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Re-reading "A Protector's Pride", and this scene jumped out at me:
Quote:"… I thought you were amusing, but now I can see that you're rather creepy…" Gin said carelessly. He's grown so fast! "I think I see why Aizen-taicho is interested in you…"
Ichigo sweat-dropped. "I'm not gay."
Gin looked at him oddly, his smile becoming somewhat strained. "That's not what I meant." He took on a pensive expression. "Then again… I've never known him to be with a woman. Not even his old fukutaicho, Hinamori, who was so desperate to please! He could have had her in a minute had he chosen…"
"Don't you think that you should have known whether he was gay before you and Tousen ran off with him? I mean, with his hypnosis abilities, and you being off in a dark secluded location for months, who knows what he's done to you?" Ichigo pointed out.
There was an awkward silence for a few seconds as neither of them moved, before both shuddered in unison. "Let's just forget we ever had this conversation and get back to the fight," Gin suggested.
"Yeah."
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.
Its always interesting catching up with past generations pop culture... I think my ultimate on that was when my dad made a pop culture reference to a 'My Three Sons' episode he saw 30 years or so previous... and I corrected him on it as I'd seen the episode the previous week. He was dumb founded and thunder struck at the same time.
The Tommy martial arts reference is better than you may think... in the movie Tommy has a pinball camp where you learn to master pinball while in ear muff, wearing a blindfold, and biting down on a cork. Its actually a coherent and semi-logical obscure martial art training method.
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Quote:Its actually a coherent and semi-logical obscure martial art training method.
By the standards of Genma Saotome, at least.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
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Bob Schroeck Wrote:Quote:Its actually a coherent and semi-logical obscure martial art training method.
By the standards of Genma Saotome, at least. The thought that some standards when compared to, Genma "Throw my sausage wrapped kid into a pit of starving cats," Saotome might not look coherent and at least semi-logical is frightning.
"I eat a frog every morning so nothing else will be scary."
"Saner than Genma"
"I keep punching this block even after I get blisters."
"Hmm. Not healthy, but not as daft as Genma."
"I vote (insert your non-preferred political party) in every election."
"I think you're an idiot. But I'd rather have you make decisions than Genma."
"I'm the one who decided to make Gendo Ikari the local school master when we got stuck in the multi-universe crossover."
"Was Genma also in the running?"
"Yes."
"Then we won't defenestrate you. Yet."
:}
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Will the transhumanist future have catgirls? Does Japan still exist? Well, there is your answer.
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I guess "Better Than Genma" will be the slogan for the Palin Election Committee in 2012.
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com
"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."
Genma's training does actually work. Tommy's training does make you a better pinballer and makes you learn situational awareness on a different level... it also causes you to snap and riot. Maybe the camp should have been indoors. Seriously, Genma has a 100% success rate for turning out skilled, powerful students. The trick with Genma is to get him to actually agree with the end goal you want. Its his methods in question not his results.
The Wanderer
Unregistered
Also, mind the side effects, and any other fine print involved.
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Quote:Seriously, Genma has a 100% success rate for turning out skilled, powerful students.
A sample set of 1 really isn't statistically trustworthy...
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
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Quote:A sample set of 1 really isn't statistically trustworthy...
Bob, I present you with 'Anything Goes Martial Arts Statistics'
and therein lies the reason I always bet on Genma.
"No can brain today. Want cheezeburger."
From NGE: Nobody Dies, by Gregg Landsman
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5579457/1/NGE_Nobody_Dies
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.... You know, this little argument is perfect for DSKS. 
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In which Zeke would point out the old statistician's joke, "If you want a straight-line graph, plot two points." Genma hasn't even done that much - you can plot almost any graph on his data set. (Or should I say "datum set"?)
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."
- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
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Which also brings to mind the other old saying about statisticians; which also proves that Genma has already mastered Anything Goes Martial Statitics...
(You know the one. The one about Liars, damn liars, and Statiticians?)
Hear that thunder rolling till it seems to split the sky?
That's every ship in Grayson's Navy taking up the cry-
NO QUARTER!!!
-- "No Quarter", by Echo's Children
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Another good one: "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts...for support rather than illumination."-- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
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What if Almost Everybody was Shirou's Servant
Quote:"I'm not gay!" Lancer yelled as he stomped his foot on the ground. "Like I said before, I'm as straight as a lance!"
