I guess I should put a warning for attempted suicide on this, though not really, under the IC circumstances. Consider yourself so advised.







I dropped the knife with a shudder, and slouched back on the park bench to put my head in my hands. "Another life, but still no goddamn willpower," I lambasted myself. "If I'm this afraid of a little pain, I'll never get any stronger." I knew what the future of this world held, after all, even if I wasn't the biggest fan. Getting pulped by a runaway truck was supposed to happen before being reborn in a new world, but instead it had been how my Quirk had finally manifested, popping back up good as new and just enough stronger and faster to notice in a few days as soon as I got over the disorientation of the out-of-body experience and concentrated my attention in one place. It was a powerful ability for information gathering with just that diffuse, invisible presence, but if it kept enhancing my body as well I could get strong enough to have a meaningful impact on what was coming in the next two or three years, or at least enough to stand a chance in the UA admission exam to be close enough to try.

"... if I wasn't afraid of spilling a little blood," I sighed again, bending down to pick up the kitchen knife I'd snuck out with.

I fumbled it again as a cheerful voice replied, "I could help with that!"

I wasn't expecting anyone to interrupt me, having intentionally sought out the least popular, most overgrown area of the park. Had been too caught up in my thoughts to notice them getting close. The voice was a girl's, and looking up she was a cute blond about my own age, with a slightly too-intense look in her catlike eyes to really mesh with any other part of it. "I'm Himiko Toga, nice to meet you. You were saying something about needing some blood?"

I vaguely recognized that name, but...? Oh, right, the literal bloodthirsty murder-loli. Yet she didn't have the careless mess of a hair-non-style and at our age she probably hadn't even gone beyond attacking small animals like the pigeon I belatedly noticed she had clenched in one hand. And she flinched as I reflexively grimaced and made a disgusted noise, before exclaiming, "Seriously, a pigeon? Those things have all kinds of parasites and diseases... you might as well fondle a public toilet!" Oddly enough, the addition seemed to restore her good mood, even as she dropped the bird and wiped her hand against her skirt, wrinkling her own nose at the thought.

Still, this could work out.

"Nice to meet you, Himiko Toga. I have the feeling we could be great friends."

---==- + -==---

Not my kink, not my waifu, but it was an idea that wouldn't stop meowing and scratching at the door until I let it out.

This is something I stumbled over just now that might be of interest to folks on Resurgence -- back in 2006, a Ph.D candidate (in Philosophy) submitted a dissertation based around City of Heroes as it existed back then -- Information Behavior and Meaning-Making in Virtual Play Spaces: A Case Study of City of Heroes (PDF link). I unintentionally DLed a copy and ended up reading some of it. A lot of it seems to be taken up with just explaining what's happening in the game to the readers, who are assumed to be ignorant of MMORPGs, but in between there are some very cogent observations on the nature of gaming and the mind of the gamer.

Rock. Beats Handwaved super-Laser.

-------
To: Blackrider@roughriders.fen
From: Jet.Jaguar@Frigga.fen
Subj: This is not a tool of honour.

Hey Ben,

You said you've been working in some rad' areas and we have a little - ahem - experience with that. I know when I mentioned first it you said you'd be interested in one.

I can't take credit for it. It's been sort of fiddled over by a dozen people here who were sick of having their phones cooked, accreting useful features the way planets form, but this is the final version. It's started off as a modified clone of a Seagull ST19, printed off locally. The only fancy part on the workings parts are the hairspring and balance.

So, how you use it.

That's a 24-hour watch face, giving you local time in space. You set that with the 1st, centre lug on the right. You'll have to use it to wind it up, but it'll run for around 30 hours off a full wind.
On the top strap lug, that's a 3-stage radio-phosphorecent indicator. Green == Some Radiation. Yellow == Dangerous Radiation. Red == Potentially Lethal Radiation. It gives you an idea what you're facing.  As for why they're Hello Kitty-shaped
On the bottom lug as your quartz fibre rate-meter with an attenuator if you're getting into a strong radiation field.

Top right button starts and stops the chrono'. Bottom right zero's the chrono' and triggers a piezoelectric reset of the rate meter. It's a bit heavy because you don't want to do either accidentally.

Anyway, the basic way to use it is to use the rate meter - either over the space of a minute for low radiation fields, or direct for high radiation fields - to figure out the dose-rate. Reset the chronograph, and time your exposure to estimate your total dose. It's most accurate around 1000uR/s - it's not great, but it's not terrible either.

Top left knob sets the warning dose limit, using the fourth hand on the display. The bottom left knob lets you set the warning chime to be off,  triggered by the hour hand, the minute hand, or the second hand - depending on how strong the radiation field is.

The case, dial and back-plate are made of iron scavenged from an old power transformer that caught fire, and with a silicon hairspring you can get pretty close to an active field magnet on one of our reactors without upsetting it. Glass is just domed lucite - easy to fix.

