2016-12-23: Various Ways to Spend Christmas Eve Eve

[robkelk]

Various Ways to Spend Christmas Eve Eve

by Rob Kelk

---

Kasukabe, Saitama, Japan
December 23, 2006

School had let out for the semester, and the students had taken their report cards home. Two of these students, fraternal twin sisters, had dutifully given their report cards to their father and accepted his assessment of their grades: Kagami Hiiragi was still on-track to get a recommendation to a national university, while her sister Tsukasa was still struggling to keep up in the prep school that they both attended. In two other households, two of Tsukasa's classmates were also delivering their report cards to their parents: Miyuki Takara was telling her mother that getting the top marks in her class wasn't a big deal really, while Konata Izumi (having changed out of her school uniform first) was quietly slipping her own report card into the middle of a stack of mail for her father and getting out of the house while she had the chance. Konata knew that her grades were barely better than Tsukasa's.

Having grabbed her rarely-used cellphone on the way out of the house, Konata texted Kagami while she walked to the bus stop. "Want to go sing karaoke?"

A reply quickly appeared: "No anime songs."

"Fine, fine," Konata texted back... although, as far as she was concerned, singing anime themes at the top of her lungs was the best part of karaoke. And she'd almost got her Aya Hirano impersonation perfected, too. [1] "Does Tsukasa want to come along? I'll call Miyuki and ask if she wants in."

A half-hour later, the girls had assembled at the subway station closest to their favorite karaoke parlor. Miyuki looked particularly excited. "I have two songs picked out to sing today!" she announced. "I won't be like last time, only singing once."

"You heard her," Kagami said to Konata. "No monopolizing the microphone this time."

"You'll just have to put songs in, then." Konata answered as the four of them boarded the bus that would take them to the karaoke parlor. "I'm not going to waste time that we paid for and not hear somebody singing."

"Miyuki-san has a pretty singing voice," commented Tsukasa. "I want to hear her sing again."

"Why, thank you," replied Miyuki. But it had been a long day; she nodded off as the bus pulled away from the station, quickly followed into slumberland by her three friends.

Eventually, they opened their eyes. "Where are we?" asked Miuyki lazily.

"I don't know. I think we fell asleep," muttered Konata as she looked out the bus' window.

"And we just talked about falling asleep on the bus a few days ago," Tsukasa added through a yawn.

"There's no point in talking about it," Kagami said with as much conviction as she could manage while rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "Let's get off at the next stop and get a bus going the other way."

They did so ...


Place Sun Yat-sen, Montreal, QC, Canada, Refuge
December 23, 2016

... and found themselves in a small Chinese-style park, with no bus - or bus stop - to be seen nearby.

"What is this place?" Tsukasa asked. "I've never been here before."

"Neither have I," her sister added.

"Nor I," added Miyuki.

Konata took a quick look around. "It looks almost like a fighting game level backdrop, with that pavilion over there and the murals on the walls."

Kagami sighed. "Everything reminds you of games, doesn't it?" she asked crossly.

"That doesn't", replied Tsukasa as she pointed at the building to the right of the pavilion... the brown brick building with distinctly non-Chinese signs above the doors to the businesses housed within.

"Miyuki, you're better than the rest of us at English. What do those signs say?"

She looked at them for a moment, then turned to Kagami, "I believe that they're the names of the businesses in the buildings. And that isn't English."

Konata asked, "Then what is it?"

After a moment, Tukasa picked up a flyer that has been left on a bench and answered, "It's French. I remember seeing these words in a cookbook," she added while pointing at the phrase "marmelade de sucre" at the top of the flyer.

"Are we in Paris?" Konata asked with sudden delight.

"I don't think so," Kagami replied while looking at the licence plate on a car parked beside the park. "Unless there's a Paris in Canada. That car has a Quebec license plate." [2]

"Oh," Konata replied flatly.

"How do we find out where we are?" Tsukasa asked worriedly.

