Commentary on Chapter 12

[Bob Schroeck]

Okay, let's try this again. I made an attempt at replying to this last night around 10:30 EST, but something that I haven't fully figured out happened and my system locked up completely; I lost what I wrote. Let me see if I can reconstruct it.

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Very well written. Very clear throughout.

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Thanks. Given that I spent 13 months writing about ten minutes' worth of action, I'd hope the ratio of time spent to time depicted means every individual word was optimally chosen...

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I had no trouble at all visualizing all the action that was happening, with the possible exception of a couple of the knife moves made by Hexe. I parsed the fight between her and Sylia just fine overall, but had trouble visualizing exact arm and hand positions sometimes.

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Well, maybe you can come by one night and we'll have Helen's husband Attila demonstrate all those moves on you the way he demonstrated them on me. Along with an injured finger, I got a rather comprehensively kinesthetic sense of the action between the two.

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I was right about the power level of the Warriors. They are definitely in Justice League territory.

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I think you're overpraising us there, but we definitely have fielded individual JLA-level talents.

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On that note - now I'm curious - intensely curious - as to the stats of the other Warriors. Heck, just post or send me the V&V characters stats and I can do conversions of them!

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To tell you the truth, Peggy's hesitant about sharing her characters. And the others, well, I sent them emails pointing them to this review, but none of them have gotten back to me yet.

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As to all the Warriors - I'd love to know more about them!

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Well, I can promise you a "Mouseketeer roll call" of Warriors members in the last chapter, so you'll at least learn the names of many past and present Warriors. (I was quite surprised when I figured out just how many there actually had been, even given that some of us had played in two or more of the subsidiary campaigns.)

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I know you don't have the time to do Warriors stories on top of everything else,

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God knows it's not like we haven't tried. Somewhere, someone still has the pencils from the Warriors comic book we tried to do in the mid-80s. There have been other short stories featuring Warriors, but their authors are not so stupid as I to go and put them up where other people can see them. I've even considered trying to market a Warriors cartoon (going to far as to start to storyboard the opening animation for kicks). A former Warriors player from the late 80s is now a reasonably big name in TV (I'd cite some of his credits, but anyone reasonably adept with the IMDB could figure him out that way, and I don't want him bothered by overenthusiastic DW fans) and I've mentioned the idea to him. Unsuccessfully, though.

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and these characters are not your own, so I'll just send my compliments to you, as the writer, for portraying them here and making me interested in them in such a short space of time, and to their creators and players for coming up with some truly neat concepts!

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Thank you, and I'll pass along your compliments to their intended recipients. I just want to mention that making those concepts work is harder than you might think -- V&V is a random-generation system, and a player has a major challenge on his hands assembling a reasonable theme for a character with a bunch of apparently unrelated powers... (V&V is also an explicitly self-insert game -- the rules require that your first character be you with powers!) Above and beyond that, though, I think what you're reacting to is the fact that these characters all have 15 years or so of living history behind them, informing all their actions and dialogue even when it isn't really "visible" onscreen. They've lived, grown, faced challenges both personal and global, experienced success, experienced failure, gain, loss, and in some cases grew from teenager to mature adult over that span. There's a weight to that and it'd be impossible for me not to write them without that influence.

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so the only member here that we've seen in "person" now that hasn't gotten as much conversation time was Silverbolt. Perhaps we'll get to see her again at some future time?

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Not in DW2, unfortunately. And at the moment the plots for the other Steps don't have too much call for simulacra (Doug takes Hexe's warning to heart, too). However... can you imagine the reaction of Gendo Ikari and the Central Dogma Bridge Bunnies to a manifestation of Hexe or Silverbolt taking on an Angel?

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Heck, Dwimanor has been mentioned enough I'd love to see him. Maybe he might pop up in the (proposed) Sailor Moon step?

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Well, if you don't mind a magical mentor who's only around for 3 minutes a day. Otherwise, well, he's not one of the front line Warriors. ("What's his simulacrum song?" I'm sure you're asking. "Magic Man" by Heart.)