We sent one into the ruined reactor hall on the end of a drill bit. It survived radiation that killed anything with a battery and a chip - although all the luminescence was cooked. We set one on top of a field coil on a running core and it kept ticking. Not even Jupiter can kill them.

It's a bit fat. It is not elegant. It's no Patrol Watch.

Might help if you want to know what time it is in the middle of a Carrington event, if you're swimming in a spent fuel pool, or need to know how much time's left on the countdown to a Genesis detonation while you reset the mains.

Let me know how it goes for you, or if you know anyone who might have a use for them.

-Jet.

Okay, given the previous discussion in the planning thread about ITEM coming to San Antonio, this part will need to be changed to reflect that...

"Rob-san, you said you're a building manager in theory now?"

Rob sighed. "I should have kept my mouth shut." After a quick moment, he continued, "When I accepted what I thought was going to be a quick job to tide me over until my pension payments started, I though my role was to help the Senshi and the ladies from Judgment branch 177 adapt to a normal, quiet life. Help them learn how to live in a strange country, give them moral support, and all that. But it's been the exact opposite - things have been getting more stressful since last September, not less. AMALGAM, the Unseelie and ITEM in Ottawa, the Witches in San Antonio, Therestina in D.C., the medical issues that Minawa, Ginga, and Subaru have, that mess that Doc Doof made of so many cities... stress factors have been piling up, not going away. And we still don't know who played with our emotions way back when." He turned to Mike, who'd brought a tray of drinks. "Thanks, Mike." Leaving enough loonies on the tray for the round, he started passing them to his companions, keeping a Dominion City saison for himself and a Pelee Island Winery pinot noir for Hyoga.

"I thought ITEM was on our side now," Mamoru replied as he accepted a Sapporo.

Rob nodded weakly. "They are, Mamoru, but with friends like them... At least Mal only has to worry about Jayne. I have to worry about both Meltdowner and Frenda."

"But you are handling them," Mike pointed out as he pocketed the money. "You're more capable than you think you are."

"Thanks again, Mike. It's just wearing me out." He turned back to Keiichi. "And despite all that, I'm still keeping the workload off my lady-loves' shoulders."

Here's my proposed change...

"Rob-san, you said you're a building manager in theory now?"

Rob sighed. "I should have kept my mouth shut." After a quick moment, he continued, "When I accepted what I thought was going to be a quick job to tide me over until my pension payments started, I though my role was to help the Senshi and the ladies from Judgment branch 177 adapt to a normal, quiet life. Help them learn how to live in a strange country, give them moral support, and all that. But it's been the exact opposite - things have been getting more stressful since last September, not less. AMALGAM, the Unseelie and ITEM in Ottawa, the Witches and ITEM in San Antonio, Therestina in D.C., the medical issues that Minawa, Ginga, and Subaru have, that mess that Doc Doof made of so many cities... stress factors have been piling up, not going away. And we still don't know who played with our emotions way back when." He turned to Mike, who'd brought a tray of drinks. "Thanks, Mike." Leaving enough loonies on the tray for the round, he started passing them to his companions, keeping a Dominion City saison for himself and a Pelee Island Winery pinot noir for Hyoga.

"I thought ITEM was on our side now," Mamoru replied as he accepted a Sapporo.

Rob nodded weakly. "They are, Mamoru, but with friends like them... At least Mal only has to worry about Jayne. I have Benjamin has to worry about both Meltdowner and Frenda."

"But you are handling them," "Benjamin has them handled," Mike pointed out as he pocketed the money. "And don't try to put yourself down.  You're more capable than you think you are."

"Thanks again, Mike. It's just wearing me out." He turned back to Keiichi. "And despite all that, I'm still keeping the workload off my lady-loves' shoulders."

I think my character would also interject on Rob possibly taking too much onto himself - that he needs to find responsible and capable individuals to delegate tasks to.

Thoughts?

Probably around the late eighties to early nineties, there was a song that prominently featured the lyrics "bullet with ... butterfly wings," almost certainly at the end of the chorus since that's the only line I can rememeber. It is not the Smashing Pumpkins song by that title, which is all I can find trying to search for the words (and which at no point actually features them in the lyrics of the song itself) though the singer had a similarly rough-ish sound to his voice. In my mind, the music around that patch of vocals was almost but not quite like the end-of-chorus flourish from Prince's When Doves Cry on a guitar rather than piano, but this is rather less certain because that was also in rotation on MTV, which is definitely where I heard it, to get muddled together.

Along with showrunner Chris Chibnall.

Everybody, start prepping your betting pools for who's going to be the next Doctor.

Not a story post per se, but maybe sometime later...  This will be set sometime between the events of Full Metal Boogie and the Halloween Party.

Thing is, I've had this plot bunny in my head for some time - one where Teletha massively oversteps her bounds.  And my character, being the sort of patient man I am, sits and suffers her hurtful familiarity until he can't stand it anymore.