They thought for a moment. Finally, Konata offered, "We could wait here until somebody who speaks Japanese comes along."

"And how likely is that to happen in Canada?" Kagami asked angrily.

From behind them, an unfamiliar voice (to everyone but Konata, who thought she sounded a lot like Kana Ueda) answered in Japanese. "You might be surprised. And none of you have been speaking Japanese at least since we walked over to you."

They turned to see two black-haired Asian girls, both younger than they were. One was wearing a long dark blue coat and a headband covered with flowers. The other was wearing a scarlet coat over a black skirt with stockings that didn't quite reach her skirt, her hair tied in twin-tails by black ribbons.

The twin-tailed girl turned to the girl with flowers in her hair. "You're going to insist we help them, aren't you?" The twin-tailed girl was the one who Konata thought sounded like Kana Ueda.

"We can't just leave them here." There was something vaguely familiar about this girl's voice as well, but Konata couldn't figure it out offhand. Said girl approached the four and smiled. "I'm Kazari Uiharu. Pleased to meet you."

"Konata Izumi. Hi there." Konata thought she'd heard Uiharu-san's name before, but with everything going on, she was having trouble remembering where.

As Miyuki and the Hiiragi sisters introduced themselves, Kazari's smile turned into a grin. She turned to face her companion. "I knew it! They're like us!" She turned back to the others. "I'm not the best person at this... You're in another world, and we're all fictional characters here. Want to have lunch with us? We were going to get some dim sum."

Konata muttered, "Either that's the worst pickup line I've ever heard, or she's crazy, or... I don't want to finish this sentence."

Kagami turned to the other girl, an annoyed look on her face. "You expect us to believe we're fictional characters? Is your friend always like this, miss...?"

"Not always," the twin-tailed girl replied. "And I'm Rin Tohsaka. Nice to meet you."

"You can't be," Konata stated flatly.

In reply, Rin wordlessly cast a spell, causing her hand to glow for a moment. Since it was the middle of the day, only the six of them could see the effect.

"You are." Konata looked and sounded very worried.

Still puzzled about everything, Miyuki raised her hand. "Excuse me, but who are you? Not just your name, but who you see yourself as."

Konata spun on her heels to face Miyuki. "She's one of the lead characters in an ero-game I really doubt you've heard of because it's too new."

Before Rin could react, Kazari said, "Izumi-san, please don't mention that game in Rin-san's presence. I don't want to have to call an ambulance for you."

Konata stopped cold, all expression leaving her face. After a moment, she said quietly, "Don't piss off the spellcaster. Right. Important safety tip. And now I remember where I heard your name before, miss Judgment officer and Level 1 esper."

"Well, yes, but I'm not part of Judgment while I'm in this world."

Seeing that one of her closest friends wasn't acting like herself, and guessing why, Miyuki quickly acted to defuse the situation by changing the subject. "I wouldn't mind having lunch. But I can't pay for it; all of my money is Japanese."

"Oh, I can pay for a few dishes for you!" Kazari beamed, happy to draw attention away from her esper power.

"And I can cover a few, too," added Rin. "It isn't as if people in my favourite restaurants here in Montreal don't know that I always pay my debts."

"So. We're in Montreal." Konata stated, desperate to rejoin the conversation on a positive note.

"We are," Rin agreed.

"And now I have to finish that sentence that I didn't want to finish. We're in a Narō novel."

"They're called 'isekai' now," commented Kazari. "And, yes."

"And considering how normal you both look, I'll bet we're not getting power-ups right away." Konata sighed. "Let's talk about our quest over lunch. We are getting a quest to save the world, right?"

Kazari looked puzzled. "Not as far as I know... but we could ask our friends whether there's anything like a quest that you could go on."

"No quest? That takes all the fun out of being in a Narō novel - sorry, in an isekai novel." In a quieter voice that she thought nobody else could hear, Konata continued, "Oh, well. It looks like I'm going to miss winter Comiket this year."

