This has been percolating in my brain for a long time, as something for the "Non-crossovers that should be" thread. But... well, this is just another reminder that life is too short. So:
In a world...
One step removed from FenSpace.
Where an idiot movie-studio exec missed work one day and failed to block the creation of the greatest tourist attraction of the late 20th century.
Where said tourist attraction is about to be torn down due to age and "lack of interest" (nothing to do with soaring real-estate prices and greedy developers, oh no...)
A ragtag group of fen are about to pull off... THE GREAT STARSHIP HEIST.
"Technically, it's not a heist -- we bought it for scrap through a front company. Granted, we will probably get in trouble for not following the removal plan that the Vegas authorities signed off on, but..."
"They'll probably be more pissed about our "hazmat" handling without proper permits."
"Well, that won't be a problem -- it's gone."
"It's WHAT? Three tanker trucks' worth of Handwavium doesn't just vanish! We've been soaking every internal space of the ship that's off-limits to visitors for the past month -- oh. I guess that means it's working?"
"Won't know until it happens. But have you noticed how much more real the animatrons of the crew seem recently? I swear Spock spock'd an eyebrow at me this morning."
"--in a shocking development, the life-size model of the USS Etnerprise, the famous starship from the TV series Star Trek that has been a feature of downtown Las Vegas for the past two decades, has taken flight without warning. Authorities are urging people to stay in their homes--"
"--crowds, no mobs, of people lining the streets and rooftops and cheering -- you can see and hear them behind me -- as this enormous spaceship passes overhead. Despite the danger that this huge ship could fall into the city at any moment, people are--"
"FLY, BABY, FLYYYY!!!!"
"--Air National Guard units scrambled to intercept the, the giant flying model, reported that they were unable to do so as the flying tourist attraction outran them and left the atmosphere. Unconfirmed reports claim that the ANG actually fired on the vessel only to have their weapons miss or bounce off. FBI and DHS sources say that arrest warrants are being issued for--"
"Spock, why... am I... talking... like this?"
"You appear to be a victim of popular stereotyping, Captain."
"Bones?"
"Dammit, Jim, I'm an animatronic tourist attraction who think's he's a doctor, not a robotics engineer!"
"Scotty? Can... you do... something... about this?"
"Weel, I can try, Captain, but I cannae gaurantee anythin'. After all, I'm an engineer, not a speech therapist."
"Later. Mr Sulu?"
"'Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning' -- course laid in, Captain."
"Everyone's a... comedian. Very well... engage."
In a world...
One step removed from FenSpace.
Where an idiot movie-studio exec missed work one day and failed to block the creation of the greatest tourist attraction of the late 20th century.
Where said tourist attraction is about to be torn down due to age and "lack of interest" (nothing to do with soaring real-estate prices and greedy developers, oh no...)
A ragtag group of fen are about to pull off... THE GREAT STARSHIP HEIST.
"Technically, it's not a heist -- we bought it for scrap through a front company. Granted, we will probably get in trouble for not following the removal plan that the Vegas authorities signed off on, but..."
"They'll probably be more pissed about our "hazmat" handling without proper permits."
"Well, that won't be a problem -- it's gone."
"It's WHAT? Three tanker trucks' worth of Handwavium doesn't just vanish! We've been soaking every internal space of the ship that's off-limits to visitors for the past month -- oh. I guess that means it's working?"
"Won't know until it happens. But have you noticed how much more real the animatrons of the crew seem recently? I swear Spock spock'd an eyebrow at me this morning."
"--in a shocking development, the life-size model of the USS Etnerprise, the famous starship from the TV series Star Trek that has been a feature of downtown Las Vegas for the past two decades, has taken flight without warning. Authorities are urging people to stay in their homes--"
"--crowds, no mobs, of people lining the streets and rooftops and cheering -- you can see and hear them behind me -- as this enormous spaceship passes overhead. Despite the danger that this huge ship could fall into the city at any moment, people are--"
"FLY, BABY, FLYYYY!!!!"
"--Air National Guard units scrambled to intercept the, the giant flying model, reported that they were unable to do so as the flying tourist attraction outran them and left the atmosphere. Unconfirmed reports claim that the ANG actually fired on the vessel only to have their weapons miss or bounce off. FBI and DHS sources say that arrest warrants are being issued for--"
"Spock, why... am I... talking... like this?"
"You appear to be a victim of popular stereotyping, Captain."
"Bones?"
"Dammit, Jim, I'm an animatronic tourist attraction who think's he's a doctor, not a robotics engineer!"
"Scotty? Can... you do... something... about this?"
"Weel, I can try, Captain, but I cannae gaurantee anythin'. After all, I'm an engineer, not a speech therapist."
"Later. Mr Sulu?"
"'Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning' -- course laid in, Captain."
"Everyone's a... comedian. Very well... engage."