So the lovely wife and the Darkling took a trip over the weekend. TLW asked me to pen a note stating that I knew about the trip. (A colleague of her was once hassled for taking a child across hill and dale without a note from the other parent.) It struck me as an odd request, but I ran with it.
To Whom it may concern,
(That would be you, you nosey bastard.)
Robert Andrew Dark is travelling via
train with his mother, Cynthia Lynn Dark to visit my parents.
He is not being abducted, kidnapped,
absconded with, or otherwise removed from my presence without my
knowledge or permission.
He is also not being abducted by
aliens, as my lovely wife is from earth. Were it suddenly revealed
to be otherwise, I would be just as surprised as you; but also proud
as it means I would share at least one thing in common with Captain
James T. Kirk of the star ship Enterprise.
Andrew and his mother are not running
away to join the circus. There is a genetic predisposition in my
family to react to clowns, mimes, and sports mascots with sudden and
quite horrendous violence. Sure the thought of my offspring
co-opting a medium sized wheat thresher and driving it through a
congress of clowns, causing a bright, Pagliacci tinted rain is
wonderful; but no such activity is planned. Andrew is visiting his
grandfather to celebrate the senior Dark's birthday. If they are
planning a visit to the circus, I have no knowledge of it, and cannot
be held responsible for the terrible things than ensue.
My lovely wife has confirmed that she
has no intention of using the opportunity afforded by the trip to
sell Andrew to gypsies, the Blues Brothers, the black market organ
trade, the Denver Broncos, the People's Front of Judea (not the
popular front – splitters) or the shape-changing space-lizards
described by crackpot David Icke. Funny enough, we once tried to
sell David Icke, but E-Bay made us take down the sale.
Should you need to confirm any of this,
I can be reached at XXX-XXX-XXXX or by e-mail at [url=mailto:revdark@magma.ca[/url].
With the exception of two hours at the gym and an occasional foray
out to walk the dog, I will be power watching a season of Archer and
doing a jigsaw puzzle; which is the wild life of hedonism that I
indulge in in the absence of wife and child. There is also a new
season of Luther, but that may be too much.
Cheers,
Shayne Dark
P.S. Please do not let Andrew drive
the train, I have oft observed him playing with Thomas the Tank
Engine and his friends, and it can only end in tears.
To Whom it may concern,
(That would be you, you nosey bastard.)
Robert Andrew Dark is travelling via
train with his mother, Cynthia Lynn Dark to visit my parents.
He is not being abducted, kidnapped,
absconded with, or otherwise removed from my presence without my
knowledge or permission.
He is also not being abducted by
aliens, as my lovely wife is from earth. Were it suddenly revealed
to be otherwise, I would be just as surprised as you; but also proud
as it means I would share at least one thing in common with Captain
James T. Kirk of the star ship Enterprise.
Andrew and his mother are not running
away to join the circus. There is a genetic predisposition in my
family to react to clowns, mimes, and sports mascots with sudden and
quite horrendous violence. Sure the thought of my offspring
co-opting a medium sized wheat thresher and driving it through a
congress of clowns, causing a bright, Pagliacci tinted rain is
wonderful; but no such activity is planned. Andrew is visiting his
grandfather to celebrate the senior Dark's birthday. If they are
planning a visit to the circus, I have no knowledge of it, and cannot
be held responsible for the terrible things than ensue.
My lovely wife has confirmed that she
has no intention of using the opportunity afforded by the trip to
sell Andrew to gypsies, the Blues Brothers, the black market organ
trade, the Denver Broncos, the People's Front of Judea (not the
popular front – splitters) or the shape-changing space-lizards
described by crackpot David Icke. Funny enough, we once tried to
sell David Icke, but E-Bay made us take down the sale.
Should you need to confirm any of this,
I can be reached at XXX-XXX-XXXX or by e-mail at [url=mailto:revdark@magma.ca[/url].
With the exception of two hours at the gym and an occasional foray
out to walk the dog, I will be power watching a season of Archer and
doing a jigsaw puzzle; which is the wild life of hedonism that I
indulge in in the absence of wife and child. There is also a new
season of Luther, but that may be too much.
Cheers,
Shayne Dark
P.S. Please do not let Andrew drive
the train, I have oft observed him playing with Thomas the Tank
Engine and his friends, and it can only end in tears.