---

Appartements Mont-Royal Sud, Montreal, QC, Canada
December 23, 2016

The girls had enjoyed a late lunch. At least, they had enjoyed the food; the situation they were in still left them worried.

Now, the four students from Ryouou - now displacees in Refuge - and their impromptu guides were walking along Park Avenue.

Kagami, at least, was able to act normally for her. "Could somebody explain to me why the sun looks like it's going to set in the north?"

Konata turned to Kagami. "We're in a different world. We can't expect things to be the same as they were back home."

Rin laughed. "There's a simpler answer, Hiiragi-san. The St. Lawrence River flows roughly east-northeast for the most part, draining the Great Lakes into the Atlantic Ocean, but there's a bend in the river around Montreal Island where the river flows almost directly north. Montrealers call downriver 'east', despite a compass calling the same direction 'north'. It's a local shibboleth."

"What's a shibboleth?"

Before Miyuki could explain the concept to Tsukasa, Rin announced, "We're here."

"Nice place," Konata commented politely. "And you have a coffee and sweets shop on-site."

"It's convenient," Rin replied as she opened the building's side door. "And before you ask, we're only using half of the apartments so far. Cassiopée-ōya-san was wondering why we had so much room for so few people; I think your arrival answers at least part of that question."

Since Rin had called ahead with the news, her landlady was waiting for them. "Indeed," replied a thirty-something white woman with short black hair. "I'm the apartment manager here, Cassiopée Bright. Bienvenue à Montréal!" The four newcomers introduced themselves in turn. "Kazari, will you be staying for dinner?"

She shook her head. "No, I should be getting home now. If anything bad happened while I was here, we would have heard about it by now, so it should be safe for me to go home. I'll see you at the party tomorrow!" And she headed for the portal network in the building's garage.

"What was that all about?" Konata wondered out loud as Kazari left them.

"I'm not completely sure," Rin replied, "but Kazari-san said something about the solstice, her landlord, and his new girlfriend."

Cassiopée turned to Rin. "There will be plenty of time later to explain what's happening elsewhere in the world." Turning to the newcomers, she added, "I assume you'd rather share apartments with somebody you know than have to live alone, so I asked Archer to get futons out of storage and put them in the two apartments on the third floor. I apologize for the lack of comforts and hope you don't mind not having proper beds for another three or four days. It's Christmas time here and the stores are crowded."

"It does make sense to wait for the end-of-year sales," agreed Kagami.

"Thank you for your kindness," Miyuki added with a slight bow, the other three bowing a heartbeat later. Only Konata showed any irritation at the idea of needing to walk up multiple flights of stairs to get to her new home; she thought that she'd hidden her reaction, but she was still affected by everything that had happened in the last few hours.

"We're living together, right, big sis?" Tsukasa asked Kagami worriedly. She wasn't ready to live on her own yet.

Her twin sister nodded. "We're going to have to. If I let you live with Konata, neither of you would get your homework done."

"And you and Miyuki would starve to death, because neither of you know how to cook," Konata added.

Kagami glared at Konata, then turned back to her sister and and continued crossly, "And if you lived with Miyuki, I'd never get my homework done because a certain homework copier would be asking to copy it all the time."

"Fine, fine, I'll make sure Miyuki doesn't starve," Konata grumbled, not willing to let Kagami know just how correct her assumption was. Nothing was going the way she had expected it to happen in a Narō story. "Assuming I can find a part-time job that'll let me attend school and leave time for me to cook. The food and rent here isn't free, I'm sure."

Cassiopée shook her head as she said, "We won't let you starve or go without a place to stay or clothes to wear, as long as you're attending classes. We have resources that we can draw upon."

"Free room and board, and clothes, and manga?" Konata asked happily. "At least that genre convention is happening!"

