A quibble. You switch, with no reason that I can see, from past tense — "he said; I asked," etc. — to present about midway through.
Also, if someone says not to open the box, and then gives me a key to the box, I'm going to ask to whom I'm intended to deliver the box (and key), not point out that he told me not to open it.
I'm sorry to say, I didn't quite get Vlad from this. I can see it, a bit, now that you've mentioned it, but the narrative digressions strike me as a bit too airheaded for Vlad unless he's suffering from serious intoxication or blood loss. Maybe he opened the box and, as with that elf Magrat set up, Greebo came snarling out, and now Vlad's life is passing before his eyes and ... YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE TAKEN HIS ADVICE, COUNT SZURKE....
Also, if someone says not to open the box, and then gives me a key to the box, I'm going to ask to whom I'm intended to deliver the box (and key), not point out that he told me not to open it.
I'm sorry to say, I didn't quite get Vlad from this. I can see it, a bit, now that you've mentioned it, but the narrative digressions strike me as a bit too airheaded for Vlad unless he's suffering from serious intoxication or blood loss. Maybe he opened the box and, as with that elf Magrat set up, Greebo came snarling out, and now Vlad's life is passing before his eyes and ... YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE TAKEN HIS ADVICE, COUNT SZURKE....
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"The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this was some killer weed."
"The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this was some killer weed."