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[Story][Short][IC][Arc 1] Butterflies and Hurricanes
RE: [Story][Short][IC][Arc 1] Butterflies and Hurricanes
#2
I've had the advantage of pre-reading this part, so I'll confine myself to a couple of errors - one mine, one BA's. Starting with mine:

Quote:Mikoto could only barely grasp the concept. She had rarely ever felt true hunger, and the times she did was when she missed a meal because of circumstances beyond her control coming to play.

My error because I didn't catch it in prereading. Mikoto did willingly go without food by choice while she was destroying cloning labs during Railgun S - which was the only reason she didn't throw up the first time she fought ITEM.


Quote:fowl remarks
"Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage! " Smile

fowl/foul
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
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RE: [Story][Short][IC][Arc 1] Butterflies and Hurricanes - by robkelk - 08-12-2021, 07:01 AM

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