RE: [RFC] Being You is Deculture
05-13-2018, 06:41 AM (This post was last modified: 05-16-2018, 04:18 AM by Black Aeronaut.)
05-13-2018, 06:41 AM (This post was last modified: 05-16-2018, 04:18 AM by Black Aeronaut.)
Been too fraggin long.
Have an update of 5,000 words.
It's only now in retrospect that I notice that Roy seems to be absent from the debriefing here. Expect an updated version of that scene to be posted later on, but for now, assume that he's present for that.
The only other thing of note that we did was to have Katherine locate the docking bay they stashed our Valkyries in. It was mildly tricky to pull it off without anyone noticing until they were gone, but by opening a ‘trap door’ beneath them and lowering them with a lift, it was a piece of cake.
Of course, this means I now have a hangar bay for four Valkyries in my C-Space. But I figure that was bound to happen anyhow.
##
“Okay, so we got our Valkyries,” said Max. “Now how do we get on the other ship?”
“Simple,” I said as I began to program in a second ‘low observability’ door. “I just put this door that I’m making on that Meltrandi ship.”
“Meltrandi?” asked Misa.
I nodded. “Meltran is the Zentradi word they use for females.”
“So they really are segregated,” said Misa thoughtfully. “Well then, if we’re going to be stuck on their ship, then we might as well do some intelligence gathering.”
“You sure that’s wise, ma’am?” I asked.
Misa nodded. “I fully intend to not let this whole fiasco be be for nothing, Mr. Grimm. We should gather as much information as we can while we can.”
“Alright, but we gotta play this really Solid Snake style here. And I am not even fucking around. This is literally like playing MGS-3 on European Extreme mode. If any of them see us, game over. You guys get me?”
“Who’s Solid Snake?” asked Misa.
I blinked at her. “You guys don’t have the Metal Gear series?”
“We do,” said Max. “I think LT here is just one of the unwashed.”
“Excuse me!?” replied Misa sharply, causing him to backpedal with his hands up defensively.
I sighed. “Okay, basically? Secret agent BS, and AI-controlled battle movers complete with a nuclear warhead. And European Extreme was the hardest difficulty in the third game. Basically, if any of the enemies even saw you, then the game would end right there. Any further questions?”
Everyone shook their heads.
“Okay, then let’s get this show on the road.”
##
Everyone took what I said to heart and we played things really cagey as we snooped through ventilation ducts, service passages, and equipment trunks, photographing everything of interest while we waited for the Meltrandi ship to defold.
One of the first places we visited was the bridge.
“Wow. I thought that they might be ugly, but some of them look pretty nice,” said Hayao. “Hell, some of them even look kinda cute.”
I nodded at that. “They’re human. Just because they’re fifteen meters tall doesn’t mean they’re going to look any different from us.”
And right then, two females swept into the command blister of the bridge I and signaled for everyone to be quiet.
“Who are they?” whispered Misa.
“The one with the curly hair is Commander Azonia. She’s good. Her unit is an elite unit even among the Meltrans, who are typically used as strategic units.”
“Who’s the one talking with her?” asked Max. “She’s beautiful.”
“Yeah, that’d be Milia Fallyna. She’s an ace and easily our rival. She’s an honest to god prodigy. My advice to you guys is that if we ever come across her, leave her to either Max or myself. She’s so good that I’m not even very keen on facing her myself - I’d rather stall for time until Max can get to her.”
“Why me?” asked Max. “I mean, I know I’m good, but am I really the only guy that can go toe-to-toe with her?”
I nodded. “She’s all that and then some. And you being able to keep track of multiple targets means that you’re the only one who can keep her occupied.”
Max nodded. “Sounds like it’d be kinda fun to go up against her.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll get your shot at her. Let’s keep moving.”
##
Shortly thereafter, we found the Queadluun Rau bay.
“What are those things?” asked Hikaru in a hushed whisper.
“Queadluun-Rau. They’re high maneuverability battle suits used only by Meltrandi because only the females have the reaction times to handle them. They’re incredibly fast and nimble, but very lightly armored. They pack a helluva punch, though. Those blisters above the shoulders and at the knees? Missile pods. Each one packs a couple dozen micro-missiles that are every bit as maneuverable as the Rau itself.
A female operations technician was busy making one of the Rau’s ready. And then a door at the end of the bay opened, admitting Milia herself, wearing the intricate flight suit needed for piloting the Rau.
Misa frowned and said, “If she’s here getting ready to sortie, then we must be getting close. We need to get ready.”
I nodded. “Right, let’s go.”
##
The idea was simple. Set the hangar bay doors to appear outside the hull of Azonia’s ship, blow the emergency opening, letting the decompression flush us out with our Valkyries, and then make for the SDF-1 on full burner.
The only snag was that we were plus one LT who did not have a ship of her own anymore. And no one had the two-seat D-model.
“Well,” I said, “it’ll be a tight fit, but Hikaru is small enough that the two of you should be able to fit in the cockpit together.”
“What!? Why me?”
“Hikaru. Out of all of us you’re the smallest.” It was one of those obvious things that no one really ever thought about. While everyone kept track of the leaderboards for kills and missions completed, few of us ever really called any attention to superficial things like height.
“Oh alright,” grumbled Hikaru. “Ma’am, I promise that I’ll be an absolute gentleman about this.”
“You’d better, Ensign,” replied Misa, though with the same coy smile that she wore when she was in his Valkyrie’s hand before. “Or else I might actually have Roy put you to work for me.”
Hayao, Max, and I all subtly exchanged knowing smiles at that.
##
We sat, waiting for the moment that the skirmish would start and provide the fog of war we needed to make our escape.
What was strange was that now we had Katherine patched into our tactical net.
This was a first for me, hearing her girlish voice in my headset.
“Okay everyone, they’re launching their battlepods!” she announced for everyone to hear. “I’m gonna shift the doors and blow them open in ten seconds. Get ready!”
We all set our engines to maximum military power, just like as if we were getting ready for a catapult launch. Except that we had wheel brakes locked hard, keeping our birds rooted to the spot. It would be up to us to release the brake on time to get the most out of this stunt.
Katherine gave us all the countdown.
“...3... 2... 1...” suddenly, the hangar doors snapped open and the air turned white as the water content suddenly crystallized into ice-dust. “GO! GO! GO!”
