[Commentary Thread] Dear Sweet Kami-sama, Why Do You Hate Me So?

[robkelk]

While re-reading to see what the changes were, I noticed a couple of possible typos in one section. In any other story, I'd be sure they are typos, but ... it's Zeke.

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I woke to the sound of fluttering wings and reflexively began to feel around. All I found in my bed was a hallow space that was still warm.

Is Zeke starting to think of Deimos as a demigoddes, or should "hallow" be "hollow" there?

In addition to the usual student’s compliment of stationary, workbooks and supplies,

As opposed to those mobile workbooks and supplies... Maybe some of his notes do wander off, and these are the others?
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012