At the moment, I'm working on a Naruto fanfic (and posting it as I write it in Hawk's The Fanfiction Forum, and yes, the article is part of the forum's name). Genre-wise, it's what someone there called a "stealth crack-fic", in that the set-up makes the results pretty much inevitable, everything is logically developed, and the characters are fully fleshed out... but that doesn't make any of it any less absurd (to give you some idea here, at the current point of the story, Naruto is the recognised heir to Sailor Saturn and blushing whenever he looks at Hinata because of a four-hour "Talk" that involved an illustrated copy of the kama sutra, Sasuke is in the hospital after a prozac overdose caused him to activate the Deus Ex Machingan -- and no, I don't mean the Sharingan -- and Sakura is debating whether or not becoming Naruto's sex-slave would make up for how she treated him in the academy... but, then again, I haven't really started on her yet).
The problem is that I need a bit of help in the form of someone to bounce ideas off of and to help me go over and continuity-check and proofread the thing; a beta, basically. Anyone want to volunteer?-- This message brought to you by Ely Lilly, makers of SeraFem: Happy Pills for PMS.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfx8Nc6VKnI
The song is Timewarp from Rocky Horror, the clips are from Star Trek.__________________
666-HELL The phone number of the Beast
___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin

OOC: Mentioned this guy in passing in the 'Uranium Twinkie' thread, which blossomed wonderfully. Here's a writeup of him, will require a minor stalinization/retcon of the twinkie thread. Submitted for approval, open character.

Johnathan Mulder
Primary Writer: Open Character
Notable Mundane Attributes:
* I don't want to talk about it: Is aware of the X-Files. Is a closet fan of the X-files. Does not appreciate connection between last name and X-files.
* Here, sit down, let's talk: VERY good at his job, recruiter for BBI, official job title is "Human Resources Coordinator At Large (Detached)"
* I will use my Rabbit Style to defeat you!: Knows a smattering of a few martial arts, has no problem using them to distract/disarm/disable long enough to use his primary athletic talent
* Outta here!: Track and field all through high school, has kept in very good shape. Can sprint for surprisingly long, can 'wolf-lope' all day long if neccesary.
* Tank, I need an exit!: Carries (and keeps charged) a 'waved Satphone, will not hesitate to tap local, 'fen, BBI-local, BBI-fen, or authorities for assistance or rescue.
'Wavium Abilities:
* None: Not Biomodded
Quirks:
* Lightweight: Low alcohol tolerance, little to no experience with alcohol. Fairly stupid when drunk, ex "You're *hic* abshlutley GORGEOUS and vry nice person and got big tits, ma'am, but I'm looking for my Scully, and you're not- *passes out on aforementioned bosom*"
* Nice Kid: While he will fight in self-defence, Johnathon is a Nice Kid from Iowa, and he's not terribly comfortable with anything 'extreme' or 'alternative'. Not a bigot, just not comfortable - very low squick level.
* Corps is mother, Corps is father: An only child, both parents deceased (natural causes), one remaining uncle (Who is a moderately skilled clothier on The Island). Main emotional ties are to BBI-as-organization, and Buckaroo-as-father-figure.
* Personable: Is a genuinely Good person, committed to the goals of the BBI, and to helping those he's brought into the fold. Square Peg for the job's Square Hole.
* Can't keep ahold of it: Johnathon prefers to use a wired or wireless headset for his satphone, as he is on it quite often, but can't keep ahold of one. Cords will get snagged, wireless sets will fall off and get ran over, batteries in wireless sets will mysteriously melt. Noone knows.
Jonathon Mulder is a fourth generation American by way of French ancestors who fled from unknown troubles in Germany (pre-wwI) The family name was originally 'Muller', and was corrupted by the Ellis Island folks. No trace of his French or German ancestry remains, with his dirty-blonde hair, his nondescript hazel eyes, and his well-tanned, strong features, this guy is 100% cornfed Iowa America. Graduating from high school in 2005, John worked as an apprentice to the maintenance team for the local Union organization, and saw the difficulties of the men and women involved in that organization, how tough it was for them to find the 'perfect job', that allowed them to combine their vocation and their avocation.
When he saw an ad for the BBI in an out-of-state newspaper (that someone had used for packaging, for an X-Files DVD he ordered), he decided to give it a shot.
That was the beginning, and he hasn't looked back since. Johnathon currently maintains a permanent address on The Island - actually, his uncle's place, but there is a room for him. Most of his time is spent in hotels or 'roughing it', in the process of his dual job for the BBI.
The first part of this job is Recruiting - Johnathon finds likely candidates for the various branches or specific assignments of the BBI, and does his best to sign them up, usually by just pitching the job in his earnest, straightforward, no-nonsense manner that he learned growing up. Johnathon has developed The Knack for his job, and hardly ever pitches a job to someone that is unsuited or uninterested. His record has given him great leeway in 'fixing the deal', allowing him to customize offers to fit situations.
The second part of the job, and the one that takes up the lion's share of his time, is Support. Johnathon is one of the support agents for the BBI Man-in-the-field, able to provide on short notice or long term, lodging, food, transportation, medical support, or even evac.
Johnathon can be found striding through a marketplace in Cairo or a back alley in Berlin, riding in a cab in the Dullin tunnel in france or the main drag in Brooklyn, hiking through the Bush in Alaska or the river basin of the Zambize. Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979

