I was amazed how fast I managed to lock it down.
Of course, I had help I hadn't expected. As I was working out mental techniques for locking the shapeshifting down - so I wouldn't do things like shift
in my sleep and stuff - I found myself repeating exercises Cassie had taught me to focus my awareness. This of course freaked me right out like you
wouldn't believe. I had memories of Paragon City... but they were fairly sparse. Atlas park, and that giant statue of Atlas, who'd sacrificed his life
defending the world from the Nazi invasion. Always an uplifting experience. The costume contests were fun, but honestly, I can say my favorite memories were
just hitching up on the side of the plaza with a picnic lunch, and watching the costumed heroes zip by.
"Damnit, focus," I growled. That wasn't me, and they weren't my memories. They were filler, created
out of who knew where by who knew who.
Certainly not the world around me. I don't have cable, so I don't watch a lot of TV. So I really didn't clue in at first that this wasn't just
me. But eventually I checked out the CBC site online, and sure enough, this had happened to hundreds of other players.
It was estimated that the count might be in the thousands, but not all those affected had come forward. Like me.
I'd like to say I didn't announce what I was capable of because I was worried about how my family would react. Or how it might affect my return to
school soon. Or a hundred other possible reasons. But the real reason? I was scared. I had the ability to hide what
happened behind a veil of normalcy. so I didn't want to tell anyone. And frankly, I had more than a few nervous
images of traditional MIB's showing up to whisk me away to secret government labs for heinous research experiments, never to be heard from again.
Okay. Breathe. You're not going to wind up in a lab somewhere. In... Out... That's better.
The kicker were the third set of memories. I mentioned a while back that I'd made this character for an old game I'd played in. Well, that game had run
for several years, and by the time it concluded, we'd become a quasi-illegal action team responsible for saving
the whole world and toppling several major western governments in the process. And I had those memories in my head
too. And that was another issue to deal with. Since I'd specifically built Kara initially as a bit of a basket case. I didn't understand the game
system at the time I built her, so I arranged it so that I could learn the system slowly, as her mind was repaired by a very loving telepath named Cassandra.
By the end of the game, Kara had been in a permanent mindlink with her. And in some strange, ethereal dimension of my cortex, a part of me knew it was supposed
to be there and it wasn't.
So yeah, the mental exercises were very necessary. I spent several days just getting my head together before I tried venturing outside to face the world.
Did I do anything memorable during that time? Well, actually... yeah. I'd called my best friend. I wanted to sound him out on what I should tell friends
and family. I trusted him totally. It went something like this:
"Ah... You know that thing they're going on about on TV? About the whole City of Heroes incident?"
A pause on the phone. "Were you affected?"
"Yep."
Another pause. "You sound normal. What happened?"
"I got an old character I made. Kara. You know, from the old Evil Marvel game. She shapeshifts, so I guess I caught a break there."
"Hmm... What are you going to do about it?"
"Damned if I know. I was just wondering how I'd go about telling the family about this."
"I wouldn't, actually. Don't tell them anything. At least, not right away. And if she shapeshifts, you might want to have some kind of alternate
image to show them. Something they'll accept."
I sighed. "Probably a good idea."
The rest you can guess. Which leaves me where I am now. I remember how Foxfire patrolled Paragon and the Hollows before the accident. I recall how Kara trained
to overthrow the infiltrated Western forces, led by the seemingly invincible Shadow King. And I know I can effortlessly kick ass in several exotic flavors. But
in both realities, I had either one hell of a medical plan, or armor made by a party member who also owned most of Yamaha Heavy Industries. Lacking that, I
needed armor. Or the first two-bit thug in a back alley with a gun would kill me.
I recalled something I could do in one set of memories. When Kara had been part of the apocalyptic group who called themselves the Chronos Cell. Energy form.
Living electricity. I even remembered how I did it.
The mere thought of doing this scared the crap out of me. It would be a long time before I had the guts to try it...
---
Those who fear the darkness have never seen what the light can do.