This would be the incident that she hints at with her inner monologue where she meets Haruka and Micheru.

Of course, I already have a few songs picked out, and I'd like to go over them a bit.

First off, from Teletha's perspective, there is Anna Nalick's "Breathe (2am)" for Teletha's perspective in the matter...

Quote:2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?
I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season."

Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize.
Hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason

Quote:'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe

Quote:May, he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
Just today he sat down to the flask in his fist,
He ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year.

Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.

Quote:2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to

And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
'Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to

Quote:Why do I deserve the silence
to feel better about you?
At a loss, I lost my cool
I denied that I found you

I tried to be a basket case
I did not surprise you
I'm trying to find a signal fire
Let me know when I should move

But you
Amplified in the silence
Justified in the way you make me bruise
Magnified in the science
Anatom-i-cal-ly proved
That you don't need me

Quote:Why do I desire the space?
I was mourning after you
I was lost and lost my shape
There was nothing I could do

I don't want to waste away
It was all I gave to you
Take me back and take my place
I will rise right up for you

But you
Amplified in the silence
Justified in the way you make me bruise
Magnified in the science
Anatom-i-cal-ly proved
That you don't need me

All the while you waste away, you're asking
"Did I really need another one to take me down?"
Everybody knows it's something that you had to live with darling
Nobody's gonna tear you down now
There is nothing you keep, there is only your reflection

Quote:There was nothing but quiet retractions
And families pleading, "Don't look in that cabinet!
There's far more bad than there's good, I don't know how it got there!"

That was something your father had burned in me
Twenty hours out of Homestake Eternity
You can go anywhere but you are where you came from

Quote:Little girl you are cursed by my ancestry
There is nothing but darkness and agony
I can not only see, but you stopped me from blinking

Quote:Let me watch you as close as a memory
Let me hold you above all the misery
Let me open my eyes and be glad that I got here

Dropping this here because of the controversial nature of alcohol abuse.

So.

I've been off my meds for a bit simply because I haven't been able to go and get them refilled.  WAAAYYYY too much to be done along the vein of, "If I don't do this, I'll become homeless soon."  And I don't dare use the VA's online-order refill-via-mail system because that shit ships all the way from goddamned Dallas, TX.  You'd think that San Antonio would have such a hub for itself, but nooooooooo....  And with something that important?  There is SO MUCH THAT CAN GO WRONG on a 250+ miles long mail route, no matter what the mail carrier's motto says.  It only says it will get there, not how soon.

Don't blame me, blame the system.

That said...  I popped by a convenience store to indulge in something I've dearly missed because I've been on the meds for so long.

Angry Orchard.

Those who know it already know what I mean are probably salivating at the very mention.  It is one of the most delicious mass-produced hard ciders out there.

So, here I am enjoying the nice fuzzy feeling that comes from imbibing a few bottles of my most favorite booze in the world when I get to thinking...  "Hey, waituhminute.  I move a helluva lot more smoothly when I'm a bit tipsy... even taking into account the slight dizziness.  I also feel A LOT MORE AT EASE.  Is there some kind of connection between Autism and Alcohol?"

Short answer?  Yes.

Basically, alcohol "takes the edge off" that makes the world so difficult for people with autism to deal with.  But like with any drug, alcohol can easily be abused.  Which is why people with Autism (And especially people who have Autism and don't know it!) wind up becoming (functional?) alcoholics.

I don't believe that there've been any papers written on the matter just yet, but there is the article where I've gotten my info from...

https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-gui...sm-alcohol

The author finishes with this bit...

Quote:Ultimately, in my opinion, autistic people live well when they know themselves, their strengths and their limitations, and are able to navigate a path through a complex social and changeable world without needing to rely on harmful panaceas. For professionals I believe this should be the goal of support, especially in a world where alcohol is perceived as an accepted social tool.

In Sword Oratoria, spells cast by elfs require a magic circle. The setting has Instant Runes, so they don't need to draw the circle, but they do need to concentrate on maintaining it or the spell fizzles. The "Concurrent Casting" technique lets a spellcaster delay the appearance of the Instant Runes to near the end of the casting. As soon as the story's deuteragonist Lefiya learns the technique and is able to move around (or play dead) while casting, she goes from being a Glass Cannon to being Little Miss Badass.

"But that's in that story, and this subforum's about a completely different story," I hear you say.

The basic principle still applies. Immobile mages - and immobile magical girls - are obvious targets. Mobility provides strength.

Consider how many of the Sailor Senshi's canon attacks are of the "pose, point, and speak a trigger phrase" variety, leaving them open to quick counterattacks because they're just standing there. This isn't much of an issue in canon when they're only going up against harvester youma, but the story's already diverged from canon in that Beryl's ordered bodyguard youma be deployed to protect the harvesters.

Can Doug help the Senshi get rid of the "pose" part of their rituals, and let them be able to use run-and-gun or attack-from-behind-cover tactics against the bodyguards?