Neon Genesis Schick

[robkelk]

Spun off from Crossovers That Should Not Be XIV...

I'm scared...

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Those Who Shave Angels: introducing the new six bladed progressive safety razor.

... Damn it Japan! I was better off with the gone-when-i-turn-my-head tentacles!
- CD, anything that makes Gendo smile like that, I want to be far, far away from....

Nah. It just means that all his obssessive craziness was in his beard. Or that the anti-psychotics in the shaving cream have taken effect.
  

... Damn it Japan! I was better off with the gone-when-i-turn-my-head tentacles!
- CD, anything that makes Gendo smile like that, I want to be far, far away from....

Nah. It just means that all his obssessive craziness was in his beard. Or that the anti-psychotics in the shaving cream have taken effect.
  

What do you mean, "shaving cream"? Wasn't that LCL?

Judging by Rei's face that add is from the alt world of episodes 25-26 or something... actually probably Asuka's alt world were Kaji lives and Gendo's beard dies.

Ladies and Gentlemen,
I think you are over reacting and or making incorrect assumptions.

1) I generally feel better when I am clean shaven. (But correlation does not prove causation.)
2) These people are obviously happy purely from the quality of their shaving experience.
3) Yes, I guess this does include the girls. No, I don't care to think about that.
4) There are many varieties of LCL across fanfic. I figure at least one of them must be useful as a really good shaving lubricant. Also, others for other personal purposes that I don't care to think about.
5) If I am a good model for Gendo Ikari, I can think of at least one thing to make him smile like that might not be all that offensive to experience.
a) Go to the reading room of the Miskatonic University Library.
b) Read, cover to cover, a particular biography of Mao Zedong. If need be, get the copy in the special collection with the Krummerman and Sheng glosses.
c) Fail the roll to disbelieve.
d) Check yourself into Arkham to help recover.
e) Recover, with or without the help of The Batman.
f) Realize, that as Mao took over entirely around 1950, and died in the mid 1970s, and this is 2012 at the earliest, even if you live in the People's Republic of China, it isn't the People's Republic of China as ruled by a living Mao Zedong.
g) If you are anything like me, or Gendo Ikari, this will make you more than that happy, all other things being the same.
h) This isn't anything too uncomfortable, as long as you are not a wimp with your reading material, unwilling to understand uncomfortable things, or in need of help when recovering SAN loss. (Because being institutionalized would be annoying.)

'Ritsuko Akagi, the truth is, I really do not like Mao Zedong.'

'Heh. You liar.'

BAAM

6) More seriously, there are a lot of things, not really objectionable to anybody, that would make anybody that happy. Like a really enjoyable shave.
7) I, personally, would not care for the described shaving experience. I consider a a shaving method as I would a tool. I prefer that tools do the job well, with the minimum of fuss, attention, and bother. If something is very much enjoyable in of itself, it entirely defeats this quality of being a good tool.
8) Gendo being clean shaven makes him totally better, like the Romans who we got the clean shaven mores from.
a) The Romans are great, and their greatness should be imitated.
b) Shaving was one of the few personal habits of the Romans that wasn't vile.
c) Safety razors are totally better than whatever it is that the Romans used.
d) Still, I probably wouldn't care for whatever fancy kind Schick is trying to sell here. I prefer the cheaper ones, and bar handsoap or plain water is less of a hassle than cream or gel.
9) I wanna go shave.

If I didn't manage to hit somebody's 'Should Not Be' reaction yet, well, we've secretly replaced your shaving or other personal lubricant of choice with LCL from Sic Semper Morituri. Let's see if you notice.

Note that LCL from Sic Semper Morituri is a fairly hazardous substance, and it says something about somebody when they don't die on contact.

Not a fanfic crossover, but I'd say that a diesel-electric shaver would be one of those devices that is very unlikely to be worth engineering.

It's a commonly held axiom that everything can be improved be adding more chainsaws. Therefore Gendo is clearly smiling because he replaced the blades of your razor with chainsaws.

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[robkelk]

2) These people are obviously happy purely from the quality of their shaving experience.
3) Yes, I guess this does include the girls. No, I don't care to think about that.

They've got legs / they know how to shave them...
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Necratoid]

Actually, the reason for the shaving fixation is that most guys can't grow anything like a full beard worth anything... in highschool of a sample of 5-600 guys literally two people in the school could actually grow them.  Beards use to be signs of masculinity and virility.  Beards were a sign of manliness... having a beard was a good thing.  Peach fuzz, antibeards (where everywhere, but the basic beard growth places grows a beard), scraggly, patchy not beards and such were signs of a lesser man.  Distinctive and well groomed facial hair was often a sign of notable historical figures.
Then the eugenics movement comes around and decides humans should be breed for traits, because it worked so well on cattle and the like (their words not mine).  One of the traits they decided was disposable was beards (at least in the North East of the US blond guys are horriblly bad at growing beards).  They loved those smooth faced, near identical drones.  Individually must be breed out of the population for the greater good.  Except Hilter (not Godwins law being invoked and he was rather distinctly a major hypocrit on these things) and his snot-catcher... I literally can't think of a eugenicist that wasn't completely clean shaven.
So I would take the sign of Gendo Ikari (with a distinctive beard he always is canon) shaving his beard off in canon Evaverse as a sign of very, very bad things... like bowing out to SEELE's demands or that he really, really needed funding and the excitement is faked so he can keep things going financially.  So this in canon Evaverse would be a sign of the world being very, very, very screwed.
Which is one of the reasons I said episode 25-26 altverse was where that was happening... Rei is WAY too emotional there for her to ever fake things.  Being Asuka's escape world makes sense and her killing the beard is entirely in character for her crazy.

[Jorlem]

I still think this should not be, it's just that we can't look away or stop talking about it. It's like a car crash, sort of.
-----
Stand between the Silver Crystal and the Golden Sea.
"Youngsters these days just have no appreciation for the magnificence of the legendary cucumber."  --Krityan Elder, Tales of Vesperia.

[Dartz]

All i can think of is a horrible, horrible joke that's going into the next chapter of my Evafic.
________________________________
--m(^0^)m-- Wot, no sig?

[Foxboy]

I juscht can't handle Schick humour.
''We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat
them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.''

-- James Nicoll