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"Your entrance was good, his was better. The difference? Showmanship!"

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I know that's a quote from something, but what? I can't place it.

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Madigan's thought - *Damn him! That man is chaos incarnate!* - Why do I get the distinct impression that more than one villain in the Warrior's universe has said that exact same line on more than one occasion?

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Because it's accurate without being literally true? Arcanum, the campaign's central big bad for many many years, once harassed the Warriors by publishing a book of tactics that could be used against them; the number one rule in there for anyone going into combat against us was "Take down Looney Toons, fast and hard". Because you never know what he's going to come up with to screw up your plans.

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why do I get the impression that Hexe has a presence that makes some minor villains just wet themselves?

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I wouldn't know. We haven't fought a minor villain in years...

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Important safety tip: Do NOT make this woman truly mad at you...

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That's good advice even for the villains.

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Lisa's "Warrior's World" memories getting stronger with the entrance of the Warriors simulacrums - that was a bit of an unexpected twist. How'd you come up with that?

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Kind of by accident, actually. I needed Lisa to remember a specific detail from Warriors' World for something that happens in chapter 13 -- nothing big, you'll know it when you see it -- so she was always intended to have some retention -- after all, what would be the point of the effect if you didn't remember at least something? And so I set that up with her comments to Leon about memories in the scene where the two of them are talking in the conference room at the 16 Times. Many months later, I began to write the big fight for chapter 12. And after a few non-Warriors prereaders expressed a certain amount of confusion about who was who, I realized we needed some way of giving the readers extra info that Doug would know, but would have no real reason to be thinking about during the fight. And Lisa was there, already prepped with Warriors' World memories. It just became a matter of expanding the scope of those memories so the reader had a "scorecard" that he could use to tell the players apart -- someone with an "intimate outsider"'s point of view, if that makes any sense.
And that's all there is to Lisa's WW memories -- and to Hexe's toning them down afterwards. Despite the theories flying in another thread, they're not the key to some secret power slumbering inside Lisa; they were just a useful narrative device. Of course, now that I've intensified them to use them in that way, I have to deal with the implications as they rise in later chapters; and no, except for one specific implication that you will see in chapter 13, I haven't figured out what all of those will be. If there are any more.

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And does that happen with everyone that Doug has done that song for? Speaking of which - I take it that Doug has done that song for himself? Did it have the same effects on him?

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Some of that will have to be answered later -- another case of any honest answer I can provide will give something away about the story. However, to tell you the absolute (minimum) truth, this song exists as a power only in the story; it's one that doesn't have a history in the campaign. What Doug says during that scene was all I knew of the song at the time I wrote. Of course, in the months since, I've been thinking about it more, especially how to justify it to a GM who isn't me, so I know more about it now. But I may use what I've figured out as a plot point in chapter 14, so I don't want to say any more. Okay?

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If (the Sabers knew what they were up against), they could compensate better, obviously. They still wouldn't match them for power level, but it's possible they could do reasonably well, even if the Warriors went all out. But I think if that happened, people would die on both sides.

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You're probably right. As it is, I certainly had the Sabers fighting below par; they could have done even better. Case in point: Dave Menard sent me an email last night which pointed out that Sylia -- once she realized that melee wasn't doing the job -- should have retreated to a distance and opened up with her lasers. He's right. Of course, there's nowhere on the face of the planet that she could retreat to for sniping that Hexe couldn't get to at almost the same moment, but that's irrelevant. I wrote Sylia as less intelligent than she should have been.

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Shadowwalker's sonic attack - wow. That was some very nice description there, Bob. Wow.