"Is that so?" Rider said, tilting her head curiously. "Then you don't want to go over to that half naked, muscular man and try to thrust your thick, long rod into him as he tries to smack you around with his giant, hard club of his?"
Lancer's eye twitched. That was technically an accurate description of what he wanted to do, but…
Quote:"Still – there is no doubt that that knight over there is King Arthur."
"Just how can you be so sure?" Rider asked, understanding that the truth behind legends was occasionally… different from how it was told. After all, she was one such misunderstanding. Besides, it was easy to see why someone would make that mistake. Saber happened to be, for lack of a better term, flat.
"It's simple, really," Ilya explained cheerfully. "You see, we summoned her in the last war."
"No, there's no way that can be true," Lancer said, shaking his head. There was a limit to how blind people could be in any era; mistaking a girl as their King, that just couldn't be right. There was no way they could have done that.
Unless… he was the one who was mistaken from the start. He had assumed that Saber was a girl, but he had never really taken a close enough look at her…
No. He wouldn't accept it. He couldn't accept it. There was no way that Saber had a penis. Absolutely no way.
"Come on," Lancer pleaded, turning to Saber. "Say something!"
Saber turned to meet Lancer's gaze, before casting her eyes downward. "No," she said after a moment, deciding that it was pointless to lie to Lancer. Ilyasviel would be their only enemy, and she already knew. "It's the truth. I was the King of Britain."
Lancer dropped his spear in shock, falling to his knees. "Th-then that means I just kissed a King," he said as he shook his head, trying to deny the truth.
"If it makes you feel any better, I'm no longer a king," Saber said.
It didn't make Lancer feel better. At all.
Quote:"Okay," Lancer said, annoyed that Archer had so easily beaten his challenge – even if it hadn't been intended as such in the first place. "So you guessed Saber's and Caster's identity. That doesn't mean anything. I bet you don't know who I am."
Archer looked at Lancer, examining the other knight class servant with an investigative gaze. Lancer simply stood smugly, sure that there was no way for Archer to figure out who he was. And, apparently, Lancer was right.
"You're correct," Archer said, yet despite his "defeat," he grinned. "I don't recognize you at all. You must not have been that important."
Somehow, Lancer felt he was the one that was losing. "Hey now," he said defensively. "Just because you don't know who I am doesn't mean I wasn't amazing! It's your own fault for being ignorant of my legend."
Archer rolled his eyes, shrugging. "Right, because everybody should know about the guy who runs about in a blue leotard, trying to thrust his long, thick spear into any 'worthy opponent' that he can find."
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
From chapter 10 of Walkabout:
Quote:She felt one of those self-same runes shift, and hastily scried its source. She saw a masked figure – not one of the mages who'd been chasing her, so if what the vodouisant had told her was true, he had to be... "That spah is sappin' mah sentry wards," she muttered. "Oh, no..."
[url=mailto:BYapes@aol.com[/url]
Brian Y.
Seed Chronicles
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New Blood
Quote:Glancing down at her rather generous chest, Seras stated, “You know, over the years I definitely came to appreciate being dead as these kittens would have been a massive pain once they started to sag. I’m over a hundred! Could you imagine?”
Ellie clutched her hands to her ears and said, “Not listening! Not listening!”
Alex considered the statement clinically for a moment before he said, “You know, from one amorphous killing machine to another, I must ask from a simple structural engineering perspective…”
“Telekinesis,” Seras replied with the same tone as what had happened in 1997.
“Really?” Alex asked incredulously.
“You seemed more accepting of the Nazi vampires,” Seras pointed out.
“Yeah, but that’s Nazi vampires. I’ve dealt with that kind of crap before. On the other hand I can’t tell if you’re just bullshitting me here,” Alex point out.
“This is insane! This is madness!” Ellie cried out.
Alex and Seras both lit up for a moment and faced each other with excited, expectant looks before their expressions fell and they both hung their heads, muttering, “Wouldn’t get the joke…”
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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This lamp, the bare bulb is kind of anno-- never mind, ShayneT just hung a lampshade on it... ( Legend, chapter 10)
Quote:“Our primary mission is exploration,” Deanna said. “Which involves risk.
We do sometimes have confrontations that lead to a loss of life.”
“So what do you really do here?” Buffy asked. “If everybody is so perfect that people hardly ever need counseling?”
“I help the Captain evaluate encounters with new species.”
“So someone yells at you on the radio and you turn and tell him, ‘I think he’s angry’” Buffy said dryly.
“Sometimes,” Deanna admitted. “I can also help him tell if someone is lying.”
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Quote:"How 'ya holdin' up there, sweetcheeks?"
The young man blinked.
"Um...fine," he finally managed to squeak out. His eyes, however, said 'no, no I am most certainly not fine. I am terrified of dying here, and, provided we get out of this unscathed, I am going to cry. I am going to cry hard, and for a very long time.'
He didn't say that, of course. Shinji couldn't afford to not act manly around Asuka.
Because that would mean she would pick up the slack.
Quote:"How can I not panic?" Shinji almost cried. "There's a bullet in me!"
"It's alright..." Asuka sighed. She was not good at this kind of thing. "Injuries happen all the time in this line of work. The important thing to remember is that bulletwounds are only fatal in certain places." She forced a smile. "And hey! Since you're a robot, bullets are probably even less dangerous for you!"
Shinji flinched, either from Rei's redressing of his wound or from Asuka's wording. Either way, his head sunk. "Don't remind me..."
Asuka reeled.
Not good at all.
"Sorry, I forgot. Still a touchy subject." A nervous chuckle wanted to escape her lungs, but she refused to be that cliched. "But you shouldn't worry about not being human. I mean, Rei's an alien clone after all!"
"I am several clones, and I am only half alien."
"Take the damn newspaper off your head, already."
Quote:As the other monoliths bickered, 17 was silent in thought.
"...Ah, I see."
The meeting once again returned to silence. "You do?"
"Of course." 17 stated. "And I am quite satisfied with that sort of arrangement."
"And why is that?"
"Why else?" 17 chuckled. "Because it means I go last."
http://forums.spacebattles.com/showthread.php?t=187354]Cutey Shinji
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."
- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
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Cecilia Kurita Wrote:"Missus Davion, can Hanse come out and play?"
Riding the Dragon
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.
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Quote:"It's not actually a potion of youth," she admitted shyly. "To be honest, I created a set of transformation potions: Three to give the drinker the body of a young man, and another three to give the drinker the body of a younger woman."
"That's still pretty impressive," Shirou said, whistling appreciatively. He couldn't imagine anybody of the current era who could do that. Of course, his understanding of magic was pretty limited, but she managed something like that in a single night with little preparation.
"Thank you," Caster said. "If only Saber thought the same way."
Shirou blinked. "Did she have a problem with it?"
"…just a small one," Caster said with a weak laugh, holding up her hand to her face while she concealed a blush. "I accidentally gave her the wrong one."
"…"
"Don't worry!" Caster said, holding up her hands. "She actually didn't change all that much. Please don't tell her I said that," she added after a short pause.
Shirou sighed. Already something had gone wrong. It wasn't exactly a good way to start the day. "Wait a second," Shirou said, blinking as he realized something. "Didn't you say you only made three of each potion?"
"Yes," Caster said.
"And, you said Assassin and Lancer already took theirs, right?"
"Yes."
"And nothing went wrong, right?"
Caster shook her head. "They both turned into teenage men as planned," Caster said as she tilted her head. "Is there a problem I'm not aware of?"
Shirou thought about it for a moment… before smiling. "No. There's no problem at all. You've done a wonderful job, Caster."
What if Almost Everybody was Shirou's Servant
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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From Generation Lost Chapter 8
Quote:"So it seemed like a longshot that had no way of working, and you dismissed
it?" Ranma surmised.
"When you put it that way. It kinda does seem up your alley," Gos
admitted.
Later, same chapter...
Quote:"So, what else does it do?"
"Well, I could twirl, spin, give a magic girl pose and then blast something
with a huge purification blast."
"Purification?" Sarah asked as she shifted out of her template.
"Yup! It'll fry just about anything it touches," Sailor Rose smiled.
She then closed her eyes and in a flash she had returned to her blouse and skirt.
"How the hell is that purification?"
"The leftover atoms would be really clean ...
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From Tales of the FoxCat, Chapter 11
Quote:"TenTen-chan, is this true?""Sensei?" The weapons specialist tried to ignore the sucking chasm of doom in her stomach.
