Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website
Re: Chapter 14
#53
Thank you so very much, Josh.
Okay, Murmur, let's see if I can answer to your satisfaction in the half hour I have before I have to start work...
Quote:
I found Oscar the Mechanical Man's acculturation to humanity to be surprisingly fast. Granted that he served in covert activities before, but he picked up on certain nuances a bit too quickly to be believed. Maybe some more scenes of him getting used to the ineffable condition of sentience should be added
Why would he need acculturation to humanity, or have to "get used to" sentience? He already had both. Look at the boomers who kidnapped Cynthia in episode one of the OVAs. Like Oscar/Kilroy they were covert models, and they were in no way mechanical or artificial in behavior. They had unique personalities, and were clearly experienced at living as human beings -- especially Frederick, who passed as human while working with a dozen or more people every day in a paranoid high-security facility. They even had obvious, if somewhat crude, emotions. Doug's changes don't make a boomer sentient -- they just take the locks off his ability to be free and complete person.
Quote:
Also, he certainly both picked up a sense of humor and the ability to adequately quip with Doug very, VERY quickly.
Again, he didn't "pick those up" -- he already had them. They were, admittedly, muted during his first couple hours of freedom, as he was busy trying to figure out whether he was about to be "disposed of" or not. But they came out as he became more relaxed around Doug.
Quote:
Oh, yes. As for any dramatic quality that the final scene had was lost because in an earlier scene, Doug specifically mentioned that he both survived it and moved onto another world (the Doug singing scene). I mean, OF COURSE, we know that. And given that it's told in the first person, we're pretty sure anyway. But still, by coming out and saying it like that makes sure that the readers know that Doug is ultimately unaffected by his kidnapping. At least, that's the effect.
Hm. I hadn't considered that. Maybe I should change the passage. Good catch.
Quote:
Oh, and have you considered that there is a much more appropiate Styx song for this chapter? (Oh, momma I'm in fear for my life from the long arm of the law . . .)
You know, I've been trying to find a good place for that song. I never thought of it for this chapter.
Thanks for the opinions, Murmur.


-- Bob
---------
"Flan on!" -- The battlecry of the Human Dessert
Reply


Messages In This Thread
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Elsa Bibat - 11-14-2003, 06:03 PM
Comments on DWII - Chapter 14 - by Rod.H - 11-14-2003, 06:15 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by the kwp - 11-14-2003, 06:31 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Kokuten - 11-14-2003, 07:45 PM
Re: re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by cpt kangarooski - 11-15-2003, 01:48 AM
Re: re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Koryimran - 11-15-2003, 04:23 AM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Jeanne Hedge - 11-15-2003, 06:02 AM
Re: re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Ace Dreamer - 11-15-2003, 02:57 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Jeanne Hedge - 11-15-2003, 04:49 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Jeanne Hedge - 11-15-2003, 06:38 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Loki Laufeyjarson - 11-15-2003, 11:41 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Ace Dreamer - 11-16-2003, 02:07 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Loki Laufeyjarson - 11-16-2003, 04:59 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Ace Dreamer - 11-17-2003, 12:57 AM
Sick, sick, sick - by Bob Schroeck - 11-18-2003, 05:42 PM
Regarding computer bits... - by Logan Darklighter - 11-18-2003, 08:22 PM
Re: Chapter 14 - by Murmur the Fallen - 11-21-2003, 01:08 AM
Re: Chapter 14 - by Offsides - 11-21-2003, 05:05 AM
Re: Chapter 14 - by Bob Schroeck - 11-21-2003, 05:09 PM
Duhh . . . Nope, nope, nope - by Murmur the Fallen - 11-22-2003, 11:08 AM
Re: Duhh . . . Nope, nope, nope - by Ace Dreamer - 11-22-2003, 02:11 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by Elsa Bibat - 11-24-2003, 12:37 PM
Re: Duhh . . . Nope, nope, nope - by Bob Schroeck - 11-26-2003, 08:28 AM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by WengFook - 12-16-2003, 07:25 AM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by WengFook - 12-16-2003, 02:28 PM
Re: Chapter 14 Now Available on My Website - by WengFook - 12-17-2003, 02:44 PM

Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)