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DEEP HURTING!!! (Belldandy and the MST3000 Crew) |
Posted by: Logan Darklighter - 10-04-2005, 08:02 PM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction
- Replies (10)
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Okay, Bob mentioned he wanted to see this, so I'm posting this here in order to not hijack the Kurumi thread further. ^_^ I had the following MSTie saved on my hard drive. I've checked and I can't find the original source. So it's just as well that I'm posting it, since you probably won't find it without going to the Wayback machine or something, and even then, it's chancy.
This MSTie was written by Mark Sachs.
====================
In the not-too-distant future...
[We open on the Satellite of Love. Mike is sitting there; before him is a pile of menus from take-out restaurants. He's dialing a phone but having little luck reaching anyone. Propped unobtrusively in one corner of the set is a mirror.]
[Enter Crow.]
CROW: So, Mike, how's the dinner plans?
MIKE: Not so good, Crow. Hardly any of the take-out places will deliver to geosynchronous orbit. And the ones that will are either closed or not taking dinner orders until 6:00 PM. I'm down to this
last one.
CROW: [craning his neck to read it] Hmm? I dunno if I'm up for Japanese. Oh well, I'll be in the load pan bay with Servo if you need me.
[Crow wanders off. Mike dials the number.]
PHONE: Hello, this is the Relief Goddess Office Technical Support Line.
MIKE: Huh? I'm sorry, I wanted Fujishima's Takeout --
PHONE: We will have one of our technical support representatives over to you right away to handle your request. [click]
MIKE: Uh... [stares at phone] Hello? Hello?
[Suddenly there is a whoosh and roar of brilliant special effects, and from the mirror emerges a startlingly beautiful, elaborately dressed brown-haired and big-eyed woman...]
BELLDANDY: Hello?
MIKE: Yaah! Who are you?
BELLDANDY: I am the Goddess Belldandy. You called for the Relief Goddess Office for help. Well, here I am.
MIKE: Goddess?
BELLDANDY: [bowing] At your service. My job is to assist people in dire need, such as yourself. I can grant you one wish.
MIKE: Is this one of those "Twilight Zone" situations where I wish for something and its most awful consequence comes down and destroys me?
BELLDANDY: Of course not! As a Goddess, I cannot lie or trick you.
MIKE: I can wish for anything?
BELLDANDY: Anything your heart desires.
MIKE: All right! Okay, here I go. I wish you would take this satellite back down to Ear --
[Enter Tom and Crow.]
TOM: Hey Mike, we plugged up that leak in the air intake with all of your old socks, but -- Say, who's the new girl?
BELLDANDY: [smiling] Hello!
MIKE: Uh, hi Tom, hi Crow, this is Belldandy. She's... er...
BELLDANDY: [brightly] A goddess.
CROW: You're a goddess?
BELLDANDY: Yes. I work for the Lord, in Technical Support.
TOM: Gee. What's the Lord really like?
BELLDANDY: He's just like Bill Gates.
CROW: Wow.
[Commercial Sign light flashes.]
CROW: Hey, we got commercial sign.
MIKE: Gates willing, we'll be right back.
[**** Commercial Break ****] -Logan
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"Because Science DEMANDS it!!"