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Thank you. I actually wrote that passage almost four years ago, and have been waiting for the right place to plug it into the story. One of the things I wanted to do was show super powers in a "realistic" way (in as far as that was possible). The "science" in that description was one of my efforts toward that end.
And since we're on that topic, or close to it... Fairly early on I decided I wanted to let people see a little of the other Warriors, and the simulacra evolved as a way to do that. (No, he didn't have any Warriors simulacra songs in-game before that. He does now. ) After that, it was just a matter of deciding who I wanted to show. I originally had plotted two different scenes with simulacra in combat -- one featuring Shadowwalker, the other Hexe (Hexe being really there was part of it from the start). But along about chapter 5 I realized that would be repetitive and possibly even annoying for the reader. So, I decided, only one combat with simulacra in it. Which ones? And against who?
I had long known at that point that Doug and the Sabers would be having serious philosophical differences. (I mean, really... Warriors' World is really liberal about non-human sentients -- if the forgotten stuff in the back of your fridge moves, it has a decent chance of getting provisional citizenship and basic rights. Of course Doug will have a problem with the BGC world, and its heroic enforcers.) And I knew he'd have to face off against them somehow, if only for the symbolic value. I also knew that against the Sabers in a stand-up fight, Doug would quickly end up lying down. In a pool of blood. Well, at that point, it all came together. As Nene's arc developed, I threaded that into the fight as well. And from there it just sort of fell together while at the same growing. Thus it is that we now have chapter 12. Does that make any sense?

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Just how strong is Silverbolt anyway?

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Peggy confirmed that I was in the right ballpark. Silverbolt's carry capacity is approximately 25,500 pounds, or 12.75 tons.
(V&V carry capacity is a calculated quantity that can often be humorously specific: "I can lift 3,427.15 lbs, and no more!" Just to be pedantic, it's ((Strength / 10)^3 + (Endurance / 10)) * (body weight / 2) So basically, a 200-pound character with ST 10 can lift more than a 100-lb character with the same ST, all else being equal.)

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Heh. Interesting that he thought that a "startling archaicism" when that's actually her name.

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Well, in chapter 13 he listens to the recordings made by the helmet systems and realizes it's a name or nickname, but he never quite figures out the spelling.

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Of all the Sabers, Linna seems the most in control of herself at this point.

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Of all the Sabers, Linna's the only one that doesn't have an emotional investment in the "mission" of the Sabers or her view of herself relative to it.

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Nene's sampling and countering of Shadowwalker's sonar was perfect. Did she ever get 100% effect on her though?

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No, not 100%, at least against the sonic attack; she was able to overwhelm Maggie's sonar at least briefly, though, which helped Nene get the drop on her.

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Say - what pantheon is Hexe supposedly from anyway?

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Helen has specifically asked that I not say what is known in-game. So the initial, joke answer is, "I'm sorry, Citizen, that information is not available at your security clearance."
More seriously, though, see what Hexe says a moment later -- "The gods all have many faces and names." And remember that the Three are all the Triune goddesses -- not just UK&B, but also the Furies, also the Greek Fates, also the Wiccan Goddess, also Brigit/Maebh/Morrigan, etc. etc. et nauseum cetera. Think of the pantheons as "filters" fitted over the divine reality to make it easier for mortals to get a handle on them.
That being said, that passage was once a little bit longer; almost up to the final draft, it read something like this: "The gods all have many faces and names. Does it really matter which I choose? I could be the daughter of the Thunderbird and the Sky, or the anima of Poseidon, or Thor's baby sister." So the answer to your question is, "yes."

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Despite your description of who this is and their surroundings, I can't help but think of Belldandy, Urd and Skuld all sitting in front of a big screen TV with Skuld munching on a big old tub of Ice Cream. (Chuckle)

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That is a great image, and not entirely inaccurate, given the material in the answer immediately above. However, I've been having serious doubts about playing the Three for any comedy whatsoever. (I'm arguing this out with my prereaders right now, in fact.) Doug fears them, and rightly so -- as he has noted, they are among the most dangerous Powers to face, becasue of what they embody and control. I really should not be using them as a peanut gallery.
Then again, we know from another chapter that they deliberately arranged for Doug to come to the BGC world, and they have a vested interest in watching his performance. Also, is it not the occupation of gods everywhere to watch the antics of mortals and laugh at them?

