[Story][Season 2]The gas station (finished)

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[Story][Season 2]The gas station (finished)

Ace Dreamer
Unregistered

#21

08-26-2012, 12:28 PM

Sounds good. A bit improvement. Couple of very minor niggles:

‘Safe Earth, not wreck Mars!”

should that be "Save Earth, not Wreck Mars!"?

And I think "A woman with green hairs" probably wants "green hair".
--
"It is the business of the future to be dangerous" - Hawkwind

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[Story][Season 2]The gas station (finished) - by HRogge - 06-10-2012, 09:16 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 06-10-2012, 11:25 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 06-11-2012, 02:50 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 06-11-2012, 06:29 PM

[No subject] - by shaderic - 06-11-2012, 09:18 PM

[No subject] - by Cobalt Greywalker - 06-11-2012, 11:04 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 06-12-2012, 07:45 AM

[No subject] - by M Fnord - 06-12-2012, 03:25 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 06-12-2012, 04:32 PM

[No subject] - by Dartz - 06-12-2012, 07:19 PM

[No subject] - by Cobalt Greywalker - 06-12-2012, 11:49 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 06-13-2012, 05:23 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 06-13-2012, 06:12 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 06-13-2012, 06:31 PM

[No subject] - by Norgarth - 06-14-2012, 12:58 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-19-2012, 02:05 AM

[No subject] - by Black Aeronaut - 08-20-2012, 12:49 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-20-2012, 10:32 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-21-2012, 10:21 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-26-2012, 10:11 AM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 08-26-2012, 12:28 PM

[No subject] - by LynnInDenver - 08-26-2012, 05:38 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-26-2012, 09:50 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-27-2012, 10:35 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 08-28-2012, 09:01 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-29-2012, 06:21 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-31-2012, 05:33 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 08-31-2012, 07:31 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 08-31-2012, 07:34 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-01-2012, 04:30 PM

[No subject] - by Rakhasa - 09-01-2012, 04:43 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-01-2012, 04:47 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-01-2012, 06:22 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-01-2012, 06:51 PM

[No subject] - by Rakhasa - 09-01-2012, 07:27 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-01-2012, 07:37 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-02-2012, 02:11 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-05-2012, 09:57 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-06-2012, 12:29 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-06-2012, 06:25 PM

[No subject] - by ECSNorway - 09-06-2012, 06:55 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-06-2012, 07:07 PM

[No subject] - by Star Ranger4 - 09-06-2012, 08:35 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-06-2012, 08:45 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-09-2012, 07:13 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-14-2012, 05:37 PM

[No subject] - by Star Ranger4 - 09-14-2012, 05:41 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-14-2012, 05:45 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-16-2012, 07:54 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 09-17-2012, 01:14 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-17-2012, 07:41 AM

[No subject] - by Rakhasa - 09-17-2012, 09:40 AM

[No subject] - by Star Ranger4 - 09-17-2012, 04:18 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-17-2012, 04:51 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-17-2012, 05:35 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-17-2012, 05:39 PM

[No subject] - by Rakhasa - 09-17-2012, 05:56 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-17-2012, 05:59 PM

[No subject] - by Star Ranger4 - 09-17-2012, 06:09 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-17-2012, 06:47 PM

[No subject] - by ECSNorway - 09-18-2012, 10:28 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-19-2012, 08:45 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-20-2012, 12:10 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-23-2012, 03:48 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-23-2012, 05:53 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-23-2012, 06:03 PM

[No subject] - by Dartz - 09-23-2012, 06:30 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-23-2012, 07:46 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 09-23-2012, 08:59 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-23-2012, 09:49 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-23-2012, 10:08 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-24-2012, 12:36 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-25-2012, 08:23 PM

[No subject] - by Cobalt Greywalker - 09-25-2012, 10:57 PM

[No subject] - by Rakhasa - 09-25-2012, 11:16 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-26-2012, 06:49 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-28-2012, 05:21 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 09-30-2012, 01:41 PM

[No subject] - by Ace Dreamer - 09-30-2012, 02:16 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 10-27-2012, 08:25 AM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 10-27-2012, 03:55 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 10-27-2012, 04:09 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 10-27-2012, 08:55 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 10-27-2012, 10:10 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 10-27-2012, 11:56 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 10-30-2012, 10:10 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 11-03-2012, 11:43 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 11-11-2012, 11:54 PM

[No subject] - by robkelk - 11-12-2012, 02:53 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 11-20-2012, 08:22 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 12-10-2012, 09:33 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 01-18-2013, 11:52 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-23-2013, 11:18 PM

[No subject] - by Dartz - 03-24-2013, 12:24 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-25-2013, 09:24 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-27-2013, 12:37 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-28-2013, 10:11 AM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-29-2013, 09:49 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 03-29-2013, 09:50 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 04-05-2013, 08:45 PM

[No subject] - by HRogge - 04-09-2013, 08:35 PM

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