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[OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
True that.

And I just noticed a continuity glitch - Rob wasn't in Ottawa when he took Ben's call on the 16th - he was in Prescott, and he'd sent the Misaka Sisters and Accelerator to San Antonio with Washuu less that two hours previously. Fixing... EDIT: ... and fixed, with the stories now cross-linked.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
So... now that one holiday is out of the way, we can think about the next internationally-recognized holiday. Smile

Yes, the wiki page for the 2016 Christmas party has been up for a while, but I added to it while the forum was on downtime. (Yes, I know that story is low on my priority list. Think of it as adding a note to the devfile.)
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
I've got it open in a browser tab, and I'm only halfway through it -- I'm just past the point where Fate and Nanoha arrive at the party.
-- Bob

I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh, Clark Kent, Mary Sue, DJ Croft, Skysaber.  I have been 
called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the sun grows dim and cold....
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(10-31-2019, 07:12 PM)robkelk Wrote:
(10-30-2019, 08:29 PM)robkelk Wrote: It's up.
No feedback?

It's been one hour short of a full day, and the forum says it's been viewed 16 times. I'm only one of those 16 - specifically, the first one. There aren't that many search engines out there indexing the forum (I think); somebody else has to have looked at it.

No praise, no complaints - was the story really so boring that it didn't elicit any reactions at all? Did I do that bad a job as an editor?
Still haven't finished reading it (though it's open in another window, at the start of Coyote's story). Working afternoon shift this week. plus had a bit of trouble connecting to the board last night when I got home.
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
And done. The arc welding was well done, and the new material all very good. There were a couple spelling/grammar errors, but I didn't log them; but they were very few. I did have one continuity concern that only manifested itself when I saw everything together... I think it was when Ben stops Rei, he's by himself, but he'd had his Naonha/Fate moment not long before -- why aren't they shadowing him? Why are they leaving him alone?
-- Bob

I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh, Clark Kent, Mary Sue, DJ Croft, Skysaber.  I have been 
called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the sun grows dim and cold....
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Doylist: Because they weren't in the story yet when that scene was written.
Watsonian: Er... maybe they were off meeting other people?
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
You know what else we forgot to put into the Halloween story?

Athena didn't get to sing.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
commentary about the Halloween story:
Quote:"I do have one question though: It's not going to be a Buffy Halloween, is it?"

Ben groused, "Why does everyone ask me that question?"
How would Ben know if it was going to be a 'Buffy Halloween', it's not something one delibritely intends to inflict on oneself.
(hmm, speaking of which, perhaps the LA group should keep an eye out for a certain town popping up along the coast...)

Quote:Makoto held up a card. "This says it's a dance gown worn by somebody named Sarah in a movie that I haven't seen."
I suspect the Inners would enjoy Labyrinth.

Quote:Mira quietly thanked Brent – being in her "The Mirror" card form, she couldn't actually say it – for suggesting that she read that particular Discworld novel, turned her awareness inward, and started looking through the mirrors that were her namesake.
Out of curiousity, which Diskworld novel is this referencing?

(Spoilered for size)
Quote:Ben nodded as he dialed Minako's phone. "If things do get dicey, I want you and Ami to come in. If it's a hot situation, transform first. But if it can still be managed without resorting to violence, come in as you are and help me get out of that situation. Are we clear?"

"Absolutely," said Ami.

"Like glass," chirped Minako.

"You mean 'like crystal'." Yomi clarified.

Minako shook her head. "I've seen Crystal Tokyo. This isn't like that."
Minako has a point

unfortunately I forgot to copy stuff over for a while, and that's a long story even to skim through... Blush

Quote:A chorus of "byes" later, and the van emerged from the parking lot, headed for the interstate, and set off towards the desert country. It would become the greatest tour of the American Southwest undertaken by Martians since 1947.
So, are they scheduled to visit Roswell? Tongue
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-02-2019, 12:08 PM)Norgarth Wrote:
Quote:Makoto held up a card. "This says it's a dance gown worn by somebody named Sarah in a movie that I haven't seen."
I suspect the Inners would enjoy Labyrinth.

I suspect they would... but nobody's shown it to them yet.


(11-02-2019, 12:08 PM)Norgarth Wrote:
Quote:Mira quietly thanked Brent – being in her "The Mirror" card form, she couldn't actually say it – for suggesting that she read that particular Discworld novel, turned her awareness inward, and started looking through the mirrors that were her namesake.
Out of curiousity, which Diskworld novel is this referencing?

Witches Abroad. Mirror magic is very potent... and very risky, to the point where Granny Weatherwax hesitates to use it. Mira is a mirror, though, so the risks are reduced for her.

EDIT: And mirrors are associated with Belldandy, too.

