(From this thread, if you've been skipping it)
TXY01.txt
20050722 - started discussion on the DWMB
20050724 - created story file
20050727 - final edit, having squashed the gremlins and broken up the run-ons.
Such little things can make the largest changes - one person being assigned a duty instead of another, equally qualified collegue, a trip taking eighteen days instead of nineteen, reflexes just a hair quicker than they might otherwise be... People who might never have met can fall in love. People who might never have existed can be born. Stories that might never have been imagined can be told.
So it was when the Village Hidden by Mist sent a courier to the Village Hidden by Leaves, and so she arrived just as a Stone assault force attacked, and so she was saved by a young Leaf jounin, and so - after a time - they had a healthy, energetic baby girl.
*Very* energetic. She took strongly after her father, with the perhaps fortunate exception of her face.
Of course, even when the major changes seem to have exhausted themselves, the smaller ones keep adding up, a minor difference of timing here, a small change in attitude there... And suddenly, there's a new round of huge differences from the way things would otherwise have been.
Pull up a chair, and get ready to work on your screentan. It's time to tell a story.

Bewilderbeast Studios Presents
TEAM EXPLOSIVE YOUTH! HASSHIN!!
A work of Naruto fan fiction
by
ClassicDrogn
with conceptual assistance (and lots of prodding) from
Nathan Baxter
Greiver
ordnance11
Drakensis

Dedicated to the above, ah, *enthusiasts*, who took a random plotbunny and fed it until it demanded release. Remember, this is YOUR fault I'm doing this, guys.

Sarutobi Chieshamaru, Third Hokage of the Leaf, smiled warmly even as he adjusted his aging frame on the seat behind the desk where he was giving out the day's mission assignments. It had been a very good week, he reflected: Two days ago one of his personal projects, a child who'd become like a second grandson to him, had graduated from the ninja academy. Even though it had taken an extra year for the boy to pass, he'd entered two years younger than the average, and was still ahead of his age group.
Yesterday, after no more than the usual false starts, the team Sandaime had carefully chosen to include the freind who'd been such a good influence to the boy and a jounin sensei who wouldn't hold the past against him had passed that sensei's team exam.
Today... Today, he would get to assign the first mission of a fine young ninja who might someday use this seat himself. Sarutobi handed over the last of the ANBU assignment folders for the day, and signalled that the general mission assignments could begin. If he knew his subordinates as well as he thought he did...
Ah, there they were, the first as he'd expected. He gave a quick handsign to his assistants that all was well as a smoke bomb went off at the front of the room, the sudden burst of air making his red trimmed robes flutter gently.
With an impassioned cry, a green-clad shape hurtled out of the smoke to land dramatically posed, one arm extended in a thumbs-up. "The Leaf's Handsome Green Beast, Maito Gai!" the intruder shouted, light from the morning sun outside the window gleaming from a wide, toothy grin.
A second form followed after him, like a 2/3 scale clone save for lacking a jounin's vest or moustache, and differently shaped eyes, right down to the skin tight green jumpsuit and gleaming black bowl cut. He took a mirroring pose a few feet away before announcing in a youthful voice, "The Leaf's Proud Green Beast, Rock Lee!"
Another hurtling form, flashing green and orange as it somersaulted to a stop, blonde hair and foxy grin above the boy's trademark orange jacket, worn over yet another of the green spandex jumpsuits. "The Leaf's Blazing Orange Wildfire, Uzumaki Naruto!" he shouted enthusiastically, both arms up to wave victory signs. Somehow, the jacket managed to clash with the slightly different shade of orange on the leggings all three wore, the Hokage noted to himself. If nothing else, hiding that outfit under the robes of office would probably be counted a heroic service to the village.
Before his thoughts could get too off track - an old man's vice, and one he found himself indulging in more often as time went on - the third and final genin team mate made her entrance, cartwheeling skillfully to a perfect stop, one arm draped around Naruto's shoulders, the opposite leg around his knee, and her other arm holding out another victory sign, proclaiming herself "The Leaf's Beautiful Fuschia Tsunami, Maito Rikou!" The short red skirt around her waist rustled to a stop, a hot pink spandex body glove molding her somewhat limited assets to best effect against Naruto's shoulder as the tall, lithe girl snuggled closer. Thankfully, she'd been spared the bowl cut and fuzzy brows of her father and his look-alike team mate; long, dark hair instead pinned up in a bun on the back of her head. In obviously practiced unison, all four concluded, "Team Explosive Youth is ready for action!"
Sarutobi stifled a chuckle as the eleven-year old boy looked uncertainly at the kunoichi for a moment before shrugging it - and her - off. "Hey, hey, old man! How about our dramatic entrance! Wasn't that cool?" Naruto crowed.
The chuckle was still fighting to get out, damn it. And Gai's passionate admonishments about not letting the exuberance of the springtime of youth overwhelm one's sense of respect wasn't helping him one bit.