Of course, I had help I hadn't expected. As I was working out mental techniques for locking the shapeshifting down - so I wouldn't do things like shift
in my sleep and stuff - I found myself repeating exercises Cassie had taught me to focus my awareness. This of course freaked me right out like you
wouldn't believe. I had memories of Paragon City... but they were fairly sparse. Atlas park, and that giant statue of Atlas, who'd sacrificed his life
defending the world from the Nazi invasion. Always an uplifting experience. The costume contests were fun, but honestly, I can say my favorite memories were
just hitching up on the side of the plaza with a picnic lunch, and watching the costumed heroes zip by.
"Damnit, focus," I growled. That wasn't me, and they weren't my memories. They were filler, created
out of who knew where by who knew who.
Certainly not the world around me. I don't have cable, so I don't watch a lot of TV. So I really didn't clue in at first that this wasn't just
me. But eventually I checked out the CBC site online, and sure enough, this had happened to hundreds of other players.
It was estimated that the count might be in the thousands, but not all those affected had come forward. Like me.
I'd like to say I didn't announce what I was capable of because I was worried about how my family would react. Or how it might affect my return to
school soon. Or a hundred other possible reasons. But the real reason? I was scared. I had the ability to hide what
happened behind a veil of normalcy. so I didn't want to tell anyone. And frankly, I had more than a few nervous
images of traditional MIB's showing up to whisk me away to secret government labs for heinous research experiments, never to be heard from again.
Okay. Breathe. You're not going to wind up in a lab somewhere. In... Out... That's better.
The kicker were the third set of memories. I mentioned a while back that I'd made this character for an old game I'd played in. Well, that game had run
for several years, and by the time it concluded, we'd become a quasi-illegal action team responsible for saving
the whole world and toppling several major western governments in the process. And I had those memories in my head
too. And that was another issue to deal with. Since I'd specifically built Kara initially as a bit of a basket case. I didn't understand the game
system at the time I built her, so I arranged it so that I could learn the system slowly, as her mind was repaired by a very loving telepath named Cassandra.
By the end of the game, Kara had been in a permanent mindlink with her. And in some strange, ethereal dimension of my cortex, a part of me knew it was supposed
to be there and it wasn't.
So yeah, the mental exercises were very necessary. I spent several days just getting my head together before I tried venturing outside to face the world.
Did I do anything memorable during that time? Well, actually... yeah. I'd called my best friend. I wanted to sound him out on what I should tell friends
and family. I trusted him totally. It went something like this:
"Ah... You know that thing they're going on about on TV? About the whole City of Heroes incident?"
A pause on the phone. "Were you affected?"
"Yep."
Another pause. "You sound normal. What happened?"
"I got an old character I made. Kara. You know, from the old Evil Marvel game. She shapeshifts, so I guess I caught a break there."
"Hmm... What are you going to do about it?"
"Damned if I know. I was just wondering how I'd go about telling the family about this."
"I wouldn't, actually. Don't tell them anything. At least, not right away. And if she shapeshifts, you might want to have some kind of alternate
image to show them. Something they'll accept."
I sighed. "Probably a good idea."
The rest you can guess. Which leaves me where I am now. I remember how Foxfire patrolled Paragon and the Hollows before the accident. I recall how Kara trained
to overthrow the infiltrated Western forces, led by the seemingly invincible Shadow King. And I know I can effortlessly kick ass in several exotic flavors. But
in both realities, I had either one hell of a medical plan, or armor made by a party member who also owned most of Yamaha Heavy Industries. Lacking that, I
needed armor. Or the first two-bit thug in a back alley with a gun would kill me.
I recalled something I could do in one set of memories. When Kara had been part of the apocalyptic group who called themselves the Chronos Cell. Energy form.
Living electricity. I even remembered how I did it.
The mere thought of doing this scared the crap out of me. It would be a long time before I had the guts to try it...
---
Those who fear the darkness have never seen what the light can do.