And then we were away! It was amazing that we went unnoticed for a whole minute until the Gnerl and Battle Pod pilots began to take notice.
Not that we were interested in a fight. Everyone was dry on ammo, though I still had 22 rounds in my gun pod.
“Don’t engage! Just keep burning!” Hikaru called out. “Robber, you got us covered?”
“Like a mother hen, Fuzzy!”
Fortunately, I only had to make examples out of one or two of them, and even then I merely wounded their machines with grazing strikes using my lasers.
Honestly, I was sick of killing. These were people for Tsunami’s sake. Misguided, yes. But still very much people. And I wanted as many of these people to come to our side - to join us and take joy in life.
Yes, many of them would still want to fight. But I would do what I can to push for them to have the option to remain as soldiers. Fighting was in their blood. They craved confrontation. We just needed to give them ways to blow off their steam when frustration begins to take their toll on them.
“FUZZY! ROBBER! IS THAT YOU!?” came Roy’s voice over the tactical net all the sudden, cutting off my thoughts.
“Sure is, Mother!” called back Hikaru, every bit as elated. “We even have the LT here with us!”
“Hot DAMN you guys are a sight for sore eyes! Gunsight, Skull Squadron Actual - RED WING HAS RETURNED!”
##
The excitement was palpable, even in the vacuum of the Prometheus’s hangar decks. But once we all made it into the locker rooms, we all got dogpiled by our fellow pilots. Back slapping, rough hair rustling, and shoulder punching abounded as we were all cheered. It wasn’t just that we were heroes once again.
More than that, everyone was simply glad to have us all back.
“CAPTAIN ON DECK!” someone sounded off and then everyone snapped to attention as Captain Gloval made his way briskly towards us.
“At ease! At ease everyone of you!” He suddenly took me by the shoulders. “вот тебе и на! (vot tebe i na!)” he cried out happily then laughed heartily as he pulled me into a back-slapping manly hug fit for the Russian he was. He then went and did the same to Hikaru, Max, and Hayao all in turn.
“You crazy young men! I had a feeling you would all set the world on fire! Now, there is much to be done. You all must be debriefed, and I am thinking that we should do this very quickly, for there is a certain little lady that I fear will start tearing through the bulkheads to get back to you, Mr. Grimm!”
With that, everyone in the locker room erupted into gleeful jeering as everyone in range began smack my back and tousle my hair.
“CRADLE ROBBER!” they all called out.
The captain then raised his hands and everyone fell silent.
“GENTLEMEN!” he called out to us. “I want you all cleaned up and in your best uniforms. You are to be at Headquarters in thirty minutes for debriefing! MOVE!”
No one needed to be told twice. A great hooting and hollering broke out as everyone made way for us so we could hit the showers first.
##
It was just like the thing with the Zentradi prisoners all over again. Only this time, Claudia was present as the person to make a record of the debrief as Misa was intractably apart of this incident.
“So,” said Captain Gloval as he bade everyone to have their seats. “Where to begin? The last we knew of you, you had all vanished from our line of sight and we detected one of their ships folding out.”
“Much has happened, sir,” replied Misa Hayase solemnly. “But before we get into anything else, Ensign Grimm has something that he needs to disclose. And sirs... Before he does, I would advise that this matter be kept classified on a need-to-know basis. And also, you need to keep an open mind about what he is about to tell you. It... it’s very big.”
Gloval looked curious. Maistrof looked like he was about to explode. But Captain Edmund Duke raised an eyebrow and said,
“Boy, what in tarnation have you been up to?”
I sighed, knowing that there was no easy way of doing this.
“Sirs, I’m an interdimensional traveler. A slider.”
For a moment, the only sounds were the faint noise of air circulating through the vents overhead and the deep, almost subliminal thrum of the ship itself.
“You what?” said Duke.
“Probably better that I show you, sirs.” I then tapped out the command on my C-Pod, and the door to my C-Space appeared. “Who wants coffee?”
##
I had to call up a few more chairs. Maistrof, predictably, damn near exploded in outrage and had to spend some time outside cooling off.
Gloval was utterly and genuinely bemused. After everything he’d been through lately, what more was a slider being right there in their midst, and fighting as one of their own.
Duke, on the other hand...
He simply shook his head and took it all in stride with that southern pragmatism.
“Alright then, so let me get this all straight. Yer from a whole different kinda Earth, got adopted by some alien empire so yer technically a goddamn prince, ya got yerself four women waiting back home fer ya (oh lordy is that ever gonna go over like a lead balloon!) and on toppa all ‘at you got yerself some superpowers.
“Did I miss anything, son?”
“Sir, his knowledge of things that are going to happen,” said Misa.
Duke shook his head. “Christ on a crutch, son. I think that’s the worst one of all. How we gonna explain all this craziness to the boys back in Anchorage?”
“Sir,” said Misa. “My father is a member of the Admiralty board. I have credibility, and I can vouch for Mr. Grimm personally. He has been doing the very best he can for us.”
“Right, right, an' all without upsettin’ the apple cart. I know, Lieutenant. Problem is them boys in the Admiralty ain’t gonna see it that way.”
“Maybe so,” said Captain Gloval, breaking his silence. “But what would they do? Trump up charges against him? Whether they like it or not, Mr. Grimm is already a war hero on par with our own Mr. Fokker. A coverup like that would be far too blatant. Too many questions would be asked. Questions that cannot be pushed aside so easily with a statement of ‘No comment’. Many of these men have political careers to think about, and damming a war hero in such a way would not bring favor from any of their constituents.”
Duke grunted at that. “I see yer point, Commodore. Don’t mean it don’t worry me none. Ass holes like that got ways to lean on people. Bad ways. Our boy here may have been hiding things from us, but it weren’t outta malice. I can even understand why the boy’d keep something like this under his hat. For god’s sakes, I’m drinking coffee that was grown by a buncha goddamn technicolor ponies. And god help me, this is some damn good shit, son. I wish you had a way of getting a supply line on this fer the Officer’s Wardroom. Make some of our days a helluva lot more tolerable.
With that, I made a ‘wait one’ gesture, went to the replicator, and paged through the menu before making my selection.
A five pound can of coffee grounds resolved in the alcove, which I then took and handed off to Captain Duke.
“That should be every bit as good as the original,” I explained.
The Captain just shook his head. “Son, you are something else, you know that?”