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Killer clowns |
Posted by: TheTwisted1 - 10-02-2005, 09:40 PM - Forum: The Game Everyone Loves To Play
- Replies (1)
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Don't sing me lullabies
I won't close my eyes,
I can't close my eyes
It's true,
I'm doomed
'til dawn
shines through
Got too many things to do
Got friends to see,
I can't miss a thing
It's true,
I'm through
I'm screwed,
unglued
I won't close my eyes, I can't close my eyes,
I never close my eyes
You see, they're always there with funny hair,
Oh, I'm so scared
It happens to me every night
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
They always want to take a bite
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
And if you think this isn't real
I'll show you wounds that never heal
To them I'm just a happy meal
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
Make the coffee black as night
Help me through the night
I know their appetite for me
I'm meat
but I'm sweet
as can be
And if I do too much booze
I begin to snooze
I hear the big old floppy shoes
It's true,
I'm stew,
unchewed
I won't close my eyes, I can't close my eyes,
I never close my eyes
See, they're always there with that funny hair,
Oh, I'm so scared
It happens to me every night
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
They always want to take a bite
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
And if you think this isn't real
I'll show you wounds that never heal
To them I'm just a happy meal
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
It happens to me every night
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
They always want to take a bite
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
And if you think this isn't real
I'll show you wounds that never heal
To them I'm just a happy meal
Can't sleep, the clowns will eat me
--Alice Cooper, "Can't Sleep, the Clowns Will Eat Me"
Summons killer cannibal clowns? With a preference to attacking the sleeping? A song not to play.
-The Twisted One
Oh good, my dog's found a chainsaw
--Lilo, "Lilo and Stitch"
"If you
wish to converse with me, define your
terms."
--Voltaire
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I had the strangest idea last night |
Posted by: Valles - 10-02-2005, 06:54 AM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction
- Replies (8)
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Picture this: Kaname Chidori is the pampered daughter of a wealthy, powerful official in the world government. She attends one of the best private schools in the world, and is the center of the glittering galaxy of its social scene.
Then, one night, as she's out walking along the beach, she sees an advanced military prototype fall from the sky and crash into the sea offshore. The pilot washes up as she watches, badly injured, and she spreads her jacket over him (trying to ignore the firmness of his body and the distinctive small, cross-shaped scar on his cheek) and runs to get help... but when she gets back, he's gone.
Fast forward to a few days later - Kaname is passing out invitations to her upcoming birthday party, and goes to give one to a newly arrived transfer student... before discovering, to her shock, that he has a very familiar scar.
He tears the envelope in half and drops the pieces to the floor, then murmurs in her ear as he brushes past:
"I will kill you."
Stay tuned, folks, for the next episode of
GUNDAM ARBALEST
...
^_^
Ja, -n
===========
===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."
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Words that aren't used enough |
Posted by: classicdrogn - 09-27-2005, 01:42 AM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction
- Replies (22)
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Poltroon - a craven coward, yellow-belly
- CD had several, but forgot the others while driving
That which does not kill us... has made its last mistake.
SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
" It's crazy to try to spell out all the mega-nooks and hyper-crannies of a Borg contrivance." - Doug Drexler
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows
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Definition of Science Fiction? |
Posted by: hmelton - 09-26-2005, 05:54 PM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction
- Replies (15)
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I just did a search at Books a million for Science Fiction and the first 30 entries were "Harry Potter" related.
I don't see how anyone could mistake a witchcraft fantasy like "Harry Potter" for Science Fiction.
I could see it showing up eventually in the search, but putting it ahead of such writers as Isaac Asimov or Jules Verne is either stupidity or more likely greed.
It did make me curious.
What one story or writer best matches your Definition of Science Fiction?
Science Fiction
For me Jules Vernes stories meet the Classic definition of true Science Fiction.
His "20,000 Leagues under the sea" being one of the better examples.
For me Mary Shelleys "Frankenstien" is a good example of more Fantasy focused Science Fiction.
What are your choices?
howard melton
God Bless
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Religious Wars of the Future |
Posted by: M Fnord - 09-21-2005, 10:52 PM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction
- Replies (4)
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This is something I wrote up a long time ago for the Orion's Arm SF worldbuilding/gaming/wannabe media franchise setting, just to see if I could pull it off. In the end it was rejected, but it's too good a bit not to share....
From the Encyclopedia Galactica, Revised 351st Edition, 10258 a.t. (12,227 AD):
Trekkist-Jedi Cladewar
Feud between Star Trek and Star Wars lifestyles, lasting since the Atomic Age.