Isoroku Takano, a Japanese pilot shot down over Bougainville Island in 1943, is thrown through a time slip and allowed to relive his life, retaining all the memories of his former existance. Teaming up in 1941 with another time-traveller, Yasuburo Otaka, he seizes power in the Japanese government. With Otaka as prime minister and Takano leading the armed forces, the Japanese demand that Western powers pull out of Asia. When the Americans refuse to comply, the Japanese declare war and bomb Pearl Harbor.
Foiling the evil American plans for the atom bomb, the Japanese push the enemy back to Christmas Island, using the foe's own weapon against them. As the fighting rolls down from the Torres Strait to the Tasman Sea, U.S. President Roosevelt has a heart attack and dies. Scared at the Japanese victories, Hitler declares war on his one-time allies. The Japanese navy blows up a Third Reich atomic facility on Madagascar, and, in a desperate attempt to curb Nazi advances, launches suicide attacks in the Red Sea. By 1946, a stalemate leads to espionage operations in California and Manchuria, and the Nazis launch a U-boat counterattack in the Indian Ocean.
Based on the long series of novels by Yoshio Aramaki, Deep Blue Fleet takes a very different approach toward the pacifist posturings more commonly seen in English-language anime. Ironically, this "alternate history" has more in common with genuine WARTIME ANIME, but it coyly extricates itself from the real issues of WWII. Mixing the second chances of EMBLEM TAKE 2 with the historical reenactment of ANIMENTARY, the series dispenses with the Allied enemy relatively quicklythere is just enough time to self-righteously shoo them out of the Pacific before more acceptable foes enter the fray. From that point on, the story is an excuse for a series of battles utilizing Axis weapons and vehicles that never left the drawing board. Compare to Ted Nomura's U.S. comic World War II: 1946, which places similar emphasis on "what-if" technology.
A one-shot special, Secret Launch of the Sorai (1997), features two engineer brothers working on a secret project, who see American planes in the air and launch ahead of schedule to thwart the 1942 Doolittle bombing raid on Tokyo. It is Deep Blue Fleet in a nutshella famous Japanese defeat turned into a victory. Though some may claim that the series' value lies in its painstaking research, the Doolittle raiders are flying B-30s instead of historically accurate B-25s.
After the initial 19 episodes, the series continued as Fleet of the Rising Sun (Kyokujitsu no Kantai), directed by Hiromichi Matano and backtracking a year to 1945 and the launch of Japan's latest battleship, the Yamato Takeru, which immedietly trounches Germany's Bismarck II. The flagship soons leads a fleet to Europe where, amid its spats with Hitler, it takes time out to shell Britain. As with earlier episodes, the result is an unnerving window on a very different world, one that holds the sick fascination of a traffic accident.
****
Oh, yeah, won't be seeing that fansubbed soon. But I'd really like to watch it in a train-wreck watching sort of way.