RE-EDIT: I've added a mention to the concordance on the wiki.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-02-2019, 10:43 AM)robkelk Wrote: You know what else we forgot to put into the Halloween story?

Athena didn't get to sing.

We also didn't introduce Ms. Testarossa to Ms. Testarossa on-screen. Aargh!
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-02-2019, 07:42 PM)robkelk Wrote: Norgarth
[quote pid='186437' dateline='1572714512']
Quote:Mira quietly thanked Brent – being in her "The Mirror" card form, she couldn't actually say it – for suggesting that she read that particular Discworld novel, turned her awareness inward, and started looking through the mirrors that were her namesake.
Out of curiousity, which Diskworld novel is this referencing?

Witches Abroad. Mirror magic is very potent... and very risky, to the point where Granny Weatherwax hesitates to use it. Mira is a mirror, though, so the risks are reduced for her.

EDIT: And mirrors are associated with Belldandy, too.

RE-EDIT: I've added a mention to the concordance on the wiki.
[/quote]
Ah, I haven't read that one Smile
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-02-2019, 10:15 PM)robkelk Wrote:
(11-02-2019, 10:43 AM)robkelk Wrote: You know what else we forgot to put into the Halloween story?

Athena didn't get to sing.

We also didn't introduce Ms. Testarossa to Ms. Testarossa on-screen. Aargh!

Yeah, didn't feel like pointing that out so close to the deadline.  Just relax - the primary objective is accomplished and we can introduce minor fixes as we go along.  Unlike print, digital mediums can be amended easily.  We just need to note the changes, which Wikis are built to do.  (Although I think an appendix that details changes made after the "publication" and why they were made wouldn't be a bad idea.)
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
The story already has a change to its protection level logged with a note that it had been published, so that's not an issue.

Changing gears... Labster, I noticed that Meta has a menu option to make a book. Any way we can get that on the TNB wiki? I didn't see anything that might have been the right thing to activate in the extensions list.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-04-2019, 03:24 AM)Black Aeronaut Wrote: ...
(11-02-2019, 10:15 PM)robkelk Wrote: We also didn't introduce Ms. Testarossa to Ms. Testarossa on-screen. Aargh!

Yeah, didn't feel like pointing that out so close to the deadline.  Just relax - the primary objective is accomplished and we can introduce minor fixes as we go along. ...

Like so:

She showed him the Canadian Smarties, and in all seriousness answered, "Chocolate."



Kazari waved at the newcomers. "Hello! Do you have a moment?"

Nanoha and Fate walked over to her. "We're meeting everybody right now," Fate replied.

"But we haven't met you yet. I'm Nanoha Takamachi."

"Kazari Uiharu. I'm pleased to meet you."

"Fate Testarossa. I'm happy to make your acquaintance."

"Oh! Have you met a girl a few years older than me, with gray eyes?"

Nanoha and Fate looked at each other, then Nanoha replied, "Not yet."

Kazari smiled impishly. "Then I get to introduce you." She waved the gray-eyed girl over.

"What is it, Ms... Uiharu, wasn't it?"

"Yes. There's somebody here I'd like you to meet. Fate Testarossa, this is Teletha Testarossa."

They all looked surprised, then Nanoha grinned. "I see why you wanted them to meet."

Nearby, Osaka turned to Tomo. "I wonder whether they're related."


--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
One thing that occurred to me is that Teletha is probably going to twig very quickly to the fact that Fate and Nanoha are insanely intelligent because in order to do their magic, they have to have a working grasp of algebra and calculus.

What will be even more fun is that they don't even realize this themselves. To them, all this math in the Midchildan notation system is just magical spells.

Then Teletha will lower the boom and completely rock their world as they come to grips with just how exceptional they really are.

Oh. And also, Teletha dragging Nanoha bodily over to Washu-chan...

"WASHU-CHAN! NANOHA CAN MULTITASK!"

"Are you certain of that? You should know that true multitasking is-"

"This whole time she's been running combat simulations with Raising Heart while talking to everyone here."

"..... Nanoha, dear? If you don't mind I'd like to get a DNA sample from you. So could you open your mouth so I can get a cheek swab?"

I can throw all this into the Halloween side-story. Thoughts?
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Do it.

(Oh, and if you can give Auska some screen time, I'd appreciate it. That's somebody else who we forgot to put into the story.)
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(10-22-2019, 08:11 PM)robkelk Wrote: Slight topic change: I just sent an email to somebody I know who's at least somewhat interested in getting back into writing fanfic. We'll see whether anything comes of it.

Something has come of it.

He's very busy at the moment, so we might not see anything from him for a few months... and he'll be more likely to kibitz and preread to begin with.