I smiled wryly at that. “I try, sir.”
“Well,” said Captain Gloval, “I think it’s best we moved on. We already covered the basics of what happened. Now I think it is best we got the details straight. Miz Hayase, what strength would you say this fleet is at?”
“Sir, there could have easily have been over a hundred-thousand ships in that fleet, perhaps even more, and what’s more is that there is a distinct implication that there are hundreds of such fleets roaming the galaxy at large.”
Duke snorted. “As if them damn politicians are gonna think ahead on this. Dumbasses are all in the pockets of those fuck-head industrial consortiums buildin’ them damn Grand Canons. Fat lotta good that’s gonna do us. If what you said is true, it won’t matter if we cover the whole damn planet with them things. They just blow the whole world to smithereens after we piss them off.”
Gloval nodded. “Hence Mr. Grimm’s idea of a cultural assault.”
Duke scoffed in amusement. “Commodore, if that shit works, I will give my hat to Miss Minmei and have her cook it for me so I can eat it.”
“It’s not going to be enough,” said Maistroff stiffly from the entrance of my C-space, which I had left open for his benefit. He then came and took a seat in one of the easy chairs I had brought out. “Even if it is successful, I believe there are still going to be a good number of units that will remain loyal to their central authority.
“Make no mistake of it, gentlemen: Earth is doomed. It’s not a matter of if, but when and how badly.”
“So what in tarnation you gonna have us do about it?”
“This girl that is infatuated with Mr. Grim? She has family in Yokohama. I have some diplomatic contacts at the British embassy in Juban. Once we reach Earth, it won’t be hard for me to call in a few favors. We can get that girl out to see her family... And meanwhile, Mr. Grimm can pass on the information that everyone needs to know.”
“You make this sound as though getting her to see her family will be problematic in the first place, Colonel.”
“It will be,” replied Maistroff. “I know how these men think. Imagine what it must have been like when we folded out, taking the entire island and a good bit of the Pacific Ocean with it. At the very least there would have been a tsunami. People will want to know why there was one and why suddenly South Ataria Island no longer exists.
“Gentlemen: It is clear from the recent actions of High Command that we have been written off as dead.”
“He’s right,” said Captain Duke quietly. “And knowing those bastards they’re gonna want to keep us that way. Which will mean no contact with the public at large.”
“Hmmm,” replied Captain Gloval, deep in thought. “I see your point, gentlemen. So, they’ve locked the door and pulled in the welcome mat as well. You believe you had an ‘in’ with the British Embassy, Colonel?”
“After a fashion. The United Kingdom’s ambassador to Japan is none other than my father.”
“Well, ‘at’ll do the trick alright,” remarked Captain Duke. “That just leaves the question: what can the folks back home do about this mess?”
Maistroff nodded. “Those weapons they used... judging by the effect they had on that tundra planet, it was like a mass bombardment of airburst nuclear weapons. And I know what I am talking about. I was an officer at Strategic Command at the very height of the Cold War.
“If this really is the case, then we may have a chance. People can build shelters. They can survive this. And once it is all over, we can start rebuilding.”
Captain Gloval nodded thoughtfully. “Indeed. I myself remember these things from the side of the Soviets. Many terrible ideas. Horrible ones. How ironic is it now that the apocalypse will not come from us bombing each other into stray molecules, but instead from an alien race with long-dead masters?
“Gentlemen, I think we’ve carried on long enough. We have deliberations to discuss and plans to make. Let us turn our boys and girl loose so they can enjoy themselves. Perhaps a 72 hour pass?”
“At the gahdamned least,” replied Captain Duke. “Alright kids. Y’all get the hell outta here an try not to paint too much of the town red.”
“Uhm, sirs?” I said diffidently. When they all looked to me, I looked meaningfully around. Fortunately they all caught on.
Maistroff gave Duke a savage grin. “Telling the man that invited you into his own home to ‘get the hell out’? So much for Southern Hospitality.”
“Aw cannit ya damn limey Brit.”
##
And just like that, we were all whisked away while still in our best uniforms to the amphitheater where the Miss Macross Pageant had been held. We were all stood up before the crowd of civilians, and our return was cheered triumphantly. As I looked out into the crowd, though, I saw a trio of familiar faces.
“Hoi, LT!” I said quietly to Misa as I subtly nudged her. “Check out who’s in the audience - eight rows from the front, five columns from our left.”
“What are you...” said Misa, but trailed off as she spotted our friends, Dosel, Nantes, and Bromco. “Them!?” she hissed, barely keeping herself from crying out loud.
I then grinned mischievously. “Let’s round them up for the after party, huh?”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea, Lieutenant?” she asked archly, using my not-as-of-yet-official rank.
“Positive. You saw the recording I made of my last conversation with Breetai - they’re here to see if I was lying or not. Let’s show them just how much of a lie it was.”
We were cut off at that moment as Minmei was suddenly introduced. She came in from stage-right, carrying bouquets of red roses. She first handed one to Misa, shaking hands with her and welcoming her back.
And then she skipped over me.
This confused the hell out of everyone as they all began to think to themselves, ‘Hey, waituhmintue! That’s not how the script goes!’ However, I was the only one that saw her give me a mischievous wink and grin as she passed by, so I already knew she was up to something here.
Hikaru was next, though instead of a handshake, he got a chaste kiss on the cheek that set him to blushing furiously, and the crowd practically screamed in both amusement and outrage.
Max and Hayao both got the same treatment, making them both radiate bemusement as the crowed cheerfully jeered them and tossed out halfhearted threats of emasculation.
But then, Minmei came back to me, and without a word she pulled me down into a very spirited and steamy kiss. I upped the ante by dipping her as we kissed, almost reenacting that infamous kiss a sailor gave to a nurse in New York City on Victory Day.
Utter pandemonium ensued.
If the act hadn’t been something so innocuous, then a hard nosed cop might have arrested her for inciting a riot. People screamed all kinds of things at me. Cradle Robber. Lucky Dog. Bastard. Lucky Bastard. Even ‘pedophile’ got thrown out by a few that really wanted to make their point clear. But that, by far, was the smallest minority.
It’s a foregone conclusion that Minmei had staked her claim on me. This simply put all the rumors to rest.
“I missed you,” she whispered in my ear as we broke the kiss and simply held each other.