I'll figure out what I really want eventually, I'm sure.

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Real world physics versus comic book physics! Actually, I suspect that's more of a nod by you to the convention actually then a mistake that Silverbolt would make.

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Exactly.

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Nene isn't angry at Shadowwalker or Doug. She's angry at herself more.

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Exactly. In a (more or less unintentional) way, Nene is a kind of touchstone for the "average person" in the BGC world (even though Linna is traditionally put in that role by fans). She knows what she believes, and she is complacent within that frame of reference. Doug comes from outside of that frame, with what is to her an utterly alien set of axioms that fit her world as well as her own, and as is noted elsewhere in this thread, she reacts badly to having her nice neat definition of the world ruptured and expanded. What makes it worse for her is that if she's wrong, she's been actively evil by her own morality. She hasn't, mind you -- she's a small-w warrior, fighting a war to protect those who can't protect themselves -- something that Doug has yet to realize, because he, too, is limited by his preconceptions. Doug's definition of the Sabers as "slavehunters" is as uncomplicated and incorrect as Nene's definition of them as "shining heroes"; the truth is somewhere in between, and it's doubtful Doug will have the time to realize that.

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When you can question what you've done, you aren't evil. As you yourself have mentioned in another thread. (Harry Potter story fragment I think))

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Correct. The realization Nene must reach to come to peace with herself is that yes, boomers are people, but no, she is not a murderer because she was acting in the defense of herself, her friends, and the people of the city. She has to make the mental transition from thinking of herself as a "hero" to thinking of herself as a "soldier". Which, weirdly enough, is the distinction between the JLA and the Warriors, as you've noted.

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Technical question - shouldn't her outside visor flip up instead?

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Yes. But I've never seen them "automatically" flip up on a suit -- they've always been manually opened. And I needed Sylia to be able to see still after Hexe shut down her suit. Think of it as another "fifth generation" design feature.

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Sorry. Game geeking for a moment there. ^_^

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No problem.

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Okay, I have to know what's the story behind this. I figure a mutation of some sort.

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Yes, Shadowwalker is a mutant -- born that way.

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But does the fur actually have anything to do with her senses?

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It is, in fact, part of the reception system for her sonar. "Fur" is a misnomer, but Nene's in no position to make accurate observations at the moment; they're very, very fine hairs that function relative to sound much like a cat's whiskers. They handle almost all of the passive aspect of her sonar, as well as some of the active.

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Did she grow up this way? How did it affect her life?

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Best quick answer I can give you is go to www.eclipse.net/~rms/istc...ightscream -- this rejected IST character, as I note in the Concordance, was very loosely based on Shadowwalker. While the powers are somewhat different, the character history is pretty close to Maggie's.

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Seems like it would look _very_ disturbing.

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Nene certainly thought so; but it's something you can get used to.

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She must wear sunglasses all the time.

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Peggy has instructed me to direct you to the "Shadowwalker off-duty" drawing in the gallery section of the DW main page.

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And that was about my reaction as well. Very nice way to bring one of the real Warriors in unexpectedly.

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The Hexe scene -- at least as far as "I *am* here", was also written years ago. I had always felt that with the amount of talking about the other Warriors I knew Doug would do, it was only fair to give the readers a decent payoff. Again, to be completely honest, as I note above this was written with the intent of it being a completely different scene from Shadowwalker's. It was only about two years ago that I decided to merge them into one.

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Well, this is getting rather long. I'll have more commentary in return to comments back.

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Well, here are my comments back. I hope you write some more -- I'd love to see your thoughts on Hexe dressing down Doug, and chatting with Lisa. In any case, thanks again for reading and commenting.
(Wow, I finished. Cool. Of course, I wrote this all off-line over the course of the day, but still...)
-- Bob
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Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.