bland-and-inoffensive boy, about a year or two older than she. Seriously, most of the generic love interest boys in this 'burg have only slightly more personality than a wooden mannikin. No wonder so many of the girls go for girls, at least they have different hairstyles.

The Professor: "AT LAST! FINALLY, ALL HAS FALLEN INTO MY HANDS! There's no additional charge for this, is there?"
Eudial: "Of course not!"
Eudial: /makes a note to double the next mission's fee, because goddammit, she's a freelancer and she can do that.

Eudial (via megaphone): "EVERYONE REMAIN PERFECTLY CALM! THERE IS NO CAUSE FOR ALARM! GO ON WITH WHAT YOU WERE DOING!"

Everyone shrugs and goes back to—

Masanori: "—waaaaaaait a minute. Who are you?"

Luna: "…She's your daughter."
Usagi: "That was kind of cool, wasn't it?"
Luna: "That's not what I meant."

Chibi-Usa: "How come my transformation theme is two seconds long and played on a kazoo, while yours is two minutes long and played with a full choir?"
Usagi: "Because I have longer hair."
Chibi-Usa: "Oh, okay."

Suddenly! Sailors Moon and Chibi-Moon burst in, dramatically!
Usagi: "Prepare for trouble!"
Chibi-Usa: "Make it double!"
Usagi: "To protect the world from devastation!"
Chibi-Usa: "To unite all peoples within our nation!"
Usagi: "To pronounce the virtues of truth and love!"
Chibi-Usa: "To extend our reach to the stars above!"
Usagi: "Sailor Moon!"
Chibi-Usa: "Sailor Chibi-Usa!"
Usagi: "In the name of the Moon, blast off at the speed of light"
Chibi-Usa: "Surrender now, or prepare to fight!"
Luna: "I'm not with them. I don't know these people."

Michiru: /climbs a tree and hides.
Work #002: /trips and falls into the lake.
Work #002: "…"
Work #002: /melts.
Michiru: "…"
Michiru: "I meant to do that."

Chibi-Usa: "Or did you get weaker?"
Michiru: "No. No? I don't feel weaker. Do you?"
Haruka: "Yeah, actually."
Michiru: "What? Why?"
Haruka: "Because last night you kept saying, 'one more—'"
Michiru: "NOT IN FRONT OF THE KID!"

And a few posts later...

I think I've been very good so far in avoiding Monty Python references.

Uranus: "Go and tell your mistress that we have been charged by God with a sacred quest. If she will give us food and shelter for the night, she can join us in our quest for the Holy Grail."
Venus: "Well, I'll ask her, but I don't think she'll be very keen… uh, she's already got one, you see?"
Uranus: "What?"
Michiru: "She says they've already got one!"
Uranus: "Are you sure she's got one?"
Venus: "Oh, yes, it's very nice! (I told her we already got one.)"
Uranus: "Well, um… can we come up and have a look?"
Venus: "OF COURSE NOT!"

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012