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[IC][WIP][Arc 1] How I Managed to Quit Worrying and Love The Grief Seed
RE: [IC][WIP][Arc 1] How I Managed to Quit Worrying and Love The Grief Seed
#26
Ack. On an emotional level I truly hate those kinds of hooks -- so much good and just a reminder of evil. As a writer, yes, perfect use of the perfect device for the moment. But I so want to smash the little bastards.

Oh, and I caught a few typos you'll want to fix:
Quote:As the Lunar icon apeared on her head, so too did the Silver Moon Crystal.

"Appeared" is misspelled, and as written suggests that the Ginzuishou appeared on her head, too.

Quote:Fate and I... we we’re lucky to meet.

were

Quote:Fate put her arms around Alicia and burring her head into the pillow next to her sister’s.

"Burying", and the sentence is a fragment.
-- Bob

I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh, Clark Kent, Mary Sue, DJ Croft, Skysaber.  I have been 
called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the sun grows dim and cold....
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RE: [IC][WIP][Arc 1] How I Managed to Quit Worrying and Love The Grief Seed - by Bob Schroeck - 04-18-2019, 08:16 AM

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