---=- + -=---

Sometime later, the four of them were picking up trash in one of the village's many small park areas. It had pleasantly soft grass and a light screen of trees around the central clearing to provide shade and a windbreak - and a bit of cover if the area was needed for its secondary purpose as a rallying point for defenders. At the moment, it also it also rang with the loudly complaining voice of a certain orange-clad genin.
"JEEEEZE," Naruto whined. "Why do we have to do such a boring, low class mission!? A super excellent ninja like me should be escorting a daimyo, or rescuing a run-away princess, or- or catching a hated criminal, or --"
His indignant tirade was cut off as Gai catapulted out of his handstand, the crushed juice can he'd been carrying to the trash bin clutched between his ankles flying up in the air. Seconds later, it landed to balance perfectly on the tip of the finger he'd raised toward the heavens while declaiming, "Ah, my impetuous student! It is as our most skilled and wise Hokage explained, these simple tasks serve the village in THREE WAYS! Firstly, by performing in small ways for a modest fee, it provides a steady flow of money! Secondly, by giving such missions to new graduates like yourselves, it frees more experienced ninja for more dangerous endeavours! Finally, it simultaneously allows the opportunity to FAN THE FIRE of your youthful energy, to hone teamwork and skills to someday join those more experienced ranks yourselves!"
The juice can became airborne again as the jounin waved particularly emphatically, sailing smoothly into the bin without touching the rim. His own armload of trash just deposited, Lee clutched his hands in front of his chest, eyes wide in admiration. "Oh Gai-sensei, you're so knowledgeable!" he gasped.
"Indeed," the super-fuzzy browed jounin aknowledged, "BUT! There is one MORE way in which such simple missions are useful!" Lowering his voice (to merely "loud") Gai beckoned his new-minted team into a huddle. Placing a hand each on the shoulders of Lee and Rikou, and winking conspiratorially at Naruto across the circle, he asked, "Do all of you remember my most secret and powerful ninja technique?"
"Un, un!" Rikou replied, while the boys were still opening their mouths. "The secret Maito 'Self-Rules' training, right?"
"CORRECT, MY BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER!" the emotive jounin bellowed, pulling her into a fierce hug. "You shine so BRILLIANTLY in your springtime of youth!" Recovering himself, with effort, he set the girl back on her feet and returned to the huddle. "Yes, the fearsome 'Self-Rules' training! All ninja know that to gain strength requires work, but with the 'Self-Rules' training you go BEYOND the minimum to work EXTRA hard and become EXTRA STRONG! By imposing your own obstacle, you overcome ALL LIMITS with the EXPLOSIVE POWER OF YOUTH!" Fires blazed in the tall jounin's eyes and sunlight shone from alabaster teeth as he exhorted, "I shall help you begin! Together we have cleaned this clearing, but now, each of you shall pick up one side of the tree line walking ONLY ON YOUR HANDS!" He struck anther pose, a fist clenched in in the middle of the circle.
"YEAH!" Lee shouted. "And if I can't do that, I'll pick up the ENTIRE next park without using my hands at all!" he promised, knocking his own fist againts his sensei's.
"And, and, if *I* can't do that, I'll toss every piece of trash in the next park in the air and burn it right away with Katon no Jutsu!" Naruto exclaimed, thumping his fist into the pile.
"Well if *I* can't do that, I'll clean an entire park by catching each piece of trash with my ribbon daggers!" Rikou enthused, completing the circle. "It's a promise!"
Overcome with pride, Gai swept his team into a group embrace. "OH, MY STUDENTS!" he cried. "IT MAKES ME SO PROUD TO SEE THE FIREY DETERMINATION OF YOUR BRILLIANT YOUTHFUL SPIRITS! Surely you will become the GREATEST of ninja!"
"OH, GAI-SENSEI!" Lee hollered.
"YOU'RE SO INSPIRATIONAL, TOUSAN!" Rikou agreed.
Naruto, while he'd gotten over being alarmed at the jumpsuit-wearing jounin's demonstrative nature, still had years of ingrained reflex that touching equalled having been grabbed or slapped, and went stiff... but only for an instant. After all, this was his freind Lee who'd trained with him this past year until they both could graduate, and Gai-sensei who'd helped them both with taijutsu even before he was their official sensei and taught Naruto the Katon technique that he'd been practising with, and Gai's daughter Rikou who seemed to be all over him lately anyway and had also trained with them regularly after following her father to their practise area one afternoon. The blond boy relaxed into the hug as if into a perfectly warmed bath, smiling from one whisker-marked cheek to the other, his voice unchacteristically soft as he stated, "Yeah, I'll be the greatest Hokage ever, and you guys'll be my number one ninja for sure."
Restraining his overflowing heart, Gai released the genin and stepped back. "YOSH!" he shouted, pumping a fist. "TEAM EXPLOSIVE YOUTH, HASSHIN! I shall clear the south border!" So saying, he did a series of backflips, ending once again in a handstand, feet spearing down to grip a discarded take-out box between them. The rest of his team - listed in the Hokage's records as Team Six from this year, though Gai had never called them that even in his own thoughts - followed suit, if less acrobatically, and with considerably more difficulty in keeping their balance and their smelly cargo at the same time. Rikou also had to adjust the coil of thin, black silk rope she kept on one shoulder to keep it from falling off, tucking the free end under her sash-style Konoha badge.