"Not the manga," replied Cassiopée quickly. "That, you have to earn money to buy for yourself." Before Konata could ask about other things that might be included, Cassiopée added, "We'll shop for the absolute necessities today and tomorrow, fighting the Christmas Eve shoppers for what you need. Believe it or not, an evening gown for each of you is an absolute necessity for tomorrow night's concert; I managed to get invitations for each of you after Rin told me you were here. I'll need your sizes."

"I'll get then for you," Rin volunteered before turning back to the newcomers. "They use a different measuring system here for clothes, so I'll need to get out a tape measure and spend a few minutes writing everything down."

Tsukasa smiled and said, "If you spend your lives going to fancy parties, I don't mind being an isekai character."

Cassiopée smiled kindly upon the girl's statement as she replied, "No, this is a special function. After Christmas we'll buy you more than just basic clothing and furniture, including computers good enough for school work but not for gaming. Oh, I should show you around. My office is upstairs. If you need any help, just ask. This is our dining room," she added while opening  the only interior door on the ground floor.

The girls walked in to see what looked like a small bistro-style restaurant with a bar in the middle of the room. Ten of the places had already been set for the evening meal, leaving over half of the room's tables without so much as a tablecloth. While the girls looked around, Cassiopée walked over to the kitchen door and said, "Shirou! Four more for supper!"

The question "We have guests?" came through the doorway, accompanied by the sound of water filling a pot.

"We have new residents," Cassiopée replied.

The sounds from the kitchen stopped, and a moment later Shirou poked his head out. "Hello! I'm Shirou Emiya," he said politely. Then he noticed how attractive the four young women were, and continued with more feeling, "I'm happy to make your acquaintance."

Still standing behind the newcomers, Rin cleared her throat meaningfully.

Shirou went back to being polite. "I hope you'll find your stay here enjoyable." Then he moved to head back to the kitchen, stopped for a moment, and turned back to the newcomers. "I could use some help in the kitchen. I don't suppose any of you know how to make agedashi dōfu?"

Before Konata could answer that, yes, she knew how to fry tofu, Tsukasa said, "I can do that! And if I help with the cooking, it'll repay your kindness for taking us in."

Kagami turned to Cassiopée. "I think we've lost my sister for a while - when she decides she wants to cook, she doesn't stop until the meal's ready. If you don't mind her helping out, I'll sign the paperwork for both of us to move in." Then she turned to Rin and quietly added something she would later regret saying: "And I'm pretty sure that you don't have anything to worry about from my sister."

Cassiopée smiled at that. "Well, Mlle. Hiiragi, you may as well help Shirou, then."

Tsukasa walked into the kitchen while the others headed for the manager's office. As they left the dining room, they heard Tsukasa say, "Nobody else uses this kitchen? And you don't use it every day? Does that mean I can use it? I'm in heaven..."

---

Rue St-Hubert, Montreal, QC, Canada
December 24, 2016

Cassiopée had called ahead, so they were expected when they arrived at a shop that sold nothing but evening gowns when the store opened at 7 AM. "Yes, Mlle. Takara, we are buying prêt-à-porter gowns. We don't have time to get you anything sur mesure. We need to be wearing the dresses at 18 heures today. And each dress here costs only what I might spend on one or two month's worth of groceries." Three of the girls paled at the thought that they were going to spend that much on a single outfit, while Miyuki took the news in stride. "Although we'll need to pay extra for same-day alterations, and go elsewhere for wraps, shoes, and clutch purses."

"Thank you for your continued patronage, Mme. Bright," the store's senior fitter said in French as they walked in. "These are the young ladies whose bags did not arrive with them?"

"They are, yes."

"We must act quickly if you are to meet your schedule. This way, please, ladies."