“Missed you too. Sorry about this.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.”
She then pulled away, but not before giving me one last impish peck on the cheek, and then left me with my own bouquet before stepping to the side and announcing that she would welcome us home with her break-out single, My Boyfriend is a Pilot.
Before, people had thought that the song was just pure metaphor. But now everyone knew for certain that she meant every word of a song about her boyfriend, and how he’d fly so gracefully that she would sometimes wonder if he loved his plane more than her.
Of course, everyone knew better, but it was understandable that a girl does sometimes wonder - even if in a humorous, self-deprecating manner.
Immediately after Minmei bowed, Roy Fokker came out in his best uniform, as he had the distinct honor of frocking us all.
Misa Hayase was promoted from Lieutenant Junior-Grade to Lieutenant.
Myself and Hikaru from Ensign to Lieutenant Junior-Grade.
Max was awarded a meteoric promotion to Ensign.
But Hayao remained an enlisted man with a promotion to Petty-Officer, Second-Class. He was happy enough with that, though, as just being in charge of his own plane and its support crew was responsibility enough, thank you very much!
And after one more performance by Minmei, we were about to all be shuffled off, but I stayed the hands of the ushers, jumping into the crowd, Misa following me closely, and Hikaru not far behind even though he didn’t know what was going on.
Everyone parted way for us, though a few wanted to shake my hand. I had to pass on that because this had to be done fast.
“Hoi! Dosel! Nantes! Bromco!”
The three Zentraedi intelligence agents went white as sheets as I called them out by name. I just smiled at them.
“C’mon you guys! You gotta be hungry, right?”
The three looked at each other and shrugged, no doubt recalling the last time they had enjoyed their time on board our ship, which admittedly had been a surprisingly comfortable experience for them, all things considered.
They all came over and joined us as we were hustled out en mass to the back exit where a limousine waited for us.
“You guys!?” cried out Hikaru in surprise. “How did you get here?”
“Classified!” cried out Dosel. Hikaru rolled his eyes.
Misa picked up the thread, though. “You were all sent here to spy on us, right?”
“Uh, maybe?” replied Nantes sheepishly, earning a sharp look from the others as we all piled into the limo.
“Guys, it’s alright,” I said once I made sure the window between us and the driver was closed. “I want to help you.”
“What!?” cried out Dosel, aghast. “You’d commit treason to help us?”
“It’s not treasonous to help you understand our culture,” I replied.
“Yeah,” said Hayao, who’d seen the recording along with the others. “You guys are just here to see if Cradle Robber was lying or not.”
“Ah guys?” said Minmei plaintively. “What’s going on?”
We all blinked as we suddenly realized that there was a civilian amongst us.
“Hooo boy. Sir?” I asked, looking to Roy, who was in on the whole thing anyhow, having been there for my rather remarkable debriefing.
Roy shrugged. “Can’t hurt anyhow,” he replied. “If they’re gonna learn about our culture, then it can’t hurt if they’re friends with Miss Macross herself.”
Minmei blushed at that appellation.
“Right then,” I said. “Minmei, I want you to meet Loli Dosel, Conda Bromco, and Warrera Nantes. They’re the three Zentraedi Hikaru and I captured a while back, and they’ve been sent back to learn more about us.” I then looked to the three Zentraedi. “Guys, this is the girl I mentioned before during our questioning - this is Lynn Minmei, my girlfriend.”
“So... males and females really do live together?” said Bromco, still reeling from the experiences they’d been through.
“What?” said Minmei in surprise. “You guys don’t!?”
“Yeah, they’re segregated by gender,” I said. “Probably cuts down on so-called ‘distractions’.”
“I’ll say it’s a distraction!” said Dosel. “How do you guys even function?”
Minmei grinned. “Practice.”
The rest of us laughed at the incredibly dead-on quip, further confusing the three Zentraedi.
##
It wasn’t long, of course, until we were pulling up in-front of the Nyan-Nyan.
It was just one of those things, you know. It was so natural. Everyone simply knew this to be. It was so pervasive that once word got around, Mr. Truent, without it being requested of him, cleared Minmei’s schedule for the next three days and set to work on getting everything back into line. So pervasive that once word got out, people began showing up at the Nyan-Nyan. Some bore gifts: flowers, cards, some candies and treats. Others pitched in to help with the sudden onset of decoration for the party.
The party that was entirely expected to happen. The one that every Valkyrie pilot and a good number of Destroid jockeys all showed up to without even being asked, but were welcomed anyhow.
The party in our honor that we showed up to, knowing full well that was going on without ever being told about it by anyone.
It was simply a fact of life here in Macross City.
We walked into the Nyan-Nyan.
Everyone cheered as I reenacted the kiss Minmei and I had earlier, sweeping her off her feet once more. Claudia was already there waiting and joined us the moment we entered, giving Roy a kiss to rival the one Minmei and I shared, provoking an equal measure of cheers.
Then the eleven of us; Roy, Claudia, Hikaru, Misa, Max, Hayao, Loli, Condo, Warrera, Minmei, and me; sat down together at a table, Minmei practically sharing one space at the table with me, and the festivities commenced with a great feast.
To say the least, we were all treated to the sight of three Zentraedi who’ve never enjoyed ‘real food’ before, have their minds completely and utterly blown.
##
That night, Roy assured me that he’d look after our three new friends for the night... after which he’d make sure that they made things right by helping to fix the damage they’d done to the locker room they broke into and become gainfully employed.
As for me...
Minmei dragged me up to her room. No one said a word. If anything happened, it was fine by everyone else. This was a special occasion, after all - I and my compatriots had practically come back from the dead. Auntie, in fact, shoved a few condoms into my hands, making it clear she didn’t want to explain any pregnancies out of wedlock to her in-laws, and causing Minmei to snicker wickedly at my humiliation.
However, nothing happened. Minmei slipped into her pajamas. I put on my own (she had tucked a set of mine away in her room once she heard I was coming home).
We didn’t even really say much. She simply pulled me down into her bed with her and we kissed for a time, carefully restraining ourselves despite what we both knew what we really wanted. And I knew she wanted to. It was hard to miss from the way she wrapped herself around me. But she held true to her word: until I put a wedding band on her finger, then I was out of luck. And her as well, it would seem.
But that was fine. It was good to wait.
