My Little Plotpony: Sharing is Fun

[Foxboy]

Crossposted From the Brainstorming thread about MLP on Spacebattles:

The dull grey earth pony looked up at the strange creature before him. "Say that again?"
Discord sighed dramatically. "Why do I have to keep repeating myself to you ponies?" The draconequus twisted his sinuous body through a knot and got deeply into the pony's personal space, one red eye seeming to reflect an image as he spoke.
"Put simply, my little pony," Discord said as the pony's reflection seemed to recede into an image of his home town, Fillydelphia. "You are so alone." An almost dramatic spotlight lit the pony's reflection as shadowy ponies walked and flew by, ignoring him. "It's not easy, is it, being a blank flank at your age?" Some of the shadowy fillies walking past shuddered in mean-spirited laughter, and one of the shadow stallions trotted by with his coterie of admirers swooning behind. "Always overlooked by the fillies, especially when there are more dashing stallions around."
The pony fought back tears as one shadow in particular echoed the latest heartbreak that had made him leave Fillydelphia. "S-stardust?" The shadowed version of the elegant unicorn filly turned and silently, angrily derided him. He didn't need to her her sweet voice twisted in cruelty again, her words were already etched into his heart. The pain was just as bad seeing this shadow version leave with that pompous pegasus, Cirrus.
"Sad, isn't it?" Discord sighed in sympathy. "But my offer stands. How," he said, his lion paw caressing the pony's cheek, "would you like to get your cutie mark and true love?"
Doubt still creasing his face, the pony replied, "I'm listening."
"Well, first," Discord said, "I don't do favors for nothing, but I don't think you'll mind my price all that much." The draconequus stepped back and held up six playing cards spread evenly, each with the picture of an attractive filly, two unicorns, two pegasi, and two earth ponies. The colt recognized one of the pegasi as a model who had been in all the magazines a few months back.
"What's the price?" he asked hesitantly.
"Well, true love isn't easy. My price is that you have to make an honest effort to get to know each of these lovely ladies before you decide which one you want."
"That's all? But why would any of them want an ugly blank flank like me?"
"Well you won't exactly be ugly or a blank flank when you meet them, Hesperides." Smiling at the colt's confusion, Discord continued. "That's the last piece of my price, you give up your name and take Hesperides in its place. A new start and a new name, isn't that fair?"
The colt swallowed dryly. "And one of them will love me?"
Pleased that his hook was working, Discord smiled. "My lad, with the extras I'm giving you, they all will."

''We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat
them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.''

-- James Nicoll