The Trekkist-Jedi conflict extends back to the late Atomic Age, when the film Star Wars was released. The Star Wars meme, ostensibly "science fiction" though really owing more in construction to the works of Atomic Age fabulists JRR Tolkien and Joseph Campbell, took root quickly and firmly in the minds of the baseline youth at the time. This put it into direct conflict with the older and more established Star Trek meme, which also had a resurgence with feature films released at roughly the same time.
By the early Interplanetary Age both Star Trek and Star Wars had developed large masses of devoted followers, and the conversion from simple fandom to religion/philosophy was proceeding apace. The Trekkist Church had by this time been founded, and the Star Wars groups were in the process of coalescing into the Jedi clade.
Both groups invested heavily in interplanetary colonization, building habitats and planetary colonies whenever possible. At this point, the rivalry between the two groups consisted mainly of spoof attacks on "enemy" computer networks, nasty insults, and forcible conversion of nonaligned rivals (see Scientology, Church of).
During the Nanoswarms in Sol System, the rivalry became an open conflict between the two groups. Black-market weapons and specially-designed "superweapons" were employed by the Trekkists and the Jedi, each determined that the other would not survive the swarms. Eventually, though, the swarms forced the combatants back behind their blue goo defenses.
An informal truce was called in the pre-Federation era, as both groups recognized a need to aid in the reconstruction of Sol System. The groups were also bolstered by the Expulsion; as billions of humans were thrown off Earth by GAIA, many were welcomed into the Trekkist and Jedi ranks. When the Federation was founded at Roddenberry Habitat, the Jedi percieved that any chance they had at gaining supremacy would not succeed, and decided to find their fortunes in interstellar space. The hardliners of the Trekkists also decided to leave the workings of the Federation to the willing-to-compromise moderates, and followed the Jedi into space.
Both groups founded planets near the edge of the Inner Sphere; the Trekkist cladehome of Vulcan, and the Jedi cladehome of Coruscant. From there the clades built up numbers and expanded further into the perhiphery, exploring and colonizing a number of systems. The rivalry was mostly forgotten during the Federation Age due to the general lack of timely communications between the two clades. However, the ancient feud became part of both Trekkist and Jedi mythology, especially the brief war during the Nanoswarms. It is believed that the dissapearance of several Trekkist ships rimwards of Pacifica is due to an encounter with Jedi warships, but this has not been verified.
The invention of wormholes and the beginings of the modern Nexus brought the clades back into full contact with each other in 4537. The reconnection brought back attempts at network attacks, but by the end of the 46th Century the "war" had dropped to a steady-state of insults and debates over religious minutae. This steady-state was to remain the status quo between the Trekkists and the Jedi until the Version War.
The war between the clades flashed hot during the chaos of the Version War, when a Trekkist armada made an assault on Coruscant, causing massive damage to the world-city and killing billions. The Jedi retaliation sparked a number of smaller conflicts as anti-Trekkist factions took the opportunity to strike at their enemies, and the war was engaged. Aside from the initial blows, once the wormholes were closed casualties were fairly light, consisting primarily of the crews of the warships. Still, the Trekkist-Jedi War was one of the last of the Version War conflicts to be ended, finally coming to a halt with a Negentropist-mediated settlement at Roddenberry Habitat some 150 after the Version War itself had ended.
Since the War and the reestablishment of the Nexus, the clades have returned to their steady-state of mutual dislike. As a sop to relativistic crews who are returning to the cladehomes from the war era, special virch environments have been constructed to simulate a continuing war between Trekkist and Jedi using "proper religious physics" (i.e. the nonstandard physics of the original fictions). These virches have, against all odds, become slightly popular in the Nexus, and are considered cult classics.---
Mr. Fnord, interdimensional man of mystery.
http://www.jihad.net/
Mr. Fnord interdimensional man of mystery
FenWiki - Your One-Stop Shop for Fenspace Information
"I. Drink. Your. NERDRAGE!"
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