The Dead Dove Locker -- "I don't know what I expected."

[Mamorien]

Scientists are still figuring out what's wrong with me, but in the meantime, I inflict on give you Made in the Milling: The Sadie Miller Story, the Achewood/Steven Universe crossover we never knew we needed and probably still don't.

You know that thing where a dying guy passes on his MacGuffin and things get really complicated? Sadie Miller just had that trope waltz into her life. She's got a ticket to the Great Outdoor Fight--three days, three acres, three thousand men, all vying to see who is the best fighter. Can she even dream of making it to the Acres, much less survive, much less win? Only one way to find out--and all of Beach City is getting in on the game.

Debatably* a feel-good story about personal achievement through ass-kicking. Definitely extremely profane and bloody. Technically an AU splitting off from when Peridot was in her "toilet goblin" phase. Crack fic? At points, literally.

*Somehow autocorrected to "detestably" even though this was posted from a computer. How..?

If you want to find out whether this is worth poking the author to pick back up, you can start here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/136921...s/31448793

Spoiler

Plus, as if on cue, two new Welcome to Elkerisa University (Hogwarts for futas) chapters, in which, In the Heat of the Felinight, Arstea rails Ash Right into the Mattress.