---=- + -=---

(Would you like to know more? ch2 draft is post #5 on page 2)
===========================
The Naruto setting and all characters therein are the property of Kishimoto-sensei and Shonen Jump. Maito Rikou and the circumstances leading to her presence are pretty much a collaborative effort between myself and my co-conspirators, but may be freely used as long as we're aknowledged for her.
hasshin - launch, take off, get going
Chieshamaru - So far as I know, Sarutobi-sama has not been given a personal name in either the manga or anime. I added the common Naruto-world suffix -maru to 'chiesha,' or 'wise man.'
Katon no Jutsu - that's right, just Katon, no further technique name. The basic fire-type jutsu from which the Uchihas created their family specialty techniques. It is commonly known in the Leaf and requires only a single seal, which can even be done one-handed with practise. Jiraya used it to ignite Gamabunta's oil while fighting Orochimaru and the snake boss, Manda.
Sash-style badge - it would be a forehead protector, but it's on a longer strip of fabric worn around the waist. Gai and Lee use them in canon, so does Rikou here, but Naruto still uses a dark blue hitae-ate badge and ACTUALLY wears it on his forehead. I would have kept his goggles and given him a sash-type badge as well, but his jacket would cover it most of the time. He uses a front-tied plain red sash and hangs the usual belt pouches off of that.

END OF LINEWhat, you think Samuel L. Jackson isn't going to survive the zombie apocalypse?
SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

Rosa's Coronas by Kate Campbell, found on her Rosaryville album--about a Cuban cigar roller.
"And I wonder as I roll, where will each one go?
Will they land in the hands of kings and presidents?
It's an art, it's a skill...some would even kill
for one of Rosa's Coronas."
Effects: Produces one top-quality hand-rolled Cuban cigar. How useful that might be, I dunno.
SKJAM!
"Part of me believes that mansion stood for something more than hate"--"Look Away", same album

Clout - Save me
Save me
take me away to the moonlight
the people around me don't feel right
what are we doing here.
Come on and save me let's get away from the action
you are the only attraction
take me away from here.
The party's on and one by one
the cars arrive and the people come
and I wonder if there will be anybody here alone.
another boring guy tries to catch my eye
should I smile or should I sigh
then you walked through the door and I saw
that you were all on your own.
Save me
take me away to the moonlight
...
We supped away without a single word
no one saw and no one heard
'cos we both agreed that I just wasn't worth it to stay
I went cold and hot should I go or not
you grabbed my hand and I couldn't stop
and I laughed and you smiled as we left and drove away.
Save me
take me away to the moonlight
...
Starlit sky moon on high
sure feels good to me
in my bones I've always known
this is how it's meant to be -
Save me
take me away to the moonlight
...
this was just another night
but now you hold me tight
and everything's alright
tonight
tonight is our night.
Might be a possibility to just walk away from a fight unmolested.
It may require walking in pairs, though ...
-- Cal

My laptop is still unresponsive, and I'm hoping I might have posted or emailed or something one of the fragmentary projects I had underway - it was a Naruto-fic, called "These Crazy Dreams" set during the gap in the manga, with the members of Team Seven sharing strange dreams about a mission to get mochi from the rabbit in the moon. I KNOW i sent a copy SOMEWHERE, but I already checked here and my mailing list... If anyone knows or can send a copy back to me, that would be great. It would need to go to merrynh at adelphia org instead of my usual worldconquer.org email, because the laptop is the computer that connects to that account, too.
- CD
What, you think Samuel L. Jackson isn't going to survive the zombie apocalypse?

SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

Quote:

---

"Up from the depths
Thirty stories high
Breathing fire
His head in the sky
GODZILLA!
GODZILLA!
GODZILLA!"

---

Because my mind seems to be working overtime whenever it's supposed to take in excessive amounts of information in a short period of time.
Remember a Ranmafic author by the nick of Dark Phoenix? He's on Florestica, or rather, his stories are. He hasn't really posted anything in a while, as far as I know. Anyway, one of his stories - a Ranmafic called 'Can it get any Worse?' has Ranma get adopted by demons and learn magic from them, because he's got a weird demonic aura thing going on (there's an explanation later on, irrelevant right now).
I was wondering what would happen if one were to apply the same plotbunny to Harry Potter. A sardonic, sociopathic and utterly egoistic Boy-Who-Lived is an amusing thought, especially since we could always attribute 'demonic/evil aura' to the curse scar ... Just a weird thought.
It's something I'd like to read almost as much as I'd have liked 'The Boy Who Laughed', which would have had Harrykins raised by none other than the Laughing Magician. The Conman. Y'know. John-boy.
Feel free to ignore the ramblings, they're mostly a bleedover from exam stress and a healthy dose of 'bleah' that came about due to the numerous HBP discussions going on right now.
-Griever
studystudystudystudystudy
When tact is required, use brute force. When force is required, use greater force.
When the greatest force is required, use your head. Surprise is everything. - The Book of Cataclysm

I tried to reread the earlier Potter books, preparatory to the new one, and discovered - or rediscovered, since it's been long enoguh to have forgotten the first time through - that I really can't stand them. This is probably why I generally only like the more varient HP fanfic, but it does present a problem when a pure-potterverse dragonbunnny starts stalking around and breathing fire in my head. Herein, therefore, I have exorcised sadi dragonbunny, and present it to the forum at large.
I have seen any number of new character fics, even more completely-break-an-existing-character-so-it's-nothing-more-than-the-same-name fics, and even a few SI-as-Harry fics. This one, though, would be either a break-Draco-so-he's-not-a-jerk fic or an insert-as-Draco fic, that latter of which I have not seen, and the first not done well.
Further, Ron pretty much has to come off as an ass for this to work, and the twins too for the first book's worth, thoguh they (being just a smidgen more reasonable) could well be brought into alignment with the hero cast later on - at the latest, after rescuing Ginny from the Chamber of Secrets, thoguh with much joking about how they never thought they'd see the day there was a tolerable Malfoy.
Anyway, on to the bunny. I called the text file "Draco Veritas," thoguh it's also a 'chapter' title.
- CD

-------- 8< -------- cut here -------- 8< --------

Draco Dormiens
The dragon asleep

It seemed, at first, a very odd sort of dream; moving and speaking without truly willing it - the regal blond man who acted as his father, taking him on a whirling trip through the fireplace to an afternoon's shopping in a fantastic market district, the odd books and equipment and supplies they purchased before parting ways while he stood to be fitted for the archiac robes worn by man, woman, and child alike. The focus sharpened, breifly, when he met another boy, dark haired and scrawny, while waiting there in the clothiers.
(blah blah blah) The other boy adjusted hhis thick-rimmed black glasses, and the dreamer noticed a lightning bolt shaped scar on this Harry's forehead. An electric tingle of shock ran through his body at the sight, even throguh the cloudy dream-feeling. (Blah! blah blah blah! Blah blah.)
He left the emerald-eyed boy in the shop, then, floating more deeply into dream as his dream-self and dream-father returned to their luxurious home, and through a week or two of idle time mixed with early studies of the books and things that had been bought, his father enforcing scholarship with dire warnings of what would befalll if he disgraced the family name with mere adequacy.
(&stuff)

Draco Lucidas
The dragon awakens

(on train to HW, confused identity, but not being a jerk and so befreinding Harry, while Ron just looks like an ass)

Draco Veritas
The dragon in truth
(sorting, the Hat doesn't know what to make of him, tells him he'll have to decide just who he is before he can be placed - he decides not to return to his sleep - oh, how tempting, but no - and is put in Slytherin anyway, "The proper place for a wyrm, after all, and for that matter a better fit now than for a dreamer, however dark the dreams, is -- SLYTHERIN!"
Harry, too, enters the House of the Snake.