We slowly deescalated, banking the fires of passion in favor of a steady and comforting warmth of simply being together as we slowly drifted off to sleep.
Let me tell you, I wouldn't want to wish that level of temptation on -anyone-.
Have an update of 5,000 words.
It's only now in retrospect that I notice that Roy seems to be absent from the debriefing here. Expect an updated version of that scene to be posted later on, but for now, assume that he's present for that.
The only other thing of note that we did was to have Katherine locate the docking bay they stashed our Valkyries in. It was mildly tricky to pull it off without anyone noticing until they were gone, but by opening a ‘trap door’ beneath them and lowering them with a lift, it was a piece of cake.
Of course, this means I now have a hangar bay for four Valkyries in my C-Space. But I figure that was bound to happen anyhow.
##
“Okay, so we got our Valkyries,” said Max. “Now how do we get on the other ship?”
“Simple,” I said as I began to program in a second ‘low observability’ door. “I just put this door that I’m making on that Meltrandi ship.”
“Meltrandi?” asked Misa.
I nodded. “Meltran is the Zentradi word they use for females.”
“So they really are segregated,” said Misa thoughtfully. “Well then, if we’re going to be stuck on their ship, then we might as well do some intelligence gathering.”
“You sure that’s wise, ma’am?” I asked.
Misa nodded. “I fully intend to not let this whole fiasco be be for nothing, Mr. Grimm. We should gather as much information as we can while we can.”
“Alright, but we gotta play this really Solid Snake style here. And I am not even fucking around. This is literally like playing MGS-3 on European Extreme mode. If any of them see us, game over. You guys get me?”
“Who’s Solid Snake?” asked Misa.
I blinked at her. “You guys don’t have the Metal Gear series?”
“We do,” said Max. “I think LT here is just one of the unwashed.”
“Excuse me!?” replied Misa sharply, causing him to backpedal with his hands up defensively.
I sighed. “Okay, basically? Secret agent BS, and AI-controlled battle movers complete with a nuclear warhead. And European Extreme was the hardest difficulty in the third game. Basically, if any of the enemies even saw you, then the game would end right there. Any further questions?”
Everyone shook their heads.
“Okay, then let’s get this show on the road.”
##
Everyone took what I said to heart and we played things really cagey as we snooped through ventilation ducts, service passages, and equipment trunks, photographing everything of interest while we waited for the Meltrandi ship to defold.
One of the first places we visited was the bridge.
“Wow. I thought that they might be ugly, but some of them look pretty nice,” said Hayao. “Hell, some of them even look kinda cute.”
I nodded at that. “They’re human. Just because they’re fifteen meters tall doesn’t mean they’re going to look any different from us.”
And right then, two females swept into the command blister of the bridge I and signaled for everyone to be quiet.
“Who are they?” whispered Misa.
“The one with the curly hair is Commander Azonia. She’s good. Her unit is an elite unit even among the Meltrans, who are typically used as strategic units.”
“Who’s the one talking with her?” asked Max. “She’s beautiful.”
“Yeah, that’d be Milia Fallyna. She’s an ace and easily our rival. She’s an honest to god prodigy. My advice to you guys is that if we ever come across her, leave her to either Max or myself. She’s so good that I’m not even very keen on facing her myself - I’d rather stall for time until Max can get to her.”
“Why me?” asked Max. “I mean, I know I’m good, but am I really the only guy that can go toe-to-toe with her?”
I nodded. “She’s all that and then some. And you being able to keep track of multiple targets means that you’re the only one who can keep her occupied.”
Max nodded. “Sounds like it’d be kinda fun to go up against her.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll get your shot at her. Let’s keep moving.”
##
Shortly thereafter, we found the Queadluun Rau bay.
“What are those things?” asked Hikaru in a hushed whisper.
“Queadluun-Rau. They’re high maneuverability battle suits used only by Meltrandi because only the females have the reaction times to handle them. They’re incredibly fast and nimble, but very lightly armored. They pack a helluva punch, though. Those blisters above the shoulders and at the knees? Missile pods. Each one packs a couple dozen micro-missiles that are every bit as maneuverable as the Rau itself.
A female operations technician was busy making one of the Rau’s ready. And then a door at the end of the bay opened, admitting Milia herself, wearing the intricate flight suit needed for piloting the Rau.
Misa frowned and said, “If she’s here getting ready to sortie, then we must be getting close. We need to get ready.”
I nodded. “Right, let’s go.”
##
The idea was simple. Set the hangar bay doors to appear outside the hull of Azonia’s ship, blow the emergency opening, letting the decompression flush us out with our Valkyries, and then make for the SDF-1 on full burner.
The only snag was that we were plus one LT who did not have a ship of her own anymore. And no one had the two-seat D-model.
“Well,” I said, “it’ll be a tight fit, but Hikaru is small enough that the two of you should be able to fit in the cockpit together.”
“What!? Why me?”
“Hikaru. Out of all of us you’re the smallest.” It was one of those obvious things that no one really ever thought about. While everyone kept track of the leaderboards for kills and missions completed, few of us ever really called any attention to superficial things like height.
“Oh alright,” grumbled Hikaru. “Ma’am, I promise that I’ll be an absolute gentleman about this.”
“You’d better, Ensign,” replied Misa, though with the same coy smile that she wore when she was in his Valkyrie’s hand before. “Or else I might actually have Roy put you to work for me.”
Hayao, Max, and I all subtly exchanged knowing smiles at that.
##
We sat, waiting for the moment that the skirmish would start and provide the fog of war we needed to make our escape.
What was strange was that now we had Katherine patched into our tactical net.
This was a first for me, hearing her girlish voice in my headset.
“Okay everyone, they’re launching their battlepods!” she announced for everyone to hear. “I’m gonna shift the doors and blow them open in ten seconds. Get ready!”
We all set our engines to maximum military power, just like as if we were getting ready for a catapult launch. Except that we had wheel brakes locked hard, keeping our birds rooted to the spot. It would be up to us to release the brake on time to get the most out of this stunt.
Katherine gave us all the countdown.
“...3... 2... 1...” suddenly, the hangar doors snapped open and the air turned white as the water content suddenly crystallized into ice-dust. “GO! GO! GO!”
And then we were away! It was amazing that we went unnoticed for a whole minute until the Gnerl and Battle Pod pilots began to take notice.
