Bob Schroeck Wrote:I second Prog on that -- the Nendo-Kata by themselves are a great idea and a wonderful concept, well-executed with a believable culture and history. I think you should use them a bit more sparingly, though -- they're a big enough device that their arrival in the story should be part of the point of the story, as in Phoenix From The Ashes (or whatever the right title is -- the continuation of "The Bet: Crippled" you wrote).Well, the original 2000 version of that story was Like A Phoenix From the Grave, which was done in a pretty heavy-handed manner when it came to people like Genma and Nodoka. When I looked at it a couple years ago, I had to seriously wince at some of the things I did, so I reworked the whole plot to create the modern Phoenix From the Ashes.
In it, I did away with the Nendo-kata sub-plot altogether and brought in the Avalonians wholesale. Also, I made it a three-way crossover between Ranma 1/2, Urusei Yatsura and Ikkitosen, thus allowing me to bring characters such as Moroboshi Hiromi AKA Ryuko Kyorei into play.
I also introduced Genma's mother Hayashi Chiaki and the idea of he and Nodoka agreeing to a "pre-marital agreement" which made them vow that they would raise any children of theirs "properly"…and not "honourably." This, of course, would throw Nodoka off-kilter right from the get-go; Chiaki would "welcome back" Ranma (and his new sisters, Kikuko and Miiko AKA Ryuen Kunro) into the Hayashi family. I also brought in other ideas such as Nodoka being actually part-American (inspired from Suikoden One-half by MadHat886).
There are a tonne of other things, too.
Canadian lighthouse to U.S. Warship approaching it: "This is a lighthouse. Your call!"