Hold Emma/The Humour Criminal (Worm AU filk)

[classicdrogn]

who else is imagining Bumblebee doing the "With cat-like tread" song?

With Ant-Like Tread
(With apologies once more to Gilbert & Sullivan)

(There are multiple versions of this song, but I worked from the clip which this google search should bring up)

BUMBLEBEE:
With ant-like tread
Into the school we steal
No child's head
Need trepidation feel
No sound at all
But softly buzzing wings
A cat's foot-falls
Would be the louder things

TEACHER:
I'm not so sure... I'm not so sure...

BUMBLEBEE:
So friendly is each bumblebee
No need to call the PRT

Come, children, pet my bees
There's no need to cower
Pollinator power
Let's vary burglary
With a little revelry

(Note: the music forces this verse to be here, but for better timing move it to just before the teacher's next line)
Queen Bee at school today
Not the kind of queenie
who's a stuck up meanie
Everyone wants to play
Come on teacher, what you say

to TOM BUMBLEDIL:
I can't blame your
want to play a bit
With such lovely flowers
How could you resist?

Childish laughter
is as sweet as honey
We've got time
Before we need to flee

TEACHER:
I'm not so sure...

BUMBLEBEE:
You can go first

TEACHER:
I'm not so sure...

BUMBLEBEE:
Ensure no hurts

TEACHER:
...
...
WOOHOO!

BUMBLEBEE:
With Ant-Like Tread
Into the school we steal
No child's head
Need trepidation feel
No sound at all
But softly buzzing wings
A cat's foot-falls
Would be the louder things

Bee-back is comfy, see
Aerial gyration
Frolicsome elation
No need for jealousy
Everyone gets their own bee

And if from high
A daring fool should leap
A practiced catch
His noggin safe to keep

Come, now it's time to leave
We've accomplished our--
Oh just take the flower
Check later and you'll see
Buses painted festively

With ant like tread
a flower
sweet
we steal

When Emma's head
explodes
it's fair
we feel

(Swarm leaves)

TAYLOR:
That bitch, is she mad?
So twisted up inside
A schoolyard fight is bad
endangers lives

AUDIENCE:
YES! YES!
Crystalia is mad

DR MOTHER:
Yes yes
Crystalia is mad

CRYSTALIA:
Yes yes
I'm furiously mad