[Side note: Did some posts in this thread go away? I could have sworn I saw 2 pages in this thread before, but as I'm writing this there's only one.]
Hmmmm.
I'm generally a fan of Skysaber's work, just because he seems to be one of a very limited number of SI authors who are willing to just *have fun* with things.
This one... the first chapter, at least, is not quite up to the standard. (I'm not sure it'd really be considered Carrot-style, since Lockhart's *personality* isn't really there.)
Him knowing Hermione's name doesn't seem that off, because it could be explained simply - someone pointed her out. Murdering the Dursleys... probably more than they've earned. Certainly more than for Dudley, who seemed to show some signs of actual rationality in book 7.
The main problem though is it's just too much stuff being done in too short a period of time. It might be in-character for him to do that. And given the level of advance information he has (since the rule seems to be "Anything shown in the books -will- happen unless something is done to change it"), being able to pull it off might be reasonable. But in terms of telling a story, it's just too rushed.
(Also, I don't quite follow why he's so horrified about what Hermione did to her parents in book 7. After all, the plan was always to *undo* it once it was safe...)
The part that really freaks me out is the wholesale memory-editing. Using the memories that Lockhart had stolen is one thing - he had no way to undo it, better to have *some* good come out of the whole thing. But rewriting people's history is another thing, even with their permission. And I find the logic supporting that whole thing more dubious than even that behind killing the Dursleys.
...And here's the part where I have to go to bed. Though I still have more things to say. Tomorrow, I might actually say them. '.'
-Morgan."Mikuru-chan molested me! I'm... so happy!"
-Haruhi, "The Ecchi of Haruhi Suzumiya"
---(Not really)
Hmmmm.
I'm generally a fan of Skysaber's work, just because he seems to be one of a very limited number of SI authors who are willing to just *have fun* with things.
This one... the first chapter, at least, is not quite up to the standard. (I'm not sure it'd really be considered Carrot-style, since Lockhart's *personality* isn't really there.)
Him knowing Hermione's name doesn't seem that off, because it could be explained simply - someone pointed her out. Murdering the Dursleys... probably more than they've earned. Certainly more than for Dudley, who seemed to show some signs of actual rationality in book 7.
The main problem though is it's just too much stuff being done in too short a period of time. It might be in-character for him to do that. And given the level of advance information he has (since the rule seems to be "Anything shown in the books -will- happen unless something is done to change it"), being able to pull it off might be reasonable. But in terms of telling a story, it's just too rushed.
(Also, I don't quite follow why he's so horrified about what Hermione did to her parents in book 7. After all, the plan was always to *undo* it once it was safe...)
The part that really freaks me out is the wholesale memory-editing. Using the memories that Lockhart had stolen is one thing - he had no way to undo it, better to have *some* good come out of the whole thing. But rewriting people's history is another thing, even with their permission. And I find the logic supporting that whole thing more dubious than even that behind killing the Dursleys.
...And here's the part where I have to go to bed. Though I still have more things to say. Tomorrow, I might actually say them. '.'
-Morgan."Mikuru-chan molested me! I'm... so happy!"
-Haruhi, "The Ecchi of Haruhi Suzumiya"
---(Not really)