(10-30-2019, 08:36 PM)robkelk Wrote: Okay, next on my list is "finish the story where the first really big fight takes place". Then I work on the third fun get-together (skating in January 2017), then the second fun get-together (Christmas 2016). Then it's the Arc 5 story that I have on the go... and by the time that's done, maybe everybody else will be ready to go with Arc 2 and I can work on the two stories I've got for that arc.

My muse insists on poking me about skating in January... so take this order with a big halite crystal.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Okay, who had Rayearth?

Pictures: https://www.animenewsnetwork.com/feature...th/.153115
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Just checking in.  I haven't been up to much, but I'm still writing.  I was trying to write later in the story, but I seem to have gravitated back to mid-October, giving some context on how we got to the "Brent is buried in sand" scene.

I'm having a few ideas that I'm not sure are very good ones:
* Would Jayne be interested in GamerGate (given that his actor coined the term)?
* Does Donald Trump have a shard of the mirror in his body?
* Could there be another displacee house on the island of Corfu, run by Louisa Durrell?

The last one is inspired by the recently finished TV series, The Durrells, and all of the characters in it are strong.  But it's kind of a weird case, because they were all real people, who lived and died in the last century (excepting Margo, who lived to 2007).  And three of the four siblings wrote about their experiences on the island, each somewhat fictionalized.  The TV series is even more fictionalized.  Plus there's the whole practicality thing of it of me not knowing all that much about Greece.  But the idea of a displaced boarding house (and zoo!) housing displacees still has its appeal to me.
"Kitto daijoubu da yo." - Sakura Kinomoto
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Ever wonder where Hallmark finds those "old-style" neighbourhoods near water, to serve as settings for their holiday movies? Apparently, they find at least some of them near Ottawa. (link 1 and link 2)

So, yes, Minako and Mimi have a chance at getting some acting work in the area.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-12-2019, 05:05 PM)Labster Wrote: Just checking in.  I haven't been up to much, but I'm still writing.  I was trying to write later in the story, but I seem to have gravitated back to mid-October, giving some context on how we got to the "Brent is buried in sand" scene.

I'm having a few ideas that I'm not sure are very good ones:
* Would Jayne be interested in GamerGate (given that his actor coined the term)?

Would Jayne care about video games?


(11-12-2019, 05:05 PM)Labster Wrote: * Does Donald Trump have a shard of the mirror in his body?

I refer you to Hanlon's Razor.


(11-12-2019, 05:05 PM)Labster Wrote: * Could there be another displacee house on the island of Corfu, run by Louisa Durrell?

The last one is inspired by the recently finished TV series, The Durrells, and all of the characters in it are strong.  But it's kind of a weird case, because they were all real people, who lived and died in the last century (excepting Margo, who lived to 2007).  And three of the four siblings wrote about their experiences on the island, each somewhat fictionalized.  The TV series is even more fictionalized.  Plus there's the whole practicality thing of it of me not knowing all that much about Greece.  But the idea of a displaced boarding house (and zoo!) housing displacees still has its appeal to me.

It would be extremely odd if displacees were appearing only in Ireland, the UK, North America, and the middle of the ocean.

Sure, why not?
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
(11-12-2019, 07:46 PM)robkelk Wrote: Would Jayne care about video games?
I could see him getting into a few FPSes.

(11-12-2019, 07:46 PM)robkelk Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 05:05 PM)Labster Wrote: * Does Donald Trump have a shard of the mirror in his body?

I refer you to Hanlon's Razor.

I don't see the relevance.  The obsidian mirror has nothing to do with malice or stupidity.  It's smoky, distorted visions of reality of the kind seen in The Snow Queen combined with the Aztec ideal of a ruler.  I'd say Trump does very well at both.
"Kitto daijoubu da yo." - Sakura Kinomoto
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
I was doing a wiki-walk and stumbled upon an Irish town... Have 33-Stars played the second-largest town in County Monaghan?

I'm thinking that the similarity of names between that town and a certain well-known franchise might call some displacees to it.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
The best way to see Carrick' is through the bombsight of the Enola Gay.

I love the smell of rotaries in the morning. You know one time, I got to work early, before the rush hour. I walked through the empty carpark, I didn't see one bloody Prius or Golf. And that smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole carpark, smelled like.... ....speed.

One day they're going to ban them.
RE: [OOC][PLOT] The Fifth Thread of Planning for Arc 1 - Arrivals
Dartz, I haven't had the chance to say it lately, but that last post in The Ghost Inside is really good.  You really share the feeling of coming to terms with yourself.

My one complaint is to check the line endings, all the way through.  There are a lot with no period, or two periods, or this:

Nam sat on the floor in front of the television, blasting her way through a game against a

Don't leave me hangin', man.
"Kitto daijoubu da yo." - Sakura Kinomoto


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