Another possible answer, considering that we're talking "Friend Computer" here, is "I am that I am."
(You may wish to stand well away from DHBirr, to avoid being hit by some of the lightning he's got coming.)
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Big Brother is watching you. And damn, you are so bloody BORING.
(You may wish to stand well away from DHBirr, to avoid being hit by some of the lightning he's got coming.)
-----
Big Brother is watching you. And damn, you are so bloody BORING.