"That
you carried out an assault on the council chambers?" Gai elaborated,
causing Neji's head to snap up as his boredom suddenly vanished. Lee's
mouth dropped into a silent 'oh' as their teammate confirmed the charge.
"Y-Yes Sensei." She stuttered, her eyes dropping to her feet.
"That you used a smoke tag and practice kunai on
the council members themselves?" Their jounin instructor pressed,
earning a smaller nod from the girl. Neji and Lee stared at the girl and
her atypical behavior with bug eyes.
"Yes sensei."
Gai
nodded solemnly and continued down the list. "That you, in fact,
participated in this assault in order to dispatch a target in the very
presence of the Hokage, putting him at risk?"
Neji all but choked, making TenTen's next embarrassed confirmation barely audible. "Yes, Sensei."
"Hold
out your hand, TenTen-chan. It is time for you to receive you
punishment." Gai ordered in a grave voice, and the girl could only
wonder what punishment was about to befall her. He would probably triple
her weights. On top of what Satome sensei already made her wear.
Make her run around in one of those horrid green jump suits. Train
until she died. The torturous possibilities were-
"Bad TenTen."
Gai Maito batted her hand lightly, then turned to the other two gaping
genin. "Now let's all strive to match the flaming pillar of her youthful
example!"
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http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?562 ... st13817642]Shadowjack's watching episode 98 of Sailor Moon S...Quote:Mako: "Usagi wants to study properly, and Ami was late and forgot something. This must be what going mad feels like."
Mina: "Obviously, their minds have been swapped by evil magic. Rei, you'd better get up an exorcism."
Rei: "¿Perhaps we should wait until after brainwashed Usagi has brought her grades up?"
Quote:Artemis: "I spy with my little eye, something that starts with S."
Luna: "Is that Ami being marched along like a prisoner by that biker girl Haruka?!"
Artemis: "No, it's the beautiful sunset—Wait, WHAT?! …That's one strict cram school."
Quote:Suddenly
Ami: "No 'suddenly!' There is no 'suddenly!' The episode is over, roll credits!"
Kaolinite: "That's what you think!"
Ami: "Yes, that's what I think! …Damn it!"
Quote:Ami: "Do you even know what those mean?"
Mina: "I don't know what they don't mean, if that's what you mean."
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."
- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
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Heh. From Magical Lady Warrior Carter...
Quote:Of course, I imagine this is too simple for some people, so I've prepared an
OMAKE
Time seemed to stop the instant Sam took Raising Heart into her hand, as the Device automatically initiated Compatibility Testing Mode in response to detecting a potential new master.
[Welcome to the Intelligent Device Raising Heart's Compatibility Test!] a cheerful, yet robotic-sounding female voice echoed through her mind. [Records indicate Potential New User is Named Samantha Carter. Is this correct?]
"Uh... yes?" Sam replied, unsure of what exactly was happening but willing to play along until she found out more.
[Very good! I am Raising Heart, and I hope we prove to be highly compatible, Samantha! Now, shall we begin? Please state your date of birth, the religion or religions you ascribe to, your sexual orientation and any nicknames you prefer. Six 20-sided dice will be made available to you, please roll them and then discard the lowest number. I'll now ask you a series of simple questions designed to paint a clearer picture of your personality - please answer honestly and to the best of your ability! Question 1: If given the choice between reading a book and attending a party, which would you prefer? Question 2: When faced with a challenge, do you rely more on past experiences or your natural instincts? Question 3: Which is more important, justice or mercy? Question 4...]
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From Smart Weapons, which I happened to run across again after spotting it last year...
Quote: The missle sat in it's launcher.
"What the hell is happening around here?" Captain Snell
demanded, hammering his fists on the armrests of his command
chair. "Why didn't the missle launch that time?"
The weapons officer slowly took off his headset. "The missle is
saying, 'Thank you for using the manual firing system. All of our
operators are busy, but please hold. Your call will be handled in the
order it was received'".
Phone mail? On a missle launching system?
Snell was flabergasted. "Anything else lieutenant?" The young
officer put the headset back up to his ear for a second. "Sir, I know
you won't believe this, but I swear it sounds like the missle is
humming 'My Cheri Amour'."
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Will the transhumanist future have catgirls? Does Japan still exist? Well, there is your answer.
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