Not that we were interested in a fight. Everyone was dry on ammo, though I still had 22 rounds in my gun pod.
“Don’t engage! Just keep burning!” Hikaru called out. “Robber, you got us covered?”
“Like a mother hen, Fuzzy!”
Fortunately, I only had to make examples out of one or two of them, and even then I merely wounded their machines with grazing strikes using my lasers.
Honestly, I was sick of killing. These were people for Tsunami’s sake. Misguided, yes. But still very much people. And I wanted as many of these people to come to our side - to join us and take joy in life.
Yes, many of them would still want to fight. But I would do what I can to push for them to have the option to remain as soldiers. Fighting was in their blood. They craved confrontation. We just needed to give them ways to blow off their steam when frustration begins to take their toll on them.
“FUZZY! ROBBER! IS THAT YOU!?” came Roy’s voice over the tactical net all the sudden, cutting off my thoughts.
“Sure is, Mother!” called back Hikaru, every bit as elated. “We even have the LT here with us!”
“Hot DAMN you guys are a sight for sore eyes! Gunsight, Skull Squadron Actual - RED WING HAS RETURNED!”
##
The excitement was palpable, even in the vacuum of the Prometheus’s hangar decks. But once we all made it into the locker rooms, we all got dogpiled by our fellow pilots. Back slapping, rough hair rustling, and shoulder punching abounded as we were all cheered. It wasn’t just that we were heroes once again.
More than that, everyone was simply glad to have us all back.
“CAPTAIN ON DECK!” someone sounded off and then everyone snapped to attention as Captain Gloval made his way briskly towards us.
“At ease! At ease everyone of you!” He suddenly took me by the shoulders. “вот тебе и на! (vot tebe i na!)” he cried out happily then laughed heartily as he pulled me into a back-slapping manly hug fit for the Russian he was. He then went and did the same to Hikaru, Max, and Hayao all in turn.
“You crazy young men! I had a feeling you would all set the world on fire! Now, there is much to be done. You all must be debriefed, and I am thinking that we should do this very quickly, for there is a certain little lady that I fear will start tearing through the bulkheads to get back to you, Mr. Grimm!”
With that, everyone in the locker room erupted into gleeful jeering as everyone in range began smack my back and tousle my hair.
“CRADLE ROBBER!” they all called out.
The captain then raised his hands and everyone fell silent.
“GENTLEMEN!” he called out to us. “I want you all cleaned up and in your best uniforms. You are to be at Headquarters in thirty minutes for debriefing! MOVE!”
No one needed to be told twice. A great hooting and hollering broke out as everyone made way for us so we could hit the showers first.
##
It was just like the thing with the Zentradi prisoners all over again. Only this time, Claudia was present as the person to make a record of the debrief as Misa was intractably apart of this incident.
“So,” said Captain Gloval as he bade everyone to have their seats. “Where to begin? The last we knew of you, you had all vanished from our line of sight and we detected one of their ships folding out.”
“Much has happened, sir,” replied Misa Hayase solemnly. “But before we get into anything else, Ensign Grimm has something that he needs to disclose. And sirs... Before he does, I would advise that this matter be kept classified on a need-to-know basis. And also, you need to keep an open mind about what he is about to tell you. It... it’s very big.”
Gloval looked curious. Maistrof looked like he was about to explode. But Captain Edmund Duke raised an eyebrow and said,
“Boy, what in tarnation have you been up to?”
I sighed, knowing that there was no easy way of doing this.
“Sirs, I’m an interdimensional traveler. A slider.”
For a moment, the only sounds were the faint noise of air circulating through the vents overhead and the deep, almost subliminal thrum of the ship itself.
“You what?” said Duke.
“Probably better that I show you, sirs.” I then tapped out the command on my C-Pod, and the door to my C-Space appeared. “Who wants coffee?”
##
I had to call up a few more chairs. Maistrof, predictably, damn near exploded in outrage and had to spend some time outside cooling off.
Gloval was utterly and genuinely bemused. After everything he’d been through lately, what more was a slider being right there in their midst, and fighting as one of their own.
Duke, on the other hand...
He simply shook his head and took it all in stride with that southern pragmatism.
“Alright then, so let me get this all straight. Yer from a whole different kinda Earth, got adopted by some alien empire so yer technically a goddamn prince, ya got yerself four women waiting back home fer ya (oh lordy is that ever gonna go over like a lead balloon!) and on toppa all ‘at you got yerself some superpowers.
“Did I miss anything, son?”
“Sir, his knowledge of things that are going to happen,” said Misa.
Duke shook his head. “Christ on a crutch, son. I think that’s the worst one of all. How we gonna explain all this craziness to the boys back in Anchorage?”
“Sir,” said Misa. “My father is a member of the Admiralty board. I have credibility, and I can vouch for Mr. Grimm personally. He has been doing the very best he can for us.”
“Right, right, an' all without upsettin’ the apple cart. I know, Lieutenant. Problem is them boys in the Admiralty ain’t gonna see it that way.”
“Maybe so,” said Captain Gloval, breaking his silence. “But what would they do? Trump up charges against him? Whether they like it or not, Mr. Grimm is already a war hero on par with our own Mr. Fokker. A coverup like that would be far too blatant. Too many questions would be asked. Questions that cannot be pushed aside so easily with a statement of ‘No comment’. Many of these men have political careers to think about, and damming a war hero in such a way would not bring favor from any of their constituents.”
Duke grunted at that. “I see yer point, Commodore. Don’t mean it don’t worry me none. Ass holes like that got ways to lean on people. Bad ways. Our boy here may have been hiding things from us, but it weren’t outta malice. I can even understand why the boy’d keep something like this under his hat. For god’s sakes, I’m drinking coffee that was grown by a buncha goddamn technicolor ponies. And god help me, this is some damn good shit, son. I wish you had a way of getting a supply line on this fer the Officer’s Wardroom. Make some of our days a helluva lot more tolerable.
With that, I made a ‘wait one’ gesture, went to the replicator, and paged through the menu before making my selection.
A five pound can of coffee grounds resolved in the alcove, which I then took and handed off to Captain Duke.
“That should be every bit as good as the original,” I explained.
The Captain just shook his head. “Son, you are something else, you know that?”
I smiled wryly at that. “I try, sir.”
