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Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 02:55 PM
My mother is not doing well at all.
She's been told that her congestive heart failure won't get better and that she can have 2 more years dealing with the stresses, both on herself and her family, of dialysis... or die on her own terms in about 2 weeks.
She's chosen the latter. Her transplant doctor/nephrologist basically told her that her passing is likely to be one of the gentler ways to go. But she's still going, and I'm going to miss her terribly.
And... one of her favorite covers:
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 03:02 PM
Aw, crap.... All I can offer is sympathy. No words of wisdom. Damn it.
-----
"The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this was some killer weed."
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 03:43 PM
Ah, jeeze, that sucks to hear. But speaking as one who watched his mother linger as dementia slowly took her, there is no small virtue in her choice, as hard as it must have been.
-- Bob
I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh, Clark Kent, Mary Sue, DJ Croft, Skysaber. I have been
called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the sun grows dim and cold....
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 03:56 PM
That sucks, and I wish you didn't have to go through it.
-Now available with copious trivia!
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 04:23 PM
My sympathies, FB. Everything else I want to say sounds trite when I read it back off the screen, so I'll leave it at that.
--
noli esse culus
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 05:47 PM
For what little comfort this might give: Your mother is fortunate in that she will be ending her life on her own terms in her own way - very few people get that option.
And, yes, you're going to miss her terribly... and you will continue missing her for as long as you remember her. Trust me on this one. And remember her.
--
Rob Kelk
Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 06:13 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-23-2019, 06:13 PM by Dartz.)
My sympathies.
I love the smell of rotaries in the morning. You know one time, I got to work early, before the rush hour. I walked through the empty carpark, I didn't see one bloody Prius or Golf. And that smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole carpark, smelled like.... ....speed.
One day they're going to ban them.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 09:13 PM
I'm both echoing everyone else and saying enjoy what time you can with her. My mother went the same way, not that the idiot doctors could recognize it. Gods be with you my friend.
Wolf wins every fight but the one where he dies, fangs locked around the throat of his opponent.
Currently writing BROBd
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-23-2019, 10:29 PM
Can't add much beyond what everyone else has already said, I'm sorry you gotta go through this Fox but I'd like to echo what others have said that its a small boon that your mom at least has this choice.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-24-2019, 06:18 AM
...
...
Gorram it Fox! what really hurts my soul here is that I have seen both sides of that equation and as much as I want MY mom to fight as long as possible, I can totally support your mom's choice.
Hear that thunder rolling till it seems to rock the sky?
Thats' every ship in Grayson's Navy taking up the cry!
NO QUARTER!
No Quarter by Echo's Children
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-24-2019, 03:18 PM
Been there with my grandmother. My sympathies.
“We can never undo what we have done. We can never go back in time. We write history with our decisions and our actions. But we also write history with our responses to those actions. We can leave the pain and the damage in our wake, unattended, or we can do the work of acknowledging and fixing, to whatever extent possible, the harm that we have caused.”
— On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World by Danya Ruttenberg
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-24-2019, 03:20 PM
I can’t add much that anyone else hasn’t said already. But yes, ending things on your own terms and forewarned is about as much consideration as death will allow. She has the grace to let go. May you find the grace and strength to let her.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-26-2019, 04:11 PM
I'm really sorry for what this is and will mean for you, but for what it's worth, we'll all be here for you too. My sympathies for your ordeal. 
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-28-2019, 05:28 PM
My condolences, Fox.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-28-2019, 06:09 PM
I'm sorry Fox. I wish there was something I could say, but I'd only be trying to add a silver lining.
But all the same, we're here if you ever need to vent.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-28-2019, 06:32 PM
Pre-emptive condolences.
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RE: Sad Fox news
08-29-2019, 11:11 PM
Being able to choose how to die is a blessing. Not the one we want, but at least it means one gets choice until the end.
A couple years back, my grandmother was moved into assisted living for various reasons, and no longer living with her family, she went downhill pretty fast. In a few months, she went from playing cards to not really responsive. Mama and I flew out to Tulsa to and spent a few hours over a couple days at her side. We couldn't really have a conversation with her, but just be companionable. The time came to say our goodbyes, and we flew back home; by the time the plane landed, Grandmother had passed on. I wish we had visited sooner, but I think somehow, she was able to choose when she let go. At age 101 it's hard to call it a tragedy, but a little blessing makes it hurt just a little less.
"Kitto daijoubu da yo." - Sakura Kinomoto
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