Silly Idea...

[Cobalt Greywalker]

We know the Professor is essentially powered by caffeine, but what would happen if he was to drink Klatchian Coffee?

[Valles]

The Singularity.

===============================================
"I'm terribly sorry, but I have to kill you quite horribly now."

[robkelk]

Oh, dear Belldandy.
Of course, you know somebody's going to have to tell this one. Maybe even me. (I've currently got a scene slated for chapter two of Legend of Galactic Girls where The Professor shows up and manages to out-tech Skuld in an inpromptu "Iron Inventor" match - Klatchian coffee could explain why he managed to pull that off.)
(Which works The Watch into the story, at least as a mention. I'll have to remember to credit Vangeek as the originator of the idea...)

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[CattyNebulart]

oh my. I do hope you write it, I would love to read it. And the mind boggeling results of the Iron Inventor match.
E: "Did they... did they just endorse the combination of the JSDF and US Army by showing them as two lesbian lolicons moving in together and holding hands and talking about how 'intimate' they were?"
B: "Have you forgotten so soon? They're phasing out Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

[Cobalt Greywalker]

Of course the scene going through my head at the time for this idea involved A.C. interrupting one of the Professor's rants by essentially playing bongos with his tonsils, and while he was stunned Greenpeace flies up and pours a typical mug of Klatchian Coffee down his mouth whilst giggling and declaring "For Science!".

[Vangeek]

Oh my.
Oh deary deary me.
Idly, my char might be one of the people in fenspace who's had the brillaint idea to craft the stuff already, given her previous forays into fan experimentation.

[robkelk]

---

And the mind boggeling results of the Iron Inventor match.

---

Well, Skuld's invention is going to be "Mister Ice Cream Maker, Model II", which (unlike Model I) can create all the various flavours of Japanese ice cream. Not as useful as The Professor's invention, which I won't reveal now because it's also a plot-device. Mind you, there's at least one other techie in the Girls - Kaolla Su. Who's going to win?
So, yes, the scene's almost definitely going to be written.

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[robkelk]

---

Idly, my char might be one of the people in fenspace who's had the brillaint idea to craft the stuff already, given her previous forays into fan experimentation.

---

If you'd care to write the scene, I'll reference it in flashback.
(Yes, I know this means adding yet another line to the Acknowledgements List Of Doom...)

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Norgarth]

At this rate, the acknowledgements list is going to be a chapter in and of itself. __________________
666-HELL The phone number of the Beast
___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin

[robkelk]

Yeah, I know... so I'll probably post it as its own section.
(Which actually solves a problem I've been wrestling with... )

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Vangeek]

Write scene? Gooood.
Lemme know the paticulars, any details you want mentioned.

[robkelk]

All I really need mentioned is who created the coffee variant and why it's named after the Discworld brew. Other than that, feel free to take the scene in whatever direction you want ...

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Vangeek]

I'm not entirely sure how to write it, but I suppose I could go with herself thinking the stuff up and passing it out at a station somewhere, then have whoever needs to call later to order some. Any names I should include?

[Kokuten]

I would love to have a 'standard order' of three pounds of ground coffee a month.Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979

[Norgarth]

Why is it named after the Diskworld brew? Simple, because a diskworld fen created it. __________________
666-HELL The phone number of the Beast
___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin

[Cobalt Greywalker]

Koukuten, you're insane. Unless, of course, you're a traditionalist who gets thouroughly drunk before having the traditional thimble full to sober you up.
Vangeek, Greenpeace would like some cutttings, seedlings, or seeds so she can grow her own variety.

[Kokuten]

Cobalt, spend a weekend with me. Saturday morning, drag out of bed, assimilate coffee. The coffee starts brewing about ten PM the previous night, and is usually about right by ten AM saturday. I'm usually the first one up.
My weekend coffee has successfully been used as a degreaser, light duty lubricant, and brake cleaner. Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979

[Cobalt Greywalker]

Ah. I'd still have some alchohol around. Just in case like.
A.C. has a scotsman aboard (artificial though he is) and he's working on a good single malt.

[robkelk]

---

Any names I should include?

---

Like I said, "feel free to take the scene in whatever direction you want". Noah - or more accurately, Yoriko - will hear about it eventually, no matter which names you include...

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Vangeek]

Okay, I've got something worked out. Where is Greenpeace located, btw? I can, ah, run into someone at, say, a convienent station, or Phobos (that right?), or likewise.

[Cobalt Greywalker]

A.C.'s base is well out of the way, but the general closest base is Phobos yes. Greenpeace can arrange a meet easily enough, but if it isn't the lot of them, it's usually Andy travelling with her.

[Ebony]

---

A.C. has a scotsman aboard (artificial though he is) and he's working on a good single malt.

---

"Working on" as in "distilling," or "working on" as in "halfway through the keg, and should be finished by Thursday." With some folks, it can be difficult to tell. Ebony the Black Dragon
Senior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com

"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."

[Cobalt Greywalker]

---

"Working on" as in "distilling," or "working on" as in "halfway through the keg, and should be finished by Thursday." With some folks, it can be difficult to tell.

---

The former more than the later. Taste and smell are closely linked, so he wants something he can enjoy.

[Vangeek]

ALL righty then, I can work with this.
Mwhahahaha *ahem*
***
I groaned and rolled (literally) out of bed. My own fault I suppose for staying out late with the other Watch fen.
The Watch were good lads and lasses for the most part. They, like most fen, took their faction seriously. Late nights at the Broken Drum or some such were common, especially since some of them literally did hire themselves out as Watchmen, running security or working as private eyes. Nothing too rough, for the most part, but everyone likes to relax after a hard day of work.
But ye gods, the *hangovers*. I mean, I don't overindulge as habit, because the last thing anyone needs is a fen like me getting drunk and acting the ass. But when you've got a barkeep who's idea of a fun time is creatching Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters, REAL ones, out of a biomodded mixer...
I eyed the coffee maker from the floor. Well, espresso maker. It was a beat to hell thing I got from an old job once, but it did the trick. Hell, given the proclivity of some of Ptchika's crew's for caffeine, we even had fresh beans around usually. I vaulted myself up and dragged myself to the little machine, prepping the grounds and groaning as the delicious smell of coffee drifted through the cabin.
"There has got to be...got to be a better way of dealing with this. Espresso and raw eggs just don't cut it when dealing with Gargle blasters." I slurped down the black liquid when it was done. "Ye gods...hmm..."
Perhaps I should be a little more careful with my ideas. I've been given funny looks before when I ever so innocently ask for advice from KJ or Mal. This one was tamer then most. After all, what better way to cure a hangover resulting from a PG then biomodded coffee? And I wasn't thinking throwing some guacamole into the mix, no way.
I tapped my fingers, then tapped out a email. Finding plants, or seeds, might be tricking...heaven knew getting 'wavium wouldn't be a problem either. I hit enter and then waited for the shit to hit the fan.
***
"B..."
"Yiiiis?"
"What's that?" I glanced at Kat.
"It's a seedling."
"Of what?"
"Coffee tree. Beans. I'm not sure how it grows yet." I said cheerfully, packing, ah, fertilizer into the soil. Kat pinched the bridge of her nose and wandered off, muttering something about me being a crazy woman, and I continued to pack, very very carefully, a very small amount of 'wavium treated fertilizer into the pot. This was yet another project of mine, joining the two or three already in progress. I wasn't ready to open up shop yet, but I had wood treating for the cricket bat, and I still needed some special metal for my signature item...
***
I don't think Mal was...pleased with my shouts the next morning. I woke up in a tangle of plant life and coffee beans. Seems the three small pots I'd planted had mutated quickly, even overnight, and they were already blooming. Gorram handwavium...I plea bargained my way out, carefully sealed of the clippings, and kept a watchful eye on the now lush bean plants. My cabin was crowded, but we were making landfall in a couple days and, well, I'd see about either harvesting these bastards and properly processing the beans. No doubt someone would know how to.
***
Here we were, Phobos. I eyed the coffee plants. Sure enough, they'd already started sprouting beans, cheerful little green pods ready to pop off the vine. I don't know if it was the fact that I knew they'd been grown with 'wavium, or the fact that the Watch (my cheerful, loving bunch of fen) didn't know yet what I had done, but the plants were vaguely menacing to my eyes. I'm not a caffeine fiend, as previously stated, by some people out there...
I loaded the three plants, in their protective cases/ terrariums, onto a handy cart, or attempted to. I wanted to haul these things off the Ptchika, as per orders, and get them to a safe place where I could study them better and figure out a way to harvest and prep the beans properly. But yuck, the terrariums were *heavy*. I was half on and half off of the Ptchika's cargo bay ramp, struggling with the cases and praying I didn't spill them.
*Really* praying.
***
Okay, so I'm kinda planning on having the relevant person bump into me, or I can continue onwards. Feel free to jump in, Greenpeace. Or whoever. ^^

[Kokuten]

seventy-four tons of Battle Aluminum - the finest nonferrous building material, shielding, plate, track, well, ANYTHING metal that I've yet seen enter mass production in Fenspace.
And I had to boss it down to Phobos base, which, fortunately, had a big parking lot to drop it in. The load was a 8 wide, 5 tall stack of 20 foot beams of 1 foot square Battle Aluminum, with 4 pallets of tools and dies for working it on top, and it was the single biggest order I had yet recieved (that I'm willing to discuss in public).
And I didn't think I could handle it. I had choke rings around each end, and two of The Boys on each ring, running the whole show from V, with Millie doing overwatch and holding a working crew. The Boys had chivvied the load into Phobos wee little gravity well, and we were dropping slowly towards the edge of the big tarmac.
"Doc, Sleepy, bring your end up a tiny bit." I commanded, eyeing the awkward bundle nervously. We were approaching the bulk cargo pad quicker than I liked, and as the load came back even, I opened my mouth to tell all four boys to slow their rate of descent, and it happened.
Phobos gravity took over. We went from the weak attractive force that Phobos naturally puts out to the 'wave-powered Terran Standard G, and all four of my Boys plummeted out of sight.
"Abort, abort, get that load out of there NOW!" I screamed, followed by a blue streak after the mic was off, and the boys popped back into view, almost immediately.
I sighed in relief, and V cleared her throat.
"Uhm, boss.. "
"Yah?"
"Where's the load?"
I punched manual and pointed V's nose at Phobos, just in time to see the entire freaking bundle hit the tarmac and bounce twice. I swear to anything you care to name, and at most of them, that I saw the entire moon shake.
The bundle held, though, so I had at least one thing going for me, as we spiralled down towards the crewlock. Ptichka was sitting on the other side of the main lock, in the passenger parking area, and I hope noone had been paying attention.. Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979