“Well,” said Captain Gloval, “I think it’s best we moved on. We already covered the basics of what happened. Now I think it is best we got the details straight. Miz Hayase, what strength would you say this fleet is at?”
“Sir, there could have easily have been over a hundred-thousand ships in that fleet, perhaps even more, and what’s more is that there is a distinct implication that there are hundreds of such fleets roaming the galaxy at large.”
Duke snorted. “As if them damn politicians are gonna think ahead on this. Dumbasses are all in the pockets of those fuck-head industrial consortiums buildin’ them damn Grand Canons. Fat lotta good that’s gonna do us. If what you said is true, it won’t matter if we cover the whole damn planet with them things. They just blow the whole world to smithereens after we piss them off.”
Gloval nodded. “Hence Mr. Grimm’s idea of a cultural assault.”
Duke scoffed in amusement. “Commodore, if that shit works, I will give my hat to Miss Minmei and have her cook it for me so I can eat it.”
“It’s not going to be enough,” said Maistroff stiffly from the entrance of my C-space, which I had left open for his benefit. He then came and took a seat in one of the easy chairs I had brought out. “Even if it is successful, I believe there are still going to be a good number of units that will remain loyal to their central authority.
“Make no mistake of it, gentlemen: Earth is doomed. It’s not a matter of if, but when and how badly.”
“So what in tarnation you gonna have us do about it?”
“This girl that is infatuated with Mr. Grim? She has family in Yokohama. I have some diplomatic contacts at the British embassy in Juban. Once we reach Earth, it won’t be hard for me to call in a few favors. We can get that girl out to see her family... And meanwhile, Mr. Grimm can pass on the information that everyone needs to know.”
“You make this sound as though getting her to see her family will be problematic in the first place, Colonel.”
“It will be,” replied Maistroff. “I know how these men think. Imagine what it must have been like when we folded out, taking the entire island and a good bit of the Pacific Ocean with it. At the very least there would have been a tsunami. People will want to know why there was one and why suddenly South Ataria Island no longer exists.
“Gentlemen: It is clear from the recent actions of High Command that we have been written off as dead.”
“He’s right,” said Captain Duke quietly. “And knowing those bastards they’re gonna want to keep us that way. Which will mean no contact with the public at large.”
“Hmmm,” replied Captain Gloval, deep in thought. “I see your point, gentlemen. So, they’ve locked the door and pulled in the welcome mat as well. You believe you had an ‘in’ with the British Embassy, Colonel?”
“After a fashion. The United Kingdom’s ambassador to Japan is none other than my father.”
“Well, ‘at’ll do the trick alright,” remarked Captain Duke. “That just leaves the question: what can the folks back home do about this mess?”
Maistroff nodded. “Those weapons they used... judging by the effect they had on that tundra planet, it was like a mass bombardment of airburst nuclear weapons. And I know what I am talking about. I was an officer at Strategic Command at the very height of the Cold War.
“If this really is the case, then we may have a chance. People can build shelters. They can survive this. And once it is all over, we can start rebuilding.”
Captain Gloval nodded thoughtfully. “Indeed. I myself remember these things from the side of the Soviets. Many terrible ideas. Horrible ones. How ironic is it now that the apocalypse will not come from us bombing each other into stray molecules, but instead from an alien race with long-dead masters?
“Gentlemen, I think we’ve carried on long enough. We have deliberations to discuss and plans to make. Let us turn our boys and girl loose so they can enjoy themselves. Perhaps a 72 hour pass?”
“At the gahdamned least,” replied Captain Duke. “Alright kids. Y’all get the hell outta here an try not to paint too much of the town red.”
“Uhm, sirs?” I said diffidently. When they all looked to me, I looked meaningfully around. Fortunately they all caught on.
Maistroff gave Duke a savage grin. “Telling the man that invited you into his own home to ‘get the hell out’? So much for Southern Hospitality.”
“Aw cannit ya damn limey Brit.”
##
And just like that, we were all whisked away while still in our best uniforms to the amphitheater where the Miss Macross Pageant had been held. We were all stood up before the crowd of civilians, and our return was cheered triumphantly. As I looked out into the crowd, though, I saw a trio of familiar faces.
“Hoi, LT!” I said quietly to Misa as I subtly nudged her. “Check out who’s in the audience - eight rows from the front, five columns from our left.”
“What are you...” said Misa, but trailed off as she spotted our friends, Dosel, Nantes, and Bromco. “Them!?” she hissed, barely keeping herself from crying out loud.
I then grinned mischievously. “Let’s round them up for the after party, huh?”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea, Lieutenant?” she asked archly, using my not-as-of-yet-official rank.
“Positive. You saw the recording I made of my last conversation with Breetai - they’re here to see if I was lying or not. Let’s show them just how much of a lie it was.”
We were cut off at that moment as Minmei was suddenly introduced. She came in from stage-right, carrying bouquets of red roses. She first handed one to Misa, shaking hands with her and welcoming her back.
And then she skipped over me.
This confused the hell out of everyone as they all began to think to themselves, ‘Hey, waituhmintue! That’s not how the script goes!’ However, I was the only one that saw her give me a mischievous wink and grin as she passed by, so I already knew she was up to something here.
Hikaru was next, though instead of a handshake, he got a chaste kiss on the cheek that set him to blushing furiously, and the crowd practically screamed in both amusement and outrage.
Max and Hayao both got the same treatment, making them both radiate bemusement as the crowed cheerfully jeered them and tossed out halfhearted threats of emasculation.
But then, Minmei came back to me, and without a word she pulled me down into a very spirited and steamy kiss. I upped the ante by dipping her as we kissed, almost reenacting that infamous kiss a sailor gave to a nurse in New York City on Victory Day.
Utter pandemonium ensued.
If the act hadn’t been something so innocuous, then a hard nosed cop might have arrested her for inciting a riot. People screamed all kinds of things at me. Cradle Robber. Lucky Dog. Bastard. Lucky Bastard. Even ‘pedophile’ got thrown out by a few that really wanted to make their point clear. But that, by far, was the smallest minority.
It’s a foregone conclusion that Minmei had staked her claim on me. This simply put all the rumors to rest.
“I missed you,” she whispered in my ear as we broke the kiss and simply held each other.
“Missed you too. Sorry about this.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.”
She then pulled away, but not before giving me one last impish peck on the cheek, and then left me with my own bouquet before stepping to the side and announcing that she would welcome us home with her break-out single, My Boyfriend is a Pilot.
