Spamalot! Or yet more silly songs

[RMH999]

Since it's known that Doug's metatalent does work with Broadway tunes...
These are the only two that seemed like they might have a chance of triggering something... and I think they'd appeal to his sense of humor.
***********
Finland/Fisch Schlapping Dance
Finland, Finland, Finland, that's the country for me!
Finland is the country where we dance
Finland is the country where we play
Here in Finland boy and girl can find a true romance
in traditional Scandinavian way
Schlip schlap-
Schlip and schlap away
Schlip schlap-
Schlap away all day
Schlip schlap-
You simply can't go wrong
In traditional fish schlapping song
Finland Finland Finland
The country where I quite want to be
Pony trekking
Or camping
Or just watching TV
Finland Finland Finland
That's the country for me!
I said ENGLAND!
Oh, sorry.
***********
It's a somewhat schizophrenic little song, with two different themes, so it may not do anything.
However, it could be a way to teleport to Finland, or everyone within range immediately has placed in their hands one (1) fish and are possessed with the almighty urge to schlap someone with it.

The other song is the Run Away! song. Some slightly off-color language and derogatory terms for the French within.
*********

Fetchez la vache!

Run Away!
Run Away!
Run Away!
Run Away!
Run Away!
Run away Run away
Run away from the stench and the trenches
Run away Run away
From thse horrible nasty old Frenchies
These Frogs with their terrible prattle
Are fighting a battle with cattle!
We're all full of fear so let's get out of here
Run away! Run Away! Run Away!

You English all are bugger folk
Your mothers all are rugger folk
Your army is a bloody joke
You couldn't beat an artichoke.
If battle you choose to renew
We'll taunt you till you all turn blue
We turn our arses as you part
In your direction we all fart.
Fetchez Les Can-Can dancers!

Run Away! Run Away! Run Away!
Run, Run, Run, Run, Run, Run Away!
Run Away! Run Away! Run Away!
Run Away!
Run Away Run Away
It seems like a helpful solution
Run Away Run Away
To avoid this French revolution
We're stuck in a nasty position
Why don't you take a short intermission
Have a drink and a pee
We'll be back for Act Three
Two sir!
Twooooo
Run Away, Run Away, Run Away, Run Away, Run Away,
Run, Run, Run, Run, Run Away, Run Away!
************
This simplest version would cause one side to just break and run from a battle (with perhaps occasionally bombardments of cattle).
The more appropriate (and limitation) to me would be that the song would only be effective when you've got French and English on opposing sides, and the English are the ones that run.
I keep visualizing Jean from Rob Kelk's Nadia crossover standing up to taunt the Neo-Atlantians and the rest of the group watches in shock.
RMH

[Bob Schroeck]

I particularly like the latter. Especially the Nadia idea. If it makes any Frenchpeople in the area of effect more or less unbeatable he could take on the NeoAtlanteans entirely by himself.
BTW, there is an actual word for hitting someone with a fish: codswallop.

-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03

[robkelk]

Hmmmmm...
"You want me to what???"
"It's worth a try," I replied as I set my helmet to play Run Away!, one of the songs that trigered my talent that I had picked up on soundROM in Mega-Tokyo. "If it doesn't work, all we lose is a couple of seconds."
"And my dignity."
"Jean, 'dignity' is just a tragic disease that other people suffer from."

-Rob Kelk
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[Bob Schroeck]

Gee, that line sounds familiar...

-- Bob
---------
It's a "magical" land. I think "magical" is ancient Greek for "pain in the butt". -- Bun-Bun, Sluggy Freelance, 11/9/03

[robkelk]

I only steal from the best...
-Rob Kelk
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012