Chapter titles to look up - Draco ("freinds" or "allies", bondong with Harry and through some plot device - Harry is concerned, Draco follows? About the same as canon with Ron if so - saving Hermione, who is then put upon by the Gryffindors as a Snake-Lover. No, Harry gets his own chapter, Draco Fraternas, The Dragon's Brother, Nee gets her own chapter with the Ally or Freind title), ("returns" or "familias" - home for the holidays, then fleeing back to the school in time for the Stone adventure), Draco ("homeless" or "wandering" - after escaping being returned to 'sleep', since the school year finshes out essentially as an epilogue, and he now must find somewhere to go for the summer.)
Scene: in "allies" chapter - The Gryffindors were hissing again as Hermione approiached their table in the Great Hall, face set in determination. They'd been treating her awefully for days, but she told herself she'd dealt with being unpopular in the muggle schools, she could handle it here, right? Most of the seats were full, as she'd been delayed recasting the protection and locking charms on her trunk. She didn't much want to sit by that rotten Weasley boy, but if she was quick he'd probably be too busy stuffing his face...
Not too busy to see her coming, apparently, and hold the chair against the table when she reached out for it. "This seat's taken, Hisskiss," he sneered, continuing, "That one's taken too," when she went for the one on the other side of the table - though she wanted to sitt by the holy terrors he called brothers even less. "Right, Fred, George?" "Yep, no room here -" "- for snake-lovers." the twins replied, in their usual oh-but-it's-all-in-good-fun tones. Expression setting even more stiffly, she looked around at the table, but those Gryffindors who didn't look the other way either looked like they were enjoying her discomfort. Neville gave her a sorrowful shrug, but quickly shifted his eyes to the Twin Terrors before deliberately going back to dealing with his food. She couldn' blame him, the one time he'd tried to stand up for her all his clothes had been a glowing, venomous green the next morning.
(She blows her top and bitches out the Griffs and casts something that makes the dishes spill on everyone, then flounces over to the seat beside Harry at the Slytherin table - some token protests about muggleborns, but Draco shuts them up by saying "Purity is measured in power, not the other way around. Besides, anyone who coats the entire Gryffindor table in pumpkin juice and kidney pudding must be alright.")

Important foreward-looking plot points: The reason he was spelled to sleeping must be addressed - probably at winter break, when he returns home and daddy dear realizes that something has gone wrong. Also, for Chamber of Secrets, both boys go through and meet the basilisk, Draco recieving a famous Slytherin's daggers (but not Salazar's) Forked Tongue and Swift Fang, one enchanted to give the owner understanding of all languages ("all" including parseltongue, noncoincidentally giving Harry and he a secure means of discussion as long as Voldie isn't in listening range), the other preventing petrification, poison, and similar (negative status condition, in RPG speak) effects. He gets one of the basilisk's eyes, but immunity to poison doesn't do anything for getting big chunks of flesh torn out of you by the fangs involved, and Harry has to finish the fight as in canon.
Dumbledore is likely to be even less forthcoming with a slytherin Harry, and Sirius would surely also react differently. Some kind of plotting to get some revenge on the Dursleys is also in order, whether on encouraged-to-be-sneaky Harry's part or Draco's. In any case, awake-Draco is just that, and understands the concepts of planning, subtlety, and stealth quite well, thanks.
What, you think Samuel L. Jackson isn't going to survive the zombie apocalypse?
SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows

Okay, so Star Wars isn't anime. Sue me. But this little Flash-animated MV is only 3.2MB, and well worth the bandwidth to check out at least once:
www.murdoch-watch.com/star_wars/
Besides, I'm a sucker for that song. Wonder what Doug could do with it...
Just watch out for that guitar solo. And that guy singin' the blues? Oy...

www.amv-contest-lists.org...ca2005.htm
Finalists and winners from the AX 2005 AMV contest. So far, I've only downloaded "The Wizard of Ozaka" and the "1985" video, both based (obviously) on AD, but they're both really good. TWoO is kinda quircky, using *very* well-edited inserts from other series to look like they were all actually animated together, and with a 8bit-RPG overlay. 1985 is... well... Yukari *is* a child of "The ME Decade," after all....

Everyone in range shrinks to be three to four feet tall and gains a suit of archaic armor - but to compensate, they are provided with a giant warhamster to ride.
Why? 'Cause they're all part of the Gnomish Space Marines. Also, any non-enchanted gadget they may have will break about half the time tey try to use it, and explode in the breaking one time in four.

Perhaps you prefer martial artist chickens? Try the Ray Stevens song linked from this page.

Or, maybe you're in a situation that's on the fishy side?

Bah. I still can't rmemeber the song I actually linked to the board to post about, jammit.

- CD
What, you think Samuel L. Jackson isn't going to survive the zombie apocalypse?

SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows