ROTFL: The comeback

[DHBirr]

 
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[ECSNorway]

“Shouldn’t having several thousand years of furry porn stuffed into my skull done massive brain damage?” Naruto deadpanned with a flat stare..

Kyuubi gives Naruto the birds and the bees talk, Kitsune-style.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3921454/1/V ... nd_Kitsune
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[ECSNorway]

There were, however, ways to catch the attention of Fortune and make her smile on you, if you had enough of skill. If you had the skill, the instinct and courage bordering on insanity, you didn't just get her to smile at you, but to actually have her lips touch yours with passion and blessing.

Naruto had the skills, the instinct, the power and courage that went past borders ordinary people called sanity a long time ago. He wasn't willing to settle for a smile or a kiss - he was going to have Lady Luck naked, eager and moaning his name tonight.

Reload, chapter 6.
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[ECSNorway]

Another bit of "People Lie" turned up over on TFF...

"Hey, sorry I didn't make the run this morning," Naruto said, yawning slightly. "I had a late night meeting with Hinata's father and a
few Hyuga guards about how my explosions of youth will not be happening in her bedroom late at night. All things considered, you could say I was feeling sort
of beat this morning."

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[DHBirr]

OK, I am thoroughly not knowledgeable about Naruto, but that extended metaphor about Lady Luck tickled the Raymond Chandler fan in me
so much that I had to keep a copy of it. Mooses gracious, Norway.
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[anowack]

ECSNorway wrote:

---

Sakura: "That was my best f**kin' coat!"




Anko: "Well then, you'd better find something else to f**k in!"




(From 'One Hundred Days').

Just catching up on this thread, unless I'm suffering from a serious brain fart, this isn't from One Hundred Days. Not quite my style of humor.

---

Aaron Nowack

[robkelk]

From the behind-the-scenes discussion for Fenspace:

Cobalt:> Then having idea of Hardsuit in Landmate in Motoslave in Battlemover.

Mal:> ..okay, I think we've hit the concept of mecha turducken.

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[TheTwisted1]

A great summary of Ranma 1/2

He shot an incredulous look right back at her.




"B-but, Raven! Everyone in Nerima is an emotionally crippled martial artist. If we didn't have violence, then how the heck would we
communicate?"




Again, her eyebrow quirked up, it was so endearing, as she looked at him, apparently trying to discern if he was actually being serious or not.




"Have you ever tried talking?




"Well . . .yeah, but it usually just results in more violence."

"Dark Titans" Chapter 25

--The Twisted One

---

"If you
wish to converse with me, define your
terms."

--Voltaire

[ECSNorway]

Just catching up on this thread, unless I'm suffering from a serious brain fart, this isn't from One Hundred Days. Not quite my style of humor.

Hrm. I could've sworn it was from either 100 Days or Suiren, and I'd just re-read Suiren so it wasn't from there... and I don't
see much other Sakura/Anko ficcage out there, unfortunately.
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[Valles]

It was one of the 'Naruto travels back in time' ones.
===========

===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."

[Bob Schroeck]

"Did you go crazy?"

"Even worse, I went back to Canada."

-- From "Sana's Alice", chapter 3 by Henry Cobb (recently posted on the FFML)
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

[ECSNorway]

"Memories Lie" continues to amuse:

"Hey, Hinata?" Tenten said out loud, not taking her gaze from Naruto.




"Yes?" Hinata replied.




"Naruto said you use your byakugan to settle arguments between him and Sasuke about girl's underwear."




Hinata tilted her head down as if she were looking at the ground for a moment. Finally, she said, "That again? Sasuke looks great in dark, low cut
panties but really needs ruffles up top, even if he does think they make him look unmanly. Naruto looks great in almost everything, but his insistence on
orange makes him look like he's smuggling fruit in his bra."




Lee's jaw dropped in astonishment. Even Gai didn't know what to say to that.




Tenten sighed and shook her head. "Damn. Alright, Naruto, I admit it, your Hyuga is funnier than our Hyuga."

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[ECSNorway]

Even more:

“First, we shall have a hearty lunch!” Gai proclaimed. “And then we shall train our youthfulness to the fullest! I will ensure that none of the animals return to the field while you six evacuate the inhabitants. We will save all the animals within two hours, or we will perform five hundred high kicks!”

“Yes, Gai-sensei!” Lee cried enthusiastically. “And if we cannot perform five hundred high kicks, we shall do one thousand pushups!”

“That’s it, Lee!” Gai replied happily. “And if we cannot do one thousand pushups, we shall run three hundred laps around Konoha!”

Hinata spoke up in the same breathless excited tone they had been using. “And if we cannot run three hundred laps around Konoha, we shall beat Gai-sensei to death with a rock!”

“Yosh,” Naruto, Sasuke, and, surprisingly, Tenten replied.

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[ECSNorway]

Let Loose The Plot Bunnies of War.

Vathara's Contribution:

April 18, 2008: I offer an utterly insane crossover plotbunny to the world. Bleach / Girl Genius. People being dragged on adventures: Ichigo and crew, meet Angela and crew. Misunderstood rivals: Ishida and Gil should have plenty in common. Mad scientists: Aizen, Kurotsuchi, and Urahara, meet - well, just about every spark on the continent. Utter chaos and explosions: 11th Division, meet Jaegermonsters.

And the HAT. You know the Jaegers would be in awe of Urahara's hat!

Drop me a line if you write this!

May 04, 2008: Vorkosigan/Bleach bunny. Available for adoption. Please.

"What'd you say your name was?"
"Miles Naismith Vorkosigan."
Kenpachi grinned toothily. "Oi! Ikkaku! Bring over the new girl... what do you mean, who? Taura! You know, the lady who looks like Komamura's prettier sister?"

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

[Morganite]

“That was my only fucking coat! I liked it!” Sakura protested as she grabbed the box of gear that was shoved into her arms.
“You’d better find something else to fuck in, then.” Anko said cheerfully, and vanished.[/quote

From http://www.fanfiction.net/u/249533/DrgnDrake

Can't find any sign of a fic it came from though. '.'

-Morgan.

[Xenoproctologist]

"That was my only fucking coat! I liked it!" Sakura protested as she grabbed the box of gear that was shoved into her arms.

"You'd better find something else to fuck in, then." Anko said cheerfully, and vanished.[/quote

From http://www.fanfiction.net/u/249533/DrgnDrake

Can't find any sign of a fic it came from though. '.'

-Morgan.

 I think that was from one of the revisions of Suiren by Eimii.  Can't see any evidence of it in the current one, though.

[Morganite]

Hmmm. Since ECSNorway said he'd just re-read Suiren so was sure it wasn't from there, I'd discounted the possibility, but being in a previous
revision could explain it. (And it *does* seem like that story's style of humor.)

I suppose someone could email Eimii and ask. But probably not me, since I'm super-lazy when it comes to email. '.'

-Morgan.

[Valles]

No, it's one of the 'Future!Naruto goes back in time to relive his life better' stories... For the Love of My Friends, maybe? One of the older
ones.
===========

===============================================
"V, did you do something foolish?"
"Yes, and it was glorious."

[Morganite]

Well, whatever it is, I couldn't find those lines in a google search. So either it's not quoted exactly, or... something else. '.'

On a different note...

Sasuke started to pace, waving the broken bottle around angrily. "What the fuck is up with him? First he wants to make me into a coward and a backstabber, then he wants me to kill my best friend, then he wants me to fuck my daughters -- what did he want me to grow up to be? Orochimaru?"

From "Best Laid Plans" by Asuka. (Not linking directly, because some people might not want to be surprised with Naruto/Sasuke pseudoyuri and pseudohet. And smut. Mustn't forget the smut.)

-Morgan.

[Shepherd]

"I practice Anything Goes Radiation Abatement and Remediation," Jeff said with a completely straight face, he was shocked the comment didn't
elicit any further questions, no matter how patently ridiculous it was.




-Sailor Jupiter Interregnum 1

----------------------------------------------------

"Anyone can be a winner if their definition of victory is flexible enough." - The DM of the Rings XXXV

[Black Aeronaut]

"Well, what DID you learn?"

"Ok, well, this is what I've got so far: Sex is an activity between a man and a woman, in which they get naked and bounce around the room
together. You have to wear protective gear, or else you'll get diseases and pregnant, but at the same time, you have to be naked. It makes guys and girls
mad to talk about, and Anko is a scary, scary woman. Don't go to her house, seriously. Um...Oh, people use sex to get things they want, like ramen and
money. Some people use sex to 'vent', I guess because it's dangerous and takes their minds off of their problems. Oh, almost forgot: Women use
sex to say 'sorry', but I don't know why. Last, if I ever need drugs for any reason, I'll go find Gai," Naruto concluded, sitting beside
his teacher up in the tree.

Letting out a sigh that was hidden under the onset of a gentle breeze, Kakashi mumbled, "The saddest part of that whole thing is that some of it was
pretty accurate. You still don't know how to have sex, though?"

Naruto shook his head, "Which means you have to tell me, now!"

From Fetish? What's a Fetish? http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3313914/1/F ... s_A_Fetish

[DHBirr]

From the Gateway to the Goddesses site:

You know you're a hopeless Oh My Goddess fan when:


6. The debate over whether to watch OMG OAVs sub-ed or dub-ed has ceased to concern you because you've already memorized all of the dialog either
way.

-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[Xenoproctologist]

“Gendo, I’m about as close to a friend as you have in this world.
I’ve known you for the better part of a decade and a half now. I think
I know a little something about your character.” Kozo pointed one of
those bony old man fingers at his face. “See, you can only do one thing
at a time, and you need that one thing as a focus to obsess on. When I
first met you, it was all about getting ahead. You were just some
street thug going all out for a university degree. Then when it got
that you couldn’t find a job with your precious prize you fell back to
being the best street thug with a doctorate there could be. And then
you met Yui.”
“Shut up, Fuyutsuki.”
“Yui never said a bad
word about you, Gendo. She trusted you in a way she never did with me.
And when I started working here I saw why. You lived for Yui. GEHIRN
came second. Hell, sometimes I wondered if the only reason you got into
bed with SEELE was because Yui was so deep in that muck already.”
“I’m serious, Fuyutsuki.”
“You were also a good father, as hard as that is to remember.”
Except
for that time I was watching Shinji and he almost drowned in the
bathtub. Or when I found him playing with that can of bug spray. God,
Yui never would have forgiven me if she knew how terrible I was at
being a father. “I will hit you and break your brittle old man face.”
“Screw off, Rokobungi,” snapped Kozo. “Let me get to my point.”
“Fine. But only because you’re holding the bourbon hostage.”

Taking Sights, ch. 4 by Lavanya Six

[Herr Bad Moon]

Awkward male bonding scene from the show Avatar:  The Last Airbender episode The Boiling Rock:  Part 1.
Sokka:  Really?  You didn't leave behind anybody you cared about?
Zuko:  Well, I did have a girlfriend.  Mai.
Sokka:  That gloomy girl who sighs a lot?
Zuko:  Yeah.  Everyone in the Fire Nation thinks I'm a traitor.  I couldn't drag her into it.
Sokka [completely straight-faced]:  My first girlfriend turned into the moon.
Zuko [also completely straight-faced]:  That's rough buddy.
---
Jon
"And that must have caused my dad's brain to break in half, replaced by a purely mechanical engine of revenge!"

[Morganite]

Baki grinned. “Sure.” He said, then waited for Gaara to take a seat, pick up a pen and lean his elbows on his desk. “Although, come to think of it. Your sister Temari was the product of make-up sex. And right there too.” Baki pointed ruthlessly at the spot where Gaara's elbows were resting.

Gaara slammed his hands against the desk and pushed with strength enough to slide backwards, hitting the wall behind him.

His former sensei was struggling not to laugh as Gaara stared at his desk as if it were a thing possessed. “Burn it.” His whisper sounded strangled as he pointed toward the large wooden desk.

From "Marry My Father Please?".

-Morgan.