Konata and Miyuki ended up in Empire gowns, the former in a dark blue that almost matched her hair colour because it was the only thing they still had in a size 00 (and Konata refused to shop at the children's dress store just down the street) and the latter in red because it was the only thing they had left that wouldn't need drastic alterations to the bustline in order to fit her. The twins wore matching off-white Goddess gowns because they were on sale and each girl felt uncomfortable spending a small fortune on a single dress. While Cassiopée mentioned that wearing the same dress as somebody else was considered a minor catastrophe at most formal events, Kagami pointed out that twins were always allowed to dress alike.

"I never knew how much work it was to buy just one fancy outfit," Kagami said as they headed for a shoe store, fabric swatches the same colour as their dresses in hand for comparison purposes. "And we're going to need jewelry with this sort of outfit, aren't we?"

"You will, but I have earrings and necklaces that I can lend to you," Cassiopée replied without taking her eyes off the road. Traffic in Montréal was bad enough to have a negative reputation at the best of times; traffic in Montréal on Christmas Eve day was even worse than normal.

But somehow the dress alterations were completed and they managed to buy everything that they absolutely needed for the evening, despite the crowds.

---

Appartements Mont-Royal Sud, Montreal, QC, Canada
December 24, 2016

By the time the girls had accessorized, it was nearly time for lunch... which most of them ate at home because they were on a tight schedule.

Tsukasa looked at her new purse while Shirou made sandwiches for everyone. "I can't believe we spent over three thousand dollars today on party clothes!"

"We'll be spending more," Miyuki replied. "None of us have been to a hair salon yet."

"I'm sorry, but I was only able to get one appointment at my usual salon," Cassiopée said. "Your hair ribbon does not go well with your new dress, Tsukasa, so it has to be you who gets your hair styled. The rest of you have hair that's long enough to wear loose and straight with your gowns, although I have a comb-style hair clip [3] that would go well with Konata's dress." She turned to the boy who'd just brought a platter of sandwiches out of the bistro's kitchen. "Shirou, Tsukasa and I will need to take our lunches with us."

"Of course," he sighed as he went back to the kitchen to get a paper bag and two bottles of water.

They came back two hours later to discover a neat stack of documents waiting for Tsukasa. Cassiopée's hair was in the same pixie cut as it was when she left. True to Cassiopée's word, Tsukasa was the one with a new hairdo: an old-fashioned centre-parted bob with a permanent wave and absolutely no ribbons or flyaway strands at all. She was also wearing a pendant necklace that she hadn't been wearing when she left.

Shirou saw her come in as he was putting the finishing touches on the bistro's cleaning. He stopped still for a moment, realized he was staring at a very cute girl who was only one year older than he was, and finally said, "Welcome back, Hiiragi-san. Vár left these for you : school enrolment forms, passport, health card, and such. What sort of stone is that?"

"The one on my new necklace?" Tsukasa turned to her landlady, a puzzled expression on her face. "I never thought to ask. I just thought it looked pretty."

Cassiopée said, "Out of respect for the Sailor Senshi who you'll be meeting this evening, we should call it lavender jade."

"Lavender jade. All right. How is that out of respect for... Sailor Moon is in this world, too?"

Cassiopée smiled as she replied, "She is, and so are her teammates. As for showing them respect, the stone's also called jadeite."

"I don't understand."

Before Cassiopée could reply to Tsukasa, Shirou said to the younger woman, "Rin told me that Uiharu-san didn't accept a gem because it had the same name as one of the Senshi's foes. And Jadeite was the name of their very first foe."

"Oh. That sounds like a silly reason to refuse a gift."

"We can talk about that later," Cassiopée insisted, interrupting Shirou's obvious attempt to look good in front of Tsukasa. "Right now, Shirou needs to start getting ready for tonight and you need to do your makeup."

"I've never worn makeup before."

Of course she's an ingénue, Cassiopée thought, before volunteering, "I'll have to help you with it, then."

They climbed the stairs to the top floor, where the Ryouou students' apartments were. Noticing that Konata and Miyuki's apartment door was open, Tsukasa said, "We're back!"