I just realized I hadn't posted this yet. Sorry about that.

As with the story, discussion elsewhere, please...

Legend of Galactic Girls: Concordance


References about Fenspace itself are not detailed here. Please consult the Fenspace Wiki for obscure details about the setting.

Knowledgable readers may have noticed the chapter naming convention I've used for this story: all of the titles are variations of anime titles. The overall
title, Legend of Galactic Girls, plays off of the old series
Legend of Galactic Heroes
.

Prologue

Sangnoir of the Universe

A play off of Stellvia of
the Universe, the translated full name of the anime Stellvia.

"Don't tell me you've heard of me?"

"We've heard of you."

"I asked you not to tell me that."

This is a variation of one of the stock exchanges from the 1960s-era spy spoof Get Smart.

"... when one of our universe's authors combined the concept with quantum mechanics' lack of a privileged frame of reference, he realized that
everyone is fictional in some other reality somewhere."

Specifically Robert A. Heinlein, in his novel The Number of the Beast. (Or, at least,
that's where I first saw the concept.)

Oh, wonderful - not again

See Drunkard's Walk X for the first instance of Doug learning he's a character in a
story.

the International Strike Teams

According to Bob's website, this is the
original name of the International Super Teams from GURPS I.S.T. (You learned it here first:
Noah's a gamer geek.) Noah's checking to make sure Doug really is Doug, and not some other cross-world traveler pretending to be The Loon -- or, worse
yet, the evil-reflection "Prateorian Doug", metahuman enforcer for his homeworld's Music And Film Industry Associations, that may or may not
exist somewhere out there.

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said, "Huh?"

"Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing."

- attributed to Robert Benchley

When I regained consciousness,

This is a recurring bit from Dave Broadfoot's stories of his character Sgt. Renfrew of the RCMP,
as told irregularly on the Royal Canadian Air Farce radio show in Canada in
the 1980s.

Mr. Broadfoot told the Renfrew stories as first-person-viewpoint tales. Often, but no more than once per story, "Renfrew" would recount doing
something unbelievably stupid and completely avoidable (like jumping out a window in order to land on his horse without checking that the horse was still
there, or reading a waitress' nametag and asking what the other one's called.) The very next line of the story always began "When I regained
consciousness, ..."

As for how Doug learned about Sgt. Renfrew, perhaps one of his quiet untold stops was in an analogue of 1980s Canada?

That's the sixty-four-thousand-dollar question

A pulp-culture reference that's become mainstream, The $64,000 Question was a television
quiz show in the 1950s.

I thought of Maggie for a moment, and smiled. "When I'm away, I write home every day."

"And the next line," added Noah.

"... And when I'm away, I'll write home every day,

And I'll send all my loving to you."

- From All My Loving, by The
Beatles, written by Lennon/McCartney, copyright 1963 Northern Songs.



-Rob Kelk




"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

If there is one game you play this year, for the love of all that is holy, play BioShock. The demo came out for X360 a night or two ago and it is HOLY SHIT awesome. Looking forward to the PC demo to see how it runs on my hardware.*********
Touched By His Noodly Appendage
www.venganza.org

For three hundred years vampires the Church of the Brotherhood and human beings have lived in peaceful co-existence but when a rogue vampire starts killing humans, a human cop and a vampire cop must team up before a war between the two races erupts.
***
www.perfect-creature.com/
***
A very, very cool piece of low-key alt-history: a 17th century alchemist discovered advanced genetic manipulation, creates plagues that decimates the human race and also inadvertently creates vampires. Start from there and go forth from there.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=I...ed&search=
*dies laughing*
-Griever
When tact is required, use brute force. When force is required, use greater force.
When the greatest force is required, use your head. Surprise is everything. - The Book of Cataclysm

Lullaby
Hush now baby don't you cry
Rest your wings my butterfly
Peace will come to you in time
And I will sing this lullaby
Know though I must leave my child
That I would stay here by your side
And if you wake before I'm gone
Remember this sweet lullaby
And oh, through darkness, don't you ever stop believing
With love alone, with love you will find your way
My love
The world has turned the day to dark
I leave this night with heavy heart
When I return to dry your eyes
I will sing this lullaby
Yes I will sing this lullaby

Josh Groban-Awake Album
My first thought is that of an area "go to sleep" effect for everyone around Doug. However, I wouldn't recommend playing this in the Potter step with Harry around. Especially on Hallows Eve. It just might bring back the ghost of Lilly Potter back.

Weeping
I knew a man who lived in fear.
It was huge, it was angry, it was drawing near.
Behind his house, a secret place
Was the shadow of the demon he could never face.
He built a wall of steel and flame
And men with guns, to keep it tame.
Then, standing back, he made it plain
That the nightmare would never ever rise again.
But the fear and the fire and the guns remained.
It doesn't matter now.
It's over anyhow.
He tells the world that it's sleeping.
But as the night came 'round
I heard it's lonely sound.
It wasn't roaring, it was weeping.
And then one day the neighbors came.
They were curious to know about the smoke and flame.
They stood around outside the wall,
But of course there was nothing to be heard at all.
"My friends," he said, "we've reached our goal.
The threat is under firm control.
As long as peace and order reign
I'll be damned if I can see a reason to explain,
Why the fear and the fire and the guns remain."
It doesn't matter now.
It's over anyhow.
He tells the world that it's sleeping.
But as the night came 'round
I heard it's lonely sound.
It wasn't roaring, it was weeping.

In normal use, I'd say demon containment/imprisonment, though the effects would only last as long as the song. In the Potter step, it might just detail every shenanigan the Fudge ministry had ever done.
The last one I don't have an idea on it.
In Her Eyes
She stares through my shadow
She sees something more
Believes there's a light in me
She is sure
And her truth makes me stronger
Does she realize
I awake every morning
With her strength by my side
I am not a hero
I am not an angel
I am just a man
A man who's trying to love her
Unlike any other
In her eyes, I am
This world keeps on spinning
Only she stills my heart
She's my inspiration
She's my northern star
I don't count my possessions
But all I call mine
I will give her completely
'Til the end of all time
I am not a hero
I am not an angel
I am just a man
A man who's trying to love her
Unlike any other
In her eyes, I am
In her eyes I see the sky
And all I'll ever need
In her eyes time passes by
And she is with me
I am not a hero
I am not an angel
I am just a man
A man who's trying to love her
Unlike any other
In her eyes, I am
In her eyes, I am

When I first heard this I thought it could be used in a Sailor Moon step- Mamoru and Usagi's relationship. But I think it could be used better in the OMB step. The song describes K1's relationship with Belldandy from his POV to a tee. What's interesting is that the refrain is sung with a staccato beat. If you change "angel" to "Angel", it might sound snarky.
__________________
Into terror!,  Into valour!
Charge ahead! No! Never turn
Yes, it's into the fire we fly
And the devil will burn!
- Scarlett Pimpernell

Last week's Inquirer "top whatever" list was The INQUIRER Top 12 Songs About Technology. Now, with a topic like that, there's bound to be something that might give Doug a power, right?
Well, maybe. Discounting the purposeful mondegreen, the songs with dangerous or nonsensical lyrics, and the Neil Young song, the list gets much shorter. Here's what I came up with for powers from the two that were left:
Are Friends Electric?, Gary Numan (lyrics) - disables any self-aware robot in the area of effect. (One that Noah would not have let Doug play while he was visiting Stellvia, even if it wasn't a power song...)
Digital Man, Rush (lyrics) - gives him a robot-like body with every sensor he can imagine and a force field, but also makes him even more impulsive than normal and easier to track.

-Rob Kelk
"Read Or Die: not so much a title as a way of life." - Justin Palmer, 6 June 2007
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012