Quote: You open one of the 998 boxes on this floor and find...
A coin-operated time machine. It is mounted on a heavy cuff which is worn on the left wrist (for some reason, the cuff will not snap closed on the right
wrist). It accepts any U.S. coins, even non-standard sizes. To activate it, insert a coin in the slot and turn the knob. The user will be taken to
today's date in the year the coin is dated (but only if the coin is genuine and has not been altered or backdated). Duration of the trip is one minute
for each cent of the coin's denomination. Thus, a 1963 quarter will take the user to 1963 for 25 minutes.The machine does not travel through space,
however; going to the roof of a building and then going back to before it was built is hazardous. Basements are worse. The user may only take along what he
can carry, and none of it remains behind when the time expires.
Whoah!
Quote: You open one of the 998 boxes on this floor and find...
A mirror festooned with wires and vacuum tubes around the edges and large suction cups on the back. There are two sturdy handles on either side and
obvious connection points for electricity to be supplied. Careful inspection reveals a corroded brass plate near the connection points that reads
(50,000-60,000v).
Huh. Wonder what it does?
Quote: You open one of the 998 boxes on this floor and find...
A detailed plan for the creation of mindless slaves from the ordinary citizenry. The plan includes a description of the device used for the
transformation, which is a flat black wafer roughly 3.5 inches on a side. Included with the plan is a box of free trial diskettes from a large online
service.
SNRRRRT!
Quote: You open one of the 998 boxes on this floor and find...
The 1998 edition of Erwin Kreyszig's Advanced Engineering Mathematics, written in Elvish (except for the equations, which are in the standard
Dwarvish notation).
... Okay, now THAT is COOL.
Quote: You open one of the 1001 boxes on this floor and find...
A finely made katana. It is not able to cut things, but rather joins things together, closing wounds, sealing doors, and even, with the right sword forms,
healing a rift between friends and reuniting lost loves.
Nanoha would probably love this thing. Too bad we can't send it to her.
Quote: You open one of the 1001 boxes on this floor and find...
The Fourth Wall. Attempting to go past it would probably not be a very good idea.
O_o
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A high-quality, full-featured cellular phone. It operates normally. If it rings, all onlookers will patiently allow you to answer and finish the call,
even if they were about to kill you.
Heh. That's actually kinda handy.
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A TL8 military gauss gatling staple-gun with 4,000,000 rounds of 'smart' monowire ammo.
Okay, who's got some Red Tape to get through? *evil grin*
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A magician's wand. If you concentrate your will on it while pointing it at someone else, the person you are pointing the wand at will spontaneously
combust. There's a patent number on the side of the wand.
*An even bigger evil grin* GNYA-HU-HO-HA-HA-HAAAA!
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A copy of "Analytical Engines For Dummies," published 1848. Also, a copy of "Advanced Pandimensional Hypercalculus for Dummies" also
published 1848.
Gee, I wonder what happened to the author?
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A 1/8 scale replica of the Statue of Liberty. It is neon orange and says, "I am your worst nightmare," over and over again.
... You know, some sick and perverted part of me finds this to be utterly fucking hilarious.
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
A large rock onto which a heavy steel anvil is bolted. Both the rock and anvil are time-worn and obviously ancient. The top of the anvil has a long
vertical hole going down in it, as if a long sharp metal rod were once positioned straight-up in it.
No... Fucking... Way...
Quote: You open one of the 995 boxes on this floor and find...
A "Build your own Hypermatrix" Kit. The more you add onto the model, the less of it you can actually see, as it gets translated into the 6th
dimension. Don't put anything inside it if you expect to need it again.
Heh. Now if I ever needed to loose something...
Quote: You open one of the 996 boxes on this floor and find...
Several bottles of VisiCone eyedrops. A few drops in each eye renders the user colorblind, causing everything to look black and white. However, they can
now see in darkness as if they were wearing light-amplification goggles. The drops gradually wear off after 4-6 hours.
Now that is pretty damn keen.
Quote: You open one of the 1002 boxes on this floor and find...
A bug zapper. It's FAR to large to be used on normal insects.
Unless you're someplace like Klendathu, or maybe even Ragol. BRRRRR-ZAP-POW!
Quote: You open one of the 1002 boxes on this floor and find...
A recipe for turning human nose hair and chicken manure into a compact yet powerful explosive.
Do not let Li Kohran see this one!