Before, people had thought that the song was just pure metaphor. But now everyone knew for certain that she meant every word of a song about her boyfriend, and how he’d fly so gracefully that she would sometimes wonder if he loved his plane more than her.
Of course, everyone knew better, but it was understandable that a girl does sometimes wonder - even if in a humorous, self-deprecating manner.
Immediately after Minmei bowed, Roy Fokker came out in his best uniform, as he had the distinct honor of frocking us all.
Misa Hayase was promoted from Lieutenant Junior-Grade to Lieutenant.
Myself and Hikaru from Ensign to Lieutenant Junior-Grade.
Max was awarded a meteoric promotion to Ensign.
But Hayao remained an enlisted man with a promotion to Petty-Officer, Second-Class. He was happy enough with that, though, as just being in charge of his own plane and its support crew was responsibility enough, thank you very much!
And after one more performance by Minmei, we were about to all be shuffled off, but I stayed the hands of the ushers, jumping into the crowd, Misa following me closely, and Hikaru not far behind even though he didn’t know what was going on.
Everyone parted way for us, though a few wanted to shake my hand. I had to pass on that because this had to be done fast.
“Hoi! Dosel! Nantes! Bromco!”
The three Zentraedi intelligence agents went white as sheets as I called them out by name. I just smiled at them.
“C’mon you guys! You gotta be hungry, right?”
The three looked at each other and shrugged, no doubt recalling the last time they had enjoyed their time on board our ship, which admittedly had been a surprisingly comfortable experience for them, all things considered.
They all came over and joined us as we were hustled out en mass to the back exit where a limousine waited for us.
“You guys!?” cried out Hikaru in surprise. “How did you get here?”
“Classified!” cried out Dosel. Hikaru rolled his eyes.
Misa picked up the thread, though. “You were all sent here to spy on us, right?”
“Uh, maybe?” replied Nantes sheepishly, earning a sharp look from the others as we all piled into the limo.
“Guys, it’s alright,” I said once I made sure the window between us and the driver was closed. “I want to help you.”
“What!?” cried out Dosel, aghast. “You’d commit treason to help us?”
“It’s not treasonous to help you understand our culture,” I replied.
“Yeah,” said Hayao, who’d seen the recording along with the others. “You guys are just here to see if Cradle Robber was lying or not.”
“Ah guys?” said Minmei plaintively. “What’s going on?”
We all blinked as we suddenly realized that there was a civilian amongst us.
“Hooo boy. Sir?” I asked, looking to Roy, who was in on the whole thing anyhow, having been there for my rather remarkable debriefing.
Roy shrugged. “Can’t hurt anyhow,” he replied. “If they’re gonna learn about our culture, then it can’t hurt if they’re friends with Miss Macross herself.”
Minmei blushed at that appellation.
“Right then,” I said. “Minmei, I want you to meet Loli Dosel, Conda Bromco, and Warrera Nantes. They’re the three Zentraedi Hikaru and I captured a while back, and they’ve been sent back to learn more about us.” I then looked to the three Zentraedi. “Guys, this is the girl I mentioned before during our questioning - this is Lynn Minmei, my girlfriend.”
“So... males and females really do live together?” said Bromco, still reeling from the experiences they’d been through.
“What?” said Minmei in surprise. “You guys don’t!?”
“Yeah, they’re segregated by gender,” I said. “Probably cuts down on so-called ‘distractions’.”
“I’ll say it’s a distraction!” said Dosel. “How do you guys even function?”
Minmei grinned. “Practice.”
The rest of us laughed at the incredibly dead-on quip, further confusing the three Zentraedi.
##
It wasn’t long, of course, until we were pulling up in-front of the Nyan-Nyan.
It was just one of those things, you know. It was so natural. Everyone simply knew this to be. It was so pervasive that once word got around, Mr. Truent, without it being requested of him, cleared Minmei’s schedule for the next three days and set to work on getting everything back into line. So pervasive that once word got out, people began showing up at the Nyan-Nyan. Some bore gifts: flowers, cards, some candies and treats. Others pitched in to help with the sudden onset of decoration for the party.
The party that was entirely expected to happen. The one that every Valkyrie pilot and a good number of Destroid jockeys all showed up to without even being asked, but were welcomed anyhow.
The party in our honor that we showed up to, knowing full well that was going on without ever being told about it by anyone.
It was simply a fact of life here in Macross City.
We walked into the Nyan-Nyan.
Everyone cheered as I reenacted the kiss Minmei and I had earlier, sweeping her off her feet once more. Claudia was already there waiting and joined us the moment we entered, giving Roy a kiss to rival the one Minmei and I shared, provoking an equal measure of cheers.
Then the eleven of us; Roy, Claudia, Hikaru, Misa, Max, Hayao, Loli, Condo, Warrera, Minmei, and me; sat down together at a table, Minmei practically sharing one space at the table with me, and the festivities commenced with a great feast.
To say the least, we were all treated to the sight of three Zentraedi who’ve never enjoyed ‘real food’ before, have their minds completely and utterly blown.
##
That night, Roy assured me that he’d look after our three new friends for the night... after which he’d make sure that they made things right by helping to fix the damage they’d done to the locker room they broke into and become gainfully employed.
As for me...
Minmei dragged me up to her room. No one said a word. If anything happened, it was fine by everyone else. This was a special occasion, after all - I and my compatriots had practically come back from the dead. Auntie, in fact, shoved a few condoms into my hands, making it clear she didn’t want to explain any pregnancies out of wedlock to her in-laws, and causing Minmei to snicker wickedly at my humiliation.
However, nothing happened. Minmei slipped into her pajamas. I put on my own (she had tucked a set of mine away in her room once she heard I was coming home).
We didn’t even really say much. She simply pulled me down into her bed with her and we kissed for a time, carefully restraining ourselves despite what we both knew what we really wanted. And I knew she wanted to. It was hard to miss from the way she wrapped herself around me. But she held true to her word: until I put a wedding band on her finger, then I was out of luck. And her as well, it would seem.
But that was fine. It was good to wait.
We slowly deescalated, banking the fires of passion in favor of a steady and comforting warmth of simply being together as we slowly drifted off to sleep.
Let me tell you, I wouldn't want to wish that level of temptation on -anyone-.