"Welcome home," Miyuki replied. Then she got a good look at her friend. "I love your new hairdo, Tsukasa. It reminds me of Rita Hayworth's usual hairstyle in the 1940s, but a bit shorter."

"It can't help but be short; the hairdresser didn't have a lot to work with," Tsukasa replied. "Does it really look good on me?"

Cassiopée smiled. "Didn't you notice that M. Emiya couldn't keep his eyes off you? But that's another thing that we can talk about later. Tsukasa, you and I still need to do a lot to get ready."

That took a half-hour after Tsukasa finished her shower, being careful not to get her hair wet, and got into her underwear. At the end of the makeup session, Tsukasa looked in the mirror. "That can't be me... can it?"

"Why do you think it isn't you, Tsukasa?" Cassiopée asked.

"Because the girl in the mirror is so pretty."

Cassiopée quickly confirmed that Belldandy wasn't using Tsukasa's vanity mirror to visit, then replied, "The girl in the mirror is you."

"I don't even see the makeup, but I can see the changes it made. Please teach me how to do this kind of makeup."

Cassiopée smiled, thinking that she might be able to help Tsukasa gain some much-needed self-confidence by helping her with something so easy. "Of course. After Christmas day."

By the time all of the building's residents were in their finery and the gifts that they were bringing were in bags, it was time to leave. "Is everyone ready?" Grahame asked, visibly uncomfortable in his black tie and tails.

"Of course we are," Cassiopée replied to her husband. Nobody mentioned that Miyuki and Konata didn't look quite as pretty as the other women in the group, because Miyuki still looked lovely and Konata's small stature meant she couldn't help but look like a junior-high student cosplaying as a grownup. At least, Konata thought she looked like she was cosplaying, which let her consider her outfit as something that an otaku would wear. And if she told herself that often enough, she was sure that she'd believe it eventually.

While walking from the apartments to the garage and the portal, they passed two of the people who worked at the building's coffee shop – a dark-haired boy with glasses half-hiding his grey eyes and a young brown-eyed blonde woman, both busy moving a delivery into the shop's kitchen. "Oh, I wish we could go to a fancy party," the blonde said with an accent that most of them couldn't place but Cassiopée recognized as Parisienne French, "but we have to be ready for the rest of this week. Have fun!"

"The next time we're invited out, I'll be sure to ask whether you can come along, Miss Tennouji," Grahame replied gallantly.

"Thank you, but I doubt we'll be able to get away from the shop."

"That's a shame. Well, we must be leaving now. À bientôt!"

As Cassiopée lead the way to the portal, Konata muttered, "A hazel-eyed blonde named Tennouji. Why does that sound familiar?"

Kagami glowered at her best friend. "Not everybody is out of a game or an anime."

"Everyone we live with except for the Brights are." But then Grahame activated the portal and Konata forgot what she was about to say. "Is that a Stargate?"

"No, it's something that Washuu-chan put together for us," Sakura answered.

"'Washuu-chan'? From Tenchi Muyo? It's about time this world started looking like a real isekai story!"

"Well, we didn't want to spoil all of the surprises yesterday," Grahame replied with a bit of a smile. "Are you ready to meet other people who have come to this world?"

"Am I ever!"

"Then hold your NEXUS cards [4] up to the scanner so you can enter the United States legally."

The girls from Ryouou did so, and stepped through the portal into their big debut in Refuge.

---

---

1. RK: For the half-dozen readers who don't get the joke, Aya Hirano played Konata in the anime TV series.
   
2. RK: As a matter of fact, there is a Paris in Canada... but it's a small town, it isn't in Quebec, and nobody taking part in the discussion knows that it exists.
   
3. RK: That's a Canadian and Australian term. Many Americans call hair clips "barrettes", while they're called "hair slides" in parts of the U.K.
   
4. RK: See the 15